Fire And Ice
by NiGhT-sTaLkEr13
Summary: Going through Megatron's younger years, this story explores his relationship with Char and how he met her to how they grew before the night he raped and murdered his first victim.
1. Chapter 1

Fire And Ice.

**WARNING: The following story will contain profanity, sexual abuse, angst, dark psychological themes, sexual references, violence, gore and sexual violence. Please read at own risk.**

Time: Pre-war, childhood

NOTE: Bold text will signify Megatron's darker personality. 

**- Summary:**

**- Going through Megatron's younger years, this story explores his relationship with Char and how he met her to how they grew before the night he raped and murdered his first victim. **

**- Chapters: 1-10**

**- Written in: 2012**

Part I.

It was strange. Well, actually, it was more than strange. Megatron didn't really know where to go with this. He'd only met the femme a few solar-cycles back, and already he could feel himself becoming… attached. It didn't help she was pretty much the only 'bot who spoke to him these days, besides his new therapist, Gammaray. Even so, it had only been once… But it still had felt like at least _something_ to him.  
Could he even call it attached? He didn't even know the meaning to half of his feelings, all he knew was that when she was around, a sudden dark aura was lifted—even if his own dark thoughts would come into play. However, for now, his mind was simply too young to think of anything like love. Plus, it was way too early for something like that to happen in the space of just a few solar-cycles and only one conversation. Sheesh, what had it been? Two or three days of school, and that was it?  
At the innocent age of thirteen, Megatron was just beginning to develop sexually. His systems clearly knew of what sexual contact was like, due to what his mother treated him like, but to think of someone else romantically was something that hadn't quite crossed his mind yet. His mind saw femmes as nothing but walking valves to fuck, but that was just in general due to his upbringing. Personally, his feelings for Char were simply friendly. Nothing more, nothing less. Still, she happened to awaken at least _something_ in him. He gathered it was just because he finally had had a real conversation with someone, though. He did fear that she would never bother with him again, though—just like the rest of them.  
He was at his desk, the guardian talking up the front. Usually, he'd be listening quite carefully, but there was something distracting him. It was her. Char. She and her father were walking across the schoolyard, most likely getting her used to her new school routine. He would have offered to look after her himself, but they were in different grades, and he had a feeling Gammaray and the Director would have said no—considering his psychological and social conditions. It wasn't his fault he was violent a lot of the time. Plus… he'd never hurt the femme. How could he? She was… beautiful.  
No. No, that wasn't right. Calling her that? Primus, that's what his mother called him when she touched him in the fucking port. There was no way in hell he could all her something as defiling as that. But… was there really any other word for it?  
Her perfect visage. Those nice legs, those gorgeous cerulean optics that made his spark flutter. "Primus, get a grip," he mumbled to himself as he looked back to his data-pad and shook his head. No. He refused to see her in any sexual manner. Not just because he was simply too young, but because he didn't _want_ violence done to her. To him, everything sex-orientated involved violence. Especially considering what he looked up when he was on his own home computer.  
Hearing the recess bell ring, he grabbed his data-pad and walked out of the room, making his way to the locker that was in his name. It was no surprise that there was more shit written on the front of it, a bunch of older mechs standing beside it as he approached it. He would have turned back sooner, but they had caught his optics, which meant he didn't want to seem like a weakling to them. No, he wouldn't let them get to him. He was stronger than that.  
Ignoring the noises that came from them, he opened the locker, throwing his pad inside and grabbing the few coins he had collected over the days off the floor of the academy. They'd pay for at least a snack that he could get from the canteen. Not much, but it was better than nothing at all.  
Feeling a hand on his shoulder, he tensed, getting ready for the worst. However, when a soft voice accompanied it, his optics widened in surprise, making him turn around and face the femme. It was her.

"Hey, I didn't think I'd see you around much more," said Char, her optics soft as she looked to the much rougher being. Sure, Megatron may be a little rough on the outside, but he was still an attractive looking teenager. Although, she did worry that he was a lot taller than her, which probably made others think the worst of them being seen together. Grades always had such a difference over age—even though it wouldn't seem that way when they would actually grow up and be out of school.

Giving a small smile, Megatron shrugged. "I would have offered to show you around before you had to be taken to class, but I don't think it would have been a great idea," he said, pursing his lips together as she gave him a questioning look. "I didn't think you'd actually care to come and talk to me again, you know, being in a lower grade and all."

Char gave a soft laugh, hitting him lightly on the arm. "You think a grade will stop me from seeing the only mech who would have offered to show me around?" she asked, giving a light smile. "I would have rather been seen with you than my father having to show me around the place."

Swallowing, Megatron's brow furrowed for a moment. "Have you _seen_ my locker…?" he asked, pushing it closed so she could see the numerous insults written on it—mostly about his mother, calling her a whore, et cetera.

Reading them, Char couldn't exactly make sense of them. She didn't know Megatron's family. Primus, she just arrived here in Kaon only a few solar-cycles back. Her family had to move due to her father's work, and Kaon seemed to be the best industrial areas. He was a hydraulics engineer. Nothing she really understood, but she gathered it was important, right? He always seemed to be stressing over it.  
"Why would anyone say those things…?" she asked, looking up to the taller mech as he didn't seem all too fazed by it. Was this just something regular that happened to him? Primus, the older sparklings must be terrible if this was how they acted in higher grades.

"They aren't towards m—never mind," he said, leaning back against the locker as he locked it. He didn't really want another 'bot harassing him about the fact that his mother was nothing but a two timing whore. Pff, two? He wished. Unfortunately, it was much more than that.  
"Uh… are you doing anything? I could show you the canteen if you want? I was just heading there myself," he said, giving a nervous look as she turned her optics back to him. Primus, they were almost orb-like. Her violet and black form was simply too pretty for a younger femme than himself. Primus, she didn't even have any curves yet!

"They have a canteen here?" she asked, her optics seeming to brighten at that. "You're too kind. I'd love to go with you," she said, giving another soft smile as she took his arm. Of course, growing up in a much nicer school than Kaon Public was something that had rubbed off on her. Her friends were polite and friendly, not cold and awkward. So a simple arm link was nothing to her, and she didn't think anything of it.

Looking down, Megatron gave a confused look. "W-what are you doing…?" he asked, arching his optics as her warm arm linked around his. If this was some kind of game, he didn't understand it. All he knew was that this was the first time in his life that someone else besides his mother had touched him this gently. And it was just a simple link of the arms, like any friend would do just to have a joke with one another while walking.  
Something in the pit of his belly gave an awkward shudder, and he felt something below his stomach tingle at the simple warmth that was against him.  
**'Such a pretty femme… And she's holding your arm? Talk about a first move, Megatron… Second date and already on second base, little boy? Primus, I'm getting hard over this…'**  
At hearing the voice inside his head, Megatron tugged his arm back, taking a step away from the femme. No. He wouldn't let that thing get to her. He couldn't. Not this time. It was okay when he was at home and alone, but out in public was a whole different thing. Especially to someone who was being so kind to him. The only 'bot in school that even took a second look at him. And yet… the voice was right. He could feel it burning in the pit of his… He didn't even know! All he knew was that his spark was thumping hard in his chest, but it wasn't the normal thumping from fear of his mother or father. It was… something else.

"A-are you okay…?" asked the femme, her optics clearly worried as she watched the mech take a step backwards. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"No, it-it's not that," said Megatron, feeling guilty that he had stepped away from the angelic form in front of him. "I… I have to go. I'm sorry," he mumbled, lowering his helm and walking down the hallway.  
He didn't want to have to leave her, and he didn't want to waste his chance of finally having a friend, but would else could he do? He couldn't let whatever was happening to him corrupt her, too. Every time he heard that vial voice inside his head, something bad happened! He didn't want to hurt her like that. But why…? Why was she any different to the others? She was still a femme. She was still what his mother was. She was what his mother _wanted_. Not the disgusting mech he was.  
Pushing the bathroom door open, he sat inside one of the cubicles, running his hands down his face as he leant into the wall behind him. "Please don't do this…" he whispered to himself, looking down at the aroused state he was in. Why did this happen when he saw femmes!? He didn't understand! Why would he want to like something that did nothing but torture him and make him suffer under her vial hands? He enjoyed seeing them in pain and suffering, not wanting to spend actual time with them. Plus, it was only a game on the computer. He knew it wasn't _real_. It was just a good way to release his stress and get to watch them being tormented under a higher power.  
Megatron didn't understand why he liked watching the violence. He hadn't when he was younger, but as he was growing up, there was something that triggered his desires. Something he couldn't recall, but it was there. Seeing them in oil. Seeing them cold and stiff. Dead. Being tortured. Being raped. There was something that made his spark thump, his body shake and his cable go harder than it ever had before.  
**'And to think, you could do it all to her…'** said the voice within the youngling's head, making him grasp the sides of his helm.  
"No… no, no, no," he whispered, clenching his jaw tight as he fangs bared. He would not do that to her! He would not see her covered in such filth and violence! But then why was his spark thumping so hard for it? Along with something else…  
Looking down, he made a terrified breath as he realised he was completely hard over it. Inside his casing, he could feel that snake pulsing painfully against the inside of the metal cover. He could feel the warm liquid seep out of that slit on the end as he was beginning to lubricate.  
**'Come on, Megatron. You know you want it. Take her tight valve and shove your shaft into her. Make her scream in your wildest fantasies, like on the videos you watch. Make her scream your name. Make her ****_bleed_**** for you! She wants it as much as you do! She want ****_you!_**** A pretty little femme like that, and touching your arm so blindly? You think it's all a game? Oh, no. She wants you pounding that tight valve and filling her with your lubricant.'**  
Where had this even _come_ from!? Since when was his cable the main priority!? And since when was Char some target of his? What just happened!? She was fucking twelve! Primus, he wasn't some disgusting paedophile like his mother was. In fact, he wasn't anything like that at all! He wasn't even sexually attracted to Char, she was just a friend—or so he thought. It was like all of a sudden his sexual systems just kicked into overdrive and everything was on autopilot.  
Placing his hand to the wall, he gave a silent groan as a sharp pain stabbed into his brain, making him clasp the side of his helm once more, his jaw down tight. It was happening again. That _thing_ was beginning to fuck with him, and he couldn't help but feel his hand grab at his cod-piece and remove it, lubricant running down the standing shaft as it throbbed with every spark-beat.  
"Oh… shit," he whispered, covering his mouth as he gave a lengthy moan, hoping to Primus that no one had heard him, thought he was pretty sure the bathroom was empty right now. And within seconds, he was standing over the bowl, his lubricant spurting hard and hitting the bowl of the toilet, dripping down in thick strands down the sides of his cable.  
Panting, he leant his helm against the wall in front of him, still standing over the toilet. "Primus…" he whispered, his optics actually glazed in tears as everything seemed to happen much too fast. He just didn't understand where it had all come from. Why was he lusting so much? He'd seen interfacing before, and not even that had made him overload as hard and fast as the thought of Char beneath him.  
For his own sake, he was happy that he heard the bell ring, and he quickly cleaned himself up, washing his hands and heading to the next subject. Unfortunately, when he was half way through the corridor, he felt something smack into his shoulder, causing him to stumble back a few steps.

"Megatron, is that you?" asked a soft voice, looking to the youngling as he seemed to be pacing much too quickly in the corridors.

Looking up, the future warlord swallowed as he heard the voice and looked into those violet optics. "Sorry, I was just making sure to make it in time for the next class," he said, his optics lowering as he felt a sharp pain enter the left side of his head. _Not now_, he thought.

"Are you okay? You seem a bit twitchy," said the mech, leaning down a little. "If you wanna take a time out, you know I can get you a pass out of class, Megatron. No problem at all," he said, giving a light smile.

"Please, I really need to get to class, I'm already behind," said the youngling, walking past the therapist, though stopping when a hand was placed to his shoulder. He snapped, though, turning around and pushing the older mech from him. "Get away from me!"

As students began to look at the scene, Gammaray quirked an optic ridge, looking to the mech in concern. "Megatron, I'm going to have to session you sooner or later."

"Well make it later, just get the fuck out of my way," snapped the silver mech, pushing himself past his therapist. He didn't want to talk to the mech right now. Not after his own confusion to what had just happened.  
He couldn't tell him about Char. What would he say? He'd call him disgusting, especially for having to masturbate in the bathroom over dark thoughts of her. No, it was wrong to tell him. Plus, he didn't want to put her in the spotlight. Hell, he hardly _knew_ the femme! He shouldn't have even jacked off over her at all! But he had, and that's what worried and confused him…

Watching as the youngling pushed his way through the crowd of school children, Gammaray frowned. He'd only known Megatron for a few lunar-cycles, but there was certainly something strange about him. So many things were screaming at him, telling him to diagnose him with this or that. But… without the full knowledge, or the cooperation of Megatron, he didn't know how far this case would proceed. He certainly didn't think or know that this would be his toughest case yet. Or the case that would eventually send him to his grave.

*****  
It was lunch time, and like usual, Megatron found himself sitting on one of the benches by himself. He'd grabbed some food from the canteen this time. Like he knew, it wasn't much, but it would do until he got home—even though his stomach chamber was growling horridly at him.  
With his left hand holding the data-marker, he was scribbling lazily on it, the marker coming up on the screen—easily like a tablet on a computer. It was actually his homework sheet he was meant to be working on, but something made him not want to answer the questions. He was smart enough to know his times tables and algebra shit, he didn't need to do homework sheets on it. And instead, he found himself scribbling down a certain something.  
He knew his grades were falling, and he was failing just about every subject. It wasn't because of the lack of knowledge—he was actually a very smart mech. But the motivation simply wasn't there. And without that motivation, how was he supposed to pass anything?  
Once upon a time, he didn't mind school. It was somewhere to get away from home, and something to exercise his mind, but growing up, and with his system's changes, he literally felt like there was no point to any of this.  
School grades didn't determine how smart you were, it was the real world, out there, that made you smart. The experience out there was the thing that really mattered, not the bullshit that they got from data-pads here. Sure, it was a good way of learning, and taking that first step, but it was still nothing to what he knew was actually out there on Cybertron. He didn't need to be around this bunch of fuck-tards to know that the world could be cruel. He already knew it was. He suffered under its wrath every fucking solar-cycle! The only thing that gave him a sense of peace was when he was left alone, away from everyone else, and away from the temptations and demons of his life.  
Hearing a bag being put onto the bench beside him, he quickly sat up, closing the top of his data-pad awkwardly as he saw the 'bot who stood there, lunch in their hand. Damnit, she probably thought he was some kind of freak from before. He didn't mean to act so strangely, he just didn't want to hurt her, or even worse, tell her about how much of a fucked up mech he was in the head. Hearing voices? Primus, she'd surely leave in a spark-beat.

"Megatron… I'm sorry about before," said the femme, her optics lowering as she asked if she could take the seat beside him. When he nodded, she softly sat down, looking apologetic towards him. "I didn't know you didn't like being touched. My old school was… well, we were all so close. We were all really friendly with one another."

Watching as the femme apologised, Megatron gave a soft sigh. "Don't be sorry," he mumbled, looking down at his hands that were on the bench. "I don't mind you touching me. I mean… uh, that came out wrong," he said, feeling himself give an awkward blush.

Char gave her signature giggle, feeling herself blush just as much, though pushing it aside. "Friends?" she asked, looking to the mech as their optics met. There was something dark in them, but it wasn't evil, it was something… different. Something that needed help.  
She was a loving femme by nature. Her family were closer than close, and they told each other almost everything. She shared a wonderful relationship with her mother, and her parents helped her in any way possible. It was simply in her nature to help whoever she saw who needed it. She was just a sweet femme, and she always would be. Plus, she loved the company of others. She was a very sociable femme. Being alone wasn't her kind of thing, but she certainly knew others who liked their privacy and space—hence why she apologised to the mech. She didn't want to hurt his feelings.

"You… really want to be my friend?" asked the silver mech, his optics arching in surprise. No one simply asked him to be a friend. In fact, everyone seemed to avoid him due to the fact that he was seeing a psychiatrist. Nobody wanted to befriend the crazy mech.

Giving a soft smile, Char nodded. "Of course. You're sweet, in your own distant way," she said, giving another soft giggle as the mech gave an awkward look, but nodded at the offer. "Great. So, what were you drawing?" she asked, putting her hand over the pad and slipping it across the table.

"Uh…!" Before he could react, Char had flipped the lid over and turned it on, seeing the sketch. "Please don't think I'm a freak, I just… I sketch when I'm feeling down."

Looking at the replica of herself, Char felt her spark warm up. She thought nothing freakishly of it. It was beautiful. She didn't think she was the most attractive femme, but he had done her more than justice in making her look beautiful here.  
"You drew this…?" she asked, looking up. "It's amazing," she whispered, watching as the mech sank into his shoulders. "What's wrong? I don't think you're a freak, if that's what you're worried about. I love watching artists draw. It's an honour to have such a wonderful artist as yourself draw like this."

Swallowing hard, Megatron looked at the pad. Luckily, it wasn't his personal one, and simply one of the ones with his school work on it. If it were a personal one, then she would have probably been terrified by half of the gory shit he had drawn in it.  
"You really think they're good?" he asked, quirking an optic ridge. He rarely got complimented on his work. Sure, he was a hit in the actual art class (by the guardians), but when at home, his parents never encouraged him, nor did they care that he drew or was learning how to play the piano in his spare time.

"They're more than good, Megatron," said Char, giving an innocent look. "You should be famous," she stated, giving a light laugh at the mech's deadpan face. "I see you still haven't changed in being so tense when I first met you."

"That was three solar-cycles ago…" stated Megatron, frowning. "I'm hardly used to having a friend, let alone a femme friend," he said, looking away. "Besides, your father was taking you around the academy… I didn't want to look like some kind of stalker."

Char laughed again, giving another lovely smile. "You're funny," she said, her optics softening. "Do you wanna share my lunch? My mum always makes way too much for me, plus, I noticed you only ate such a small amount. Do you have anything else?"

Returning his optics back to the smaller femme, Megatron didn't know how to take the offer. No one had ever been so kind and caring towards him. Not even Gammaray. Sure, the mech was his therapist, but most of the time, he simply got a cold edged feeling from him, like he was merely a droid and not actually trying to help him emotionally—rather just for the credits.  
"I'm okay, I wouldn't want to get you into trouble with your mother," he said, not always realising that not every mother out there was the same as his. He knew that he was being wronged by being molested, but what could he say to anyone else? He couldn't simply ask another student if it were fine, they'd call him a freak. Not to mention the fact he already _knew_ it was wrong. Plus, he was terrified of being called a liar, and that would just encourage his father to beat him even more than he already did. Who, in their right mind, would possibly believe him? Not after all the shit he had been caught doing.

With a raised optic, Char was confused. "Why would I get into trouble by my mum? She'd love knowing I was helping someone else," she said, handing over some of the energon cake she had. "Plus, I want to share it with you."

Hesitantly, Megatron took the piece of spongy energon cake into his hand, giving an accusing look to it. He'd had this happen before. Some kid thought it would be funny to put something inside it which made him incredibly sick. This wasn't just another sick joke like that, was it?

Watching the mech, the femme giggled again. "It's not poisoned, I promise," she said, biting into her own piece and swallowing it before giving another innocent smile.

The thing was, he believed her. But why? Was it her innocent look? Did he just 'know' her type? He didn't know, but his spark was urging him to believe her, and he did. Without questions. Which made him question what the hell was going on.  
Nonetheless, he picked it up and bit into it, feeling the soft, spongy material mush inside his mouth. "That's good…" he said with his mouth full, causing Char to burst into a laughing fit. This time, he couldn't help but laugh himself, swallowing the last of it and giving a much softer smile, showing his denta.

"My mum will be happy you like it," said Char. "I hope you don't mind me saying, but you have a very nice smile. You should smile more often. You have perfect teeth…"

A little surprised, Megatron felt his lips part, making him look away as his face burned. "Uh… thank you, I guess," he said, giving an awkward noise. He'd never been complimented, except for by his mother—which wasn't really the best feeling. But Char wasn't his mother, she was another Cybertronian, and she was a beautiful one. How could _she_ be complimenting someone like _him?_  
Something was telling him he wanted to spend more time with her. He wanted to actually get to _know_ her, which was unusual, considering how much he hated everyone else. All he knew was that he liked her, in a friendly manner, and it was strange.  
She was so nice to him, complimenting him endlessly, not having said one negative thing about him. She was different. She was… well, kind. The first 'bot to ever be this kind to him. It wasn't like he wasn't welcoming it, it was just a lot to take in, but he wasn't complaining, it was just awkward. He simply didn't know how to act.  
"A-are you doing anything after school…?" he asked, swallowing hard as he bit down on his tongue. He didn't even know what had pushed him to say that! It just slipped out, like this confidence all of a sudden jumped out of him. Now where the hell was he meant to go from here? Hell, it wasn't like he'd invite her over to his place. His mother would kick her out for sure. She hated any femme looking at him, as if he were her complete and utter property or something. And his father would just be rude, saying horrible, sexual insults. It was no place to bring a friend. Especially a femme friend.

"My mum will be picking me up, but that's all. I could ring her and tell her to pick me up later if you like?" asked the femme, her optics bright. He really wanted to hang out with her? She didn't understand why Megatron had no friends. He was so kind. She knew he got into some fights (considering when they met he had stated so), but other than that, he was a sweetie.

"She won't mind…?" asked Megatron, feeling his spark tighten for some reason. "I-I mean, you don't have to, I just thought we could… hang," he said, rubbing the back of his neck.

Giving a wide smile, Char waved her hand. "It's not a problem, Megatron. I'd love to, uh… 'hang'," she giggled, Megatron giving another awkward smile. "Your parents won't mind?"

Lowering his optics for a moment, Megatron shook his head. "No, they'll be fine with it," he said, putting on a strong look and giving another smile. "They don't… really mind what I do, as long as I'm home before dinner."

"Lucky," said the femme, giving a small shake of the head. "If my mum and dad found out I was hanging with a mech and not telling them, I'd probably be grounded," she said, looking to the silver'bot. "They're pretty strict on knowing where I am. Don't get me wrong, they love me being able to be with friends, but I just have to tell them about it. My mum and dad are pretty relaxed in the house, and they trust me, but they have to know where I am at all times."

"They sound… caring," said Megatron, giving a small frown to himself. He only wished he had parents like Char. His mother and father couldn't give a rat's arse about what he did or where he was. If he went missing, they probably wouldn't even notice. So he had a curfew to be home before dinner, but he doubted if he didn't come home before then that they would care. It would simply be another reason for his father to hit him up against a wall and his mother to sooth him later on.

Char didn't object to that. Her parents were very caring, and she knew that they loved her with all they had. She was an only child, she understood why they cared and worried about her so much. But like she said, they trusted her not to get into trouble. Besides, she was only young; it wasn't like she was going to parties or anything.  
Hearing the bell ring, Char looked across the yard, watching as mechs and femmes of all shapes and sizes were beginning to move back into the complex. "What do you have next?" she asked, picking up her bag as Megatron grabbed his data-pad.

Looking down at his unfinished homework, Megatron gave a sigh. "Maths…" he murmured, knowing he'd have after school detention for this. "I might be a bit later than I thought… Do you have a number I could call?" he asked. "I wouldn't want you thinking I stood you up or anything."  
He had to freeze as he realised the sudden boost of confidence he had just gotten. That was… odd, but he wasn't complaining. At least the voice inside his head wasn't bothering him, and at least he hadn't run into Gammaray again. He only figured it was his teenage hormones beginning to kick in.

"Sure," said Char, grabbing out a spare data-sheet from her bag and writing down the Cybertronian numbers. "Call there. I'll make sure to pick up the phone, so don't worry."

Taking the torn piece of data-sheet, Megatron read the number before slipping it into his data-pad. "I'll call as soon as I can, I promise," he said, giving a nervous smile.

Char giggled, knowing he would when he could. "I'll see you after school, then. I hope maths isn't too hard on you," she said, waving goodbye as she headed for her next class.

Standing for a moment, Megatron opened the data-pad back up and took the piece of sheet, reading the number again. It looked genuine, and he believed it was. Still, there was a part of him that was just waiting for it to be fake or something. But that was simply his experience talking. Char was different, and his gut and spark were telling him that she wouldn't lie to him. Not those optics. Those perfect, pearly optics.  
**'My little mech is growing up… Already just a phone call away? I'm so proud of you.' **  
Gripping the side of his helm, Megatron shook it, breathing hard as something hard pulsed into the side of his brain. "Please go away… Please…" he whispered to himself, clenching his optics before looking back up. He had to get to class. He was already going to get into trouble for not finishing his homework; he didn't want extra time added to that because he was late, too.

**Author's Comment:**

****I'm actually quite nervous about posting this. Mainly because of the fact that it's just so angsty and teenage-ery. It's certainly something out of my complete comfort zone, and something I'm really not sure if my watchers will enjoy. But it's going to be an experience for me, so that's all that counts. =3

I have to thank *xLosersRuleTheWorldx for inspiring me to start this up. She inspired me to actually try and give it a go. I've always enjoyed writing little snippets of angst between these two, but this'll give me a better way of exploring Char's character, and it will give a better insight to Megatron as a youngling and just how much their relationship progresses.

I know I went through parts of Megatron's childhood during _I Walk Beside You_, but we only saw a little bit, so this will specifically be focusing on this part of Megatron's life. Char and the events that happened between them being friends. You'll also see a little more of Statik, Gammaray, Angra and Puncture as they were in Megatron's childhood. So hopefully that'll help some people on seeing their characters more developed, too.

If you haven't read my other series before this, it will most likely contains a WHOLE bunch of childhood spoilers, and maybe some future ones, too. You don't need to read those ones to understand everything here, though. Everything will most likely have a run over, so you shouldn't have too much trouble. But if you want to grasp the WHOLE story, please read from the beginning called **What Lies Ahead** [voms a little bit at having to give that]

I thought it made sense to make Char violet, black and white. It's a clusterfuck on Megatron. Might be the reason why he loves purple so much, and black and white for obvious reasons. [his mother and black and white].

I hope some people do enjoy this...


	2. Chapter 2

Part II.

**WARNING: This chapter contains mentions of sexual violence, abuse and masturbation. Please read at own risk.**

NOTE: Bold text will be Megatron's second personality. 

Like he figured, Megatron was sitting in detention. There were a few other 'bots inside the room with him, most of their heads down, either sleeping or actually finishing their homework. He had no intentions of finishing his, and he would usually be doing the same, lazily sitting here until the guardian kicked them out. However, this time was different.  
Knowing he had a purpose of getting out of here, his head was down, his left hand scribbling in the answers as fast as he could. He knew he didn't _have_ to finish the work, but if he _did_, as soon as he was done, he'd just have to hand it in to the guardian and then he would be free to go—not having to stay until the guardian couldn't keep them in anymore.  
Biting his lower lip, he wrote the numbers down like a maniac. It would have seemed like he'd never missed a class at all, and that he was constantly paying attention. This was what he had meant by not needing to do this shit. He knew it already. He wasn't stupid. He just had no interest, and little to no motivation. But now he did. He was motivated to get the hell out of here and call that number as soon as possible.  
Stopping for a moment, he slid the torn piece of data-sheet out and looked at the number again, something in his spark warming up. It was the first real motivation he had had in a long time. Sure, it was awakening something else inside him, but for once, he felt… happy. He just didn't want to get his hopes up in case it was all just a cheap lie.  
Putting it back away, he didn't want to get into trouble, or let anyone else see what he had, and he continued finishing the homework, finally slipping the sheet out of the data-pad and standing. "Here you go," he said, placing it down onto the desk and beginning to walk out.

"Megatron, wait," said the guardian, her optics wide as the mech had actually finished his homework. Usually when he had detention, he would just sit there and gaze out the window or something. But having the youngling place the sheet on here as if he had finished? Was this some kind of joke?  
As he turned around, she picked up the sheet, giving him a serious look. "You're not just lying so you can get out early, are you?" she asked, watching him carefully. Every guardian in the school knew there was something wrong with the kid, and he was a lot of talk to the teachers who shared him in separate classes. Finishing his homework wasn't a daily routine. Something was up.

"Check it for yourself," said the silver mech, his optics looking to the sheet. "Why would I lie?"

Well, the sparkling had a point. Still, she'd known many 'bots to lie and just fill in bullshit answers to get out. "Alright, I'll mark them for you before you go, just to make sure," she said, putting the pad down and reading through the answers.

Halving his optics, Megatron gave a rough sigh, moving his pede up and down as he leant against the wall. He didn't have time for this! He didn't want Char to think he was being a dick to her and simply going to stand her up. He should have just told her that he was going to have detention… It would have saved a lot of hassle. Then again, he was sure her mother wouldn't have wanted her to meet up with someone who was spending his afternoon in detention, would she?

Surprised, the older femme gave a hum, nodding her head. "Well done, they're all correct. You may go," she said, though uncertain to why or how this happened. Megatron wasn't a slow student; he was just very emotionally… Well, something wasn't right in him. She knew that much.

Grabbing the sheet from her, Megatron placed it back into his pad and gave a quick thank you, walking out of the classroom. Now, he had to find a payphone and call Char, because there was no way in hell he was going to go back home. It would turn into 20 Questions if he picked up the phone, and he certainly didn't want his parents knowing of the femme.  
Heading to the front office, he grabbed a shanix from his bag pocket and slipped it into the payphone up front. He was hesitant to dial, in case the worst happened, but here was to hoping.

*****  
"You met a mech? What's his name?" asked the older femme, watching her daughter as she unpacked her schoolbag. Primus, how she was everything to her. She was a gorgeous femme, and she was such a lovely little thing. She and her partner had brought her up well, and both were proud of her.

"His name is Megatron," answered Char, putting her lunchbox onto the table. "He's really nice," she praised, though stopping when she looked at her mother. "What's wrong…?"

Looking to her partner, the femme known as Statik gave a frown. "Megatron?" she asked, giving a worried look. "I've heard his name come up a few times while I was in the school talking to some of the other mothers and guardians. I'm not sure if he's the right mech for you to be making friends with, darling."

But why? Char watched as her parents gave another worried glance to one another. What was wrong with him? Why did everyone think so negative of him!? He was a wonderful mech! He was polite, and had a lovely smile. Sure, he was quiet and awkward when talking, but she figured that was just because no one had given him the time for him to warm up to them.  
"But he's really nice…" she said, her voice soft as her optics lowered. "He wouldn't hurt a cyber-fly. He was a little awkward, but that was all. I just think he needs a friend, someone to help him socialise better," she tried to say; as if convincing her parents that they were wrong about him.

Giving a soft smile, Statik leant down. "Honey, if you think he's nice, I'm glad he's nice to you. I trust your judgement, sweetie. If you say he's nice, then I believe you," she said, running her hand down Char's cheek before standing back up.  
As Char gave a trusting smile and walked from the room, she looked back to her partner, Ryde. "I've heard things about his mother… very bad things, Ryde. I don't know if I want my daughter becoming part of that freak show," she said, concern in her voice.

Ryde gave a soft chuckle. "What could be that bad? He's just a young mech," he stated. He was more concerned about Megatron than who his parents were. The mech was thirteen and talking to his daughter? He knew mechs at that age, as he had once been the same. They wanted one thing, and one thing only. A femme to romance so they could get into their port.

"His mother is the street whore," stated Statik, giving a frown. "Haven't you spoken to any of the mothers and fathers around here? That kid is trouble, I tell you. What good could come from a whore of a mother?"

"Darling, stop worrying," stated the older mech. "Char's fine. She's a smart femme. She knows what she is doing, and she knows who is right and wrong to talk to. She's just making friends, and that's what we wanted for her to do, right?" he asked, watching Statik give a sigh as she nodded. "Now, c'mon, put a little more faith into our daughter. Let her go and play with whoever she trusts. You trust her judgement, don't you?"

Leaning against her partner, Statik gave another soft sigh. "Of course I do. I just worry. She's growing up, Ryde… One day she'll be all grown up and have her own little batch of sparklings."

Giving a soft grin, Ryde placed an arm over his bonded. "Everyone grows up, Statik. Even you and I," he said, giving her a light kiss on the forehead. "Now, why don't you show me some of those new moves of yours, hmm?"

Slapping her hand against the mech's chest, Statik gave a light laugh, the two of them being a very open couple. To her, interfacing was as natural as anything, however, he views on femmes like Angra, Megatron's mother, were completely different. A whore was a whore, there was no compassion in that. Just dirty lust. Love was something to be cherished, and she hoped she had taught her daughter the same thing.

*****  
Sitting down at the park, Megatron was seated on the bench, watching as some of the other kids from school were playing on the equipment. He would have tried somewhere more secluded, but he didn't exactly want Char to think he was some freaky murderer—despite what had truly died in his hands. That and she were new, so he chose somewhere where she'd know where to go.  
It took a while, but soon enough, he saw Char walking across the small, synthetic park area, holding a small box of something. It got him thinking, this wasn't just going to be some prank, was it? No, he had to stop thinking like that! She showed, didn't she? She'd been nice to him through and through. He had no reason to jump to conclusions with her. It was a force of habit—one which he clearly needed to break.  
"I hope it wasn't too much trouble to get here," he said, giving a small smile as the femme shook her head with a laugh, sitting beside him on the bench-top. "Your parents didn't mind?"

Looking up, Char gave the mech a curious look, wanting to know why her parents would say such things about him. What had Megatron done that was so wrong to make everyone in the school talk about him in such negative ways? Why were there insults all over his locker? Why didn't he have any friends?  
"Megatron, I want to be honest with you," she said, her optics looking to his own, which seemed to become quite nervous about something. "Don't worry, I'm not going to yell at you or anything, I… I just want to ask you something."

Parting his lips, the silver mech lowered his optics, looking to his dark hands that were between his knees. "Is it something about my parents?" he asked, giving a soft breath. He couldn't tell her how horrible they were; she'd run away or tease him like everyone else did. He didn't _enjoy_ that his mother was nothing but a whore, but what could he do? She was what she was…

"My mum and dad were cautious about you, I won't lie," she said, looking to the older mech. "They said they had heard things. Bad things… I didn't want to bother you, but I want to be honest and upfront with you. Friendship shouldn't be built on lies, and I really like you. I don't want to lose a good friend because of hearing what my parents have to say."

Biting down onto his jaw, Megatron's optics narrowed for a moment. How he wanted to turn to her and yell at her for such filth coming from her mouth. But it wasn't lies… She was telling the truth. He wasn't this happy and friendly mech. In fact, he was far from what she was seeing in him. He was nothing but a cold sparked murderer. But something was telling him to be upfront with her, that he didn't want to loser her friendship. That he _couldn't_ lose her friendship.  
"My mother is… not like yours," he said, looking to the femme. He wanted to just walk away. He didn't want to have to tell anyone about this. Not even Gammaray. He was ashamed of what he had to live with. Those 'bots weren't parents. They were nothing of the sort. They were filthy liars and cheats who beat and molested their child! He didn't want Char to see or know of that at all. He didn't want her to look at him like he was nothing but a filthy, used piece of scrap metal.  
"My family is, uh…" Shaking his head, he looked to the femme, giving a sigh as he stood up. "Who am I kidding? My family is complete shit," he stated, giving a shrug. "My mother treats me like I'm not even there, and my father beats me as soon as he fucking can. It's not a family! It's nothing but a disgrace, Char. Your parents are caring, and they obviously admire you. Mine? All I dream and pray about is to get the hell out of there! Every day I suffer from being under their hands! And… all they do is cheat and lie and punish me for each other's wrongs. She's nothing but a fucking whore!" he snapped, having gained the attention of some of the other 'bots in the park.  
Shaking his helm, he slumped himself onto the bench seat. "Just go. Just go like the rest of them. I'm not what you want to be friends with. I'm nothing but filth to this world. A cold sparked sinner," he said, his optics lowering. "I don't blame you for walking away. I'm… I'm used to it now."

Watching the mech, Char felt her spark sink a little in her chest. His home life was that bad? But it wasn't his fault. She knew that. She would never think he was a monster simply because of what his parents did. If anything, she detested them for causing such hurt to him. It was horrible! How dare they hit and treat their child so disgracefully!?  
Lifting her hand, she placed it softly onto his shoulder before moving down onto the seat to sit beside him. "I'm not going to walk away," she said, smiling lightly as he looked up in surprise, as well as confusion. "I said I liked you, Megatron, and I wanted to be your friend. I don't care who your parents are. You're not them. They sound… horrible, I do admit, but… you're too kind to be like them," she stated, her optics looking into his.

"But… I'm nothing but a sin to this place," said Megatron, feeling his spark go tight at the thought of his mother calling him nothing but filthy names. "I swear, I… do bad things… I like gore…" he stated, furrowing his brow as he waited for her to get up and walk away.

Char simply laughed. "Megatron, you're a teenage mech. What do you expect?" she asked, giving another laugh. "In a solar-cycles time, I'll be doing all those cliché femme things that teenagers do, too. Stop worrying so much."

Looking into Char's optics, Megatron was confused, but he nodded. His extent was different to what she was thinking. Yes, he was a teenager, but the things he did and liked? That wasn't something that a teenager should like. It was nothing but sick and vile. And he liked it. He wished and prayed to Primus that he wasn't the way he was, but he couldn't change—even if he tried to over and over again. Then again, maybe he just hadn't been given the right kind of motivation _to_ change. Char could be that motivation. Char could help him become a better mech…  
"You still want to be my friend?" he asked, looking up to her cerulean optics. Primus, they were so pretty. Those lips, so soft looking. She may not have kicked into her full gear teenager systems yet, but in a few more lunar-cycles, he had a feeling she would be blooming as beautiful as ever.

Giving a grin, the smaller femme stood up and nodded. "Of course I do. Now, how about a picnic?" she asked, picking up the box and shoving it into the mech's lap.

Looking down at the basket-like box, Megatron smiled, smelling the food that was inside it. He'd never gone on a picnic before, but he figured Char was the best option to be his first, right?

*****  
After saying goodbye to Char, Megatron had walked back home. The 'picnic' had been great, and he had learnt a lot about her. She had formally come from Iacon, which was a much nicer part of Cybertron, and he knew was mostly government owned and run. It was basically the top state of Cybertron, but not the prettiest. That would have to be given to Crystal City. Still, it was much nicer than Kaon was.  
Char had told him that they had moved due to her father's work and being transferred here. It was the highest industrial state, so he could see why they had to make the move. She told him that she missed her old friends, but they were still talking over the computer and getting along. He never really knew what it was like to 'miss' someone, but for the first time, he was beginning to know what it felt like.  
Char was a wonderful femme. She was friendly, polite, sweet, funny and smart. She was everything a friend could ask for. It may have only still been their first real day on meeting each other, but he felt like he had known her for solar-cycles. He didn't know how, all he knew was that he felt close to her, and that he wanted to spend time with her again and again. It was a shame that she was in a lower year, though. He would have enjoyed sharing classes with her.  
Making his way up the stairs, he took out the keys in his bag and opened the already broken door, pushing it aside. Of course, his parents had given him keys a long time back. He had never been given a ride to school, he was to always walk there and back home. And if his mother and father weren't there, well then he'd have no way of getting inside the house—the one simple courtesy they had provided him with.  
Closing it slowly, he heard the television going off in the other room, his father sitting in the living room with a bottle of high-grade beside him. He could smell it, that tangy scent that made his head spin a little. He'd had a few drinks here and there of the stuff, but he couldn't say he liked it. However, when it had made him forget his pain and misery, then he had liked it—a lot. The spewing afterwards was something else, though. Still, he'd snag a cube whenever he could, just to get that buzz going.

Hearing the door, Angra walked out of the kitchen, seeing the youngling and walking over to him to take his bag. "You're home, baby. How was school?" she asked, running her fingers against the side of his helm.  
Ever since he had been getting into daily trouble, she'd been worried about Megatron's mental condition. She knew Gammaray was a free councillor, and she thanked Primus for that. She also thanked Primus that he was so kind and charming. She just hoped he could fix whatever the hell was wrong with her son.

Swallowing hard, Megatron felt his spark thump hard inside his chest. How he wanted to throw her fingers off him and snap them. But how he loved and wanted her praise, as well. However, he wasn't as weak as he once had been. He was beginning to grow up, and he realised now that just what his mother was. Compared to Char? She was nothing but dirt and soot. However, he couldn't tell her about the femme. She'd get nasty, and quick, too.  
"It was alright," he said, moving away from her to walk into the kitchen and grab a cube of energon. He wasn't that hungry, considering he had eaten what Char had brought with her, but he had to make sure his mother thought he was needy for energon.

"You smell different," said the femme, giving the youngling an odd look. "It's something feminine. Have you been seeing someone?" she asked, leaning down and taking the cube from her son, smacking it onto the bench. "What have I told you about being a mech, Megatron? Femmes _won't_ put up with it! The only femme you need in your life is me, baby. I'm the only one that can make you right, and feel loved more than anything."

Taking a step back, Megatron shook his head. "No, I promise…" he said, his optics arching. "I was just in detention. It-it must be the guardian's perfume…"

"What's all this racket? I'm tryin' to watch the news," said Puncture, walking into the kitchen to have Angra grab his shoulder and Megatron's and force them together. "What the bloody hell are you doin', femme?" Of course, he was already drunk. He usually was these days. Having Megatron as a son? It was a fucking disgrace.

"Smell him. He's lying!" said Angra, her pale optics narrowing hard. "He's been seeing someone. A femme. I can see it in your optics, Megsy. Stop lying to your mother!" she cried, desperation in her voice.

Shoving himself away from his son and bonded, Puncture shook his head. "Primus, who the hell cares who he hangs out with? At least he's socialisin', right?" he said, looking to the younger mech who seemed to sink into his shoulders with embarrassment.  
"Oh, it is a femme… Good on ya, boy!" he said, smacking the youngling hard on the back. "Just don't fuck it up like your old mech did, okay?" he whispered, giving a dark grin. "Gotta show 'em who's boss in the relationship, otherwise they walk all over ya."

Hearing a hiss, Megatron's optics arched once more as he turned to his mother, Puncture quickly leaving the room before he got into more trouble. "I swear, Mother… I'm not. I wouldn't!" he lied, breathing hard as he saw the possessive look in her optics.

"If I find out you're lying to me, Megatronus, I'll make sure you regret it. Primus doesn't help those who lie," she said, walking out of the room.

Hearing that name, Megatron's optics lowered, knowing she was being completely serious about this. "Yes, ma'am," he murmured before she walked out of the kitchen and joined Puncture in the lounge. He, however, grabbed his bag and walked upstairs to his room.  
Throwing his bag onto his berth, he gave a growl as he kicked it in pure frustration. He didn't know how much longer he could take this. And if his mother ever found out about Char? He'd be in deep shit. Hell, they were just friends! It wasn't like they were lovers or anything…  
**'Oh, but how you wish you were,'** said a darker voice, making him wince as his hands grasped the sheets on the berth. No, it wasn't true! He had just met her! How could he possibly think anything sexual of her? Fuck, she was just a kid! _He_ was just a kid! But why was his spark pulsing so hard for her…?  
**'Oh, it's not just your spark, dear boy. It's something else, too. Just think of that pretty neck against your lips, or even better, inside your hands as you fuck her from behind, making her scream and cry your name as you pound so hard you shatter her protoform.'**  
Swallowing hard, Megatron's lips parted, his frame shaking as the images flickered behind his optics. She was so gorgeous. She was so… _forsaken_. And that's when he realised he was hot for her once more, the snake between his legs standing up.  
Looking to the door, he placed his hands over his face, silently screaming for it to stop. "I won't… I can't… Not to Char. Please, no," he whispered to himself, getting down on his knees. "Please, Primus… I beg of you! Don't make me fall again!" he wept shoving his pillow over the back of his helm as nothing changed. Just a sign! Just one, simple sign to help him!  
Nothing.  
Giving a growl, he threw the pillow and bared his teeth. "Bastard fuck!" he yelled, flipping off at the ceiling, as if to say 'fuck you' to his God. What God? Primus was nothing but a fake fucking shit who his mother worshipped on a daily basis. Yeah, well, look at how far she had come for praying to him! Nowhere! She was stuck in a house with what she hated most! Such a fucking paradise! Not!  
Breathing hard, he walked over to his door, locking it before moving the chair to his computer out of the way. No, he wouldn't succumb to Char, but he could succumb to something else. And turning the monitor on, he typed into the keys, giving a soft whimper as he saw the violence move on the screen.  
"Huhn…" he moaned, unclipping himself and tossing his cod-piece away, pumping his hand up and down the throbbing cable. Yes, how he loved watching when they were thrown against the wall and fucked like dogs. Primus, it was the hottest thing he had ever seen, watching them scream beneath a mech twice the size of them, bound in chains and leather, oil dripping over their bruised forms.  
**'Come on, Megatron, call out her name! You sick pussy! Call it out like the mech you are! Do it for me! Make her scream in your fucked up fantasies while you make Primus watch you defecate him!'**  
Panting, the youngling stiffened as his jaw locked, giving a choked moan as he felt his body convulse hard, lubricant spilling all over the floor in front of him. "Uhh… fuck! Ohh..." he breathed, placing his hands onto the desk in front of him as the last of his lubricant dripped idly from his softening cable.  
Looking at the mess below him, he caught his breathe, leaning down to wipe it up with his berthsheet—simply because he had nothing else in here to wipe it with. It wasn't like it wasn't stained with the stuff anyway. He woke up from wet dreams all the time, not to mention the fluids that leaked when his mother molested him.  
At the thought, he stopped, feeling his body stiffen. He didn't enjoy it, but it wasn't his fault with the way his body reacted. He didn't mean to like his cable getting touched. He didn't even like the fact that he enjoyed masturbating—even though he was taught in class that it was perfectly normal. But his mother?  
Breathing heavily, he felt saliva glaze his tongue, and he knew what was coming—pushing himself up and running to the bathroom down the hall as he threw up. The food that he had eaten from Char covered the bowl in a pale purple, making him choke a few times before he was done.  
Leaning on the bowl, he bit his jaw down, rubbing his hand over his face. Primus, when would it all stop? When would he be free of this!? He hated every moment of that femme looking at him, let alone touching him in such an area.  
"I'm so sorry," he whispered, placing his hands together. "Please forgive me. Please help me! I can't do this anymore…" he choked, feeling a warm tear run down his cheek as he began to weep. Why wouldn't he listen? Why wouldn't he help? He was supposed to guide him, but all he did was ignore him and allow this suffering to go on.  
Wiping his mouth down, he looked into the bowl of the toilet, watching as the violet began to sit still. Violet, just like Char. Maybe she was the key. Maybe she was the key to his happiness, and to the end of his suffering. Maybe it was her he should be looking to, and not Primus.  
Leaning up, he flushed the toilet and washed his hands and face. Luckily, his mother and father were still downstairs, and he could freely walk back to his room to grab his cod-piece and cover himself up. He'd have a shower, and then he'd sneak out. He didn't care how much he'd be in trouble anymore. He wanted to see Char, and he would. It was worth it.

**Author's comment:**

****The first real play date Megatron and Char had. Also, you can probably already tell just how much of an affect Char has on the young Megatron. He's becoming attached quite quickly, but considering she's the only person to give him the attention and care he needs, it's really not that surprising.

Of course, you get to properly meet Statik and Ryde, Char's parents. You all know Statik from my previous in future stories, but here's a glance of her character before the loss of her daughter and partner. You can certainly see she's more at home here, rather than her erratic behaviour in the previous fics.

And of course, you get to see more of Angra and Puncture. There will be more of these guys in the future of this fic. And you can see just how possessive Angra is of her son. Of course, she has her 'reasons' to which she thinks is proper. More of her actions will be explored in the following chapter. Which isn't for the light hearted.


	3. Chapter 3

Part III.

**Warning: This chapter contains sexual themes, child abuse, dark religious themes and mentions of molestation. **

In her room, Char was packing up her school data-pads for tomorrow, placing them into her schoolbag. It was early evening, and dinner time was just around the corner. She had highly enjoyed her afternoon with Megatron, and she liked getting to know him better. However, she flinched as she heard something tap on her window, making her turn around and look down to the bottom floor.  
Pushing the window open, she gave a worried look. "Megatron? What are you doing here?" she whispered so no one could hear her from downstairs. She couldn't be too soft, though, considering the mech was down on the bottom floor in her backyard. How the hell had he even made it to her house…? She never gave him her address.

Dropping the pebbles that were in his hand, the silver mech looked up and gave a smile. "I enjoyed our time today so much that I wanted to see you again," he said, trying to hide the fact that he just couldn't stand being in that house with his mother and father. He knew when he got back he'd be in a lot of trouble, and he knew what would happen afterwards, too.

Giving a soft blush, Char looked further down outside. "My parents will freak if they know you're out there," she whispered, shaking her head as she watched his optics lower in an apology. How could she say no to that face? He was so cute when he wanted to be.  
"Come on… climb up," she said, watching his optics brighten. She took a step back from the window as she heard him climbing up as silently as he could, stepping inside the window. She closed it once he was in, just so their voices wouldn't be heard from downstairs. Thank Primus her door was already closed.  
"Are you alright? You seem a bit shaken," she said, noticing his shaken form. "Here, I'll get you a blanket, I know it's cold out there," she said, walking into her ensuite and grabbing one of the towels that were inside.

Looking around the room, Megatron had to cringe at just how feminine it was up here. Primus, was this her mother's doing? It was pink inside the room, and he gave a bit of a snort when he saw the jewellery box on the mirror stand.  
Walking over to it, he placed a finger to it, lifting the lid, though taking a step back as it played music. He wasn't expecting that. Why would a box play music?

Giggling at the reaction, Char moved in closer, placing the towel around his shoulder. "My grandmother gave it to me. Well, she gave it to my mum, who passed it down to me. She said it's very old… She used to put me to stasis with it when I was just a sparkling," she said, her voice soft.

Feeling the warm hands against him, Megatron's body went rigid as he swallowed hard, listening to the music that was coming from the box. "You… like music?" he asked, though feeling himself lean back into her touch. Oh, Primus, it was so sweet. How he wanted to turn around and just…  
**'Fuck her?'**  
Flinching, he turned around, shaking his head for a moment. No, he didn't want to hurt her like that! He just… he just wanted to lay with her. In the berth, on the floor. It didn't matter. Her touch was like an angel to him. She was everything light in such a dark world.

Watching the mech, Char let her hands go back to herself. "Are you sure you're okay?" she asked, giving a genuinely worried look to him. "I didn't make you feel uncomfortable, did I?" She didn't want to keep touching him and making him flinch if that were the case.

Ignoring the voice, Megatron put his hand up as if it were nothing. "No, I just… I didn't realise how nice your house was," he said. "Which, by the way, I looked up in the phonebook because I didn't know where you lived. But don't think I'm some weirdo or anything, I just… I really wanted to see you," he said all too quickly, not wanting to make her feel awkward. "I swear I didn't follow you home or anything."

Giving a soft smile, Char shook her head. "I think it's kinda sweet," she said, her optics flashing for a moment. "Sit down, I'll get you a warm mug of energon from downstairs, okay?"

As the femme walked out of the room, Megatron was about to stand, worried that someone else may come in here. However, she was gone too quickly, and instead, he simply stood awkwardly, the music box still playing.  
The sound wasn't something that he would usually listen to, however, it was something that was a basic tune, something that he knew was comforting and warm to anyone who would listen to it. At the thought of her sleeping to this, he gave a small smile, sitting himself onto the end of her berth and removing the towel that had given him. It was warm inside; there wasn't any need for it, really.  
Placing his hands onto his knees, he took in everything that was inside the room. It may have been feminine, but it was still a very worthy bedroom. How could he ever show her his house after seeing such a palace here? It was disgusting compared to this place. Here, the walls were bright, fresh, with such homey equipment inside. His house? It was falling to pieces for Primus' sake.  
Lowering his optics, he simply gave a soft breath, listening as the music box continued, playing over and over again. He thought it would have annoyed him, but it didn't. How could it? A soft, sweet sound like that? And that's when he realised his fingers were beginning to follow the melody.  
"You better not fill yourself up before dinner," he heard a feminine voice say as the door opened back up, Char walking in. He stood back up, not wanting to be invasive at the fact that he was sitting on her berth.

Closing the door, Char shook her head as she had the large mug in her hand. "Mum doesn't know you're here, so don't do anything rash. She'd kill me if she knew I had a mech in my room," she said, feeling a little guilty about having to hide things from her mother.

"Please don't tell her I'm here," said Megatron, taking the mug as she offered it to him. "I… I'd love to meet your parents one day, but I'm… I'm ashamed of myself," he said, lowering his optics. "I'm not comfortable around parental figures. It's personal, I know, and I doubt your parents would hurt me like my own, but… I need that space," he said. "I'm not ready."

Nudging him to sit down, Char nodded softly. "It's okay, I won't do anything to make you feel awkward. I promise," she said sweetly, sitting herself beside him as he took a sip of the drink. "How is it?"

Swallowing a small quantity of the warm liquid, Megatron felt it warm down the back of his throat, down into his belly. "It's… like nothing I've ever had before," he admitted, giving a smile. "Thank you. You didn't have to."

"it's not a problem," said the femme. How could she say no so something so simple when she now knew what Megatron's home life was like? No, she didn't know the full extent, and certainly not the fact that his mother was molesting him, but she knew enough to know that Megatron feared going back there. She'd allow him inside her room as much as he wanted to escape that place. No mech deserved such horrors.  
"Is… everything okay at home?" she asked, watching as the mech gave her an awkward look. She didn't know the mech was under therapy. In fact, she still didn't even know the school had a councillor. She was just being friendly, and hoping he hadn't been hit by his father or something.

Putting the mug into his lap, Megatron simply nodded. "It's fine," he answered, not wanting to get into the details. However, he didn't exactly want Char popping over any time soon, did he? He didn't want to give her the wrong idea of his parents being kind to femmes coming over—or any friend for that matter. Plus, he never wanted to let her inside when his mother could be fucking some stranger on the couch.  
"I wish I had some place nice I could show you, like this wonderful house you have. But… my mother would kill me if she knew I'd invited a femme over, and my father is just vial. He'd have something to say no doubt, in his drunken state."

With optics arching, Char felt sorry for the mech. So his father was a high-grade drinker? And clearly on a regular basis for him to be constantly beating the youngling. But what was so wrong about his mother? Family was supposed to be something you cherished, not something you ran from.  
"Why would they care?" she asked. "We're just friends, Megatron. Why won't they let you have friends? I'd never hurt you, or-or them. I'd be polite as ever. You know that."

Giving a small laugh, Megatron shook his head, for once, feeling calm about expressing his home life. He didn't know why, but he just felt like she wouldn't, and wasn't, going to judge him by it—unlike Gammaray.  
"Believe me, they wouldn't even care if you were polite. My mother is just very… possessive of me," he stated. "Like… very possessive. She hates mechs, and she'd hate that I had a femme friend. As I said, she's just very possessive of me. I'm her 'little mech'," he said, putting his fingers in inverted commas.

Char couldn't help but give a giggle as he mimicked her voice. "I'm sorry about your parents, but as long as you're here, I can look out for you," she said, her lips creasing into a kind smile. "Parents can be dorks sometimes, but deep down, they do love you."

Not his parents, or at least Megatron certainly couldn't feel the love, besides his mother's fucked up way of showing him affection. He didn't fight it, though, he didn't want to get into an argument with her—or worse, hurt her feelings.  
"I guess," he said, lowering his optics as he heard the music box still playing in the background. "So, you never answered my question. Do you like music?" he asked again, hoping to get off the subject of his parents.

Looking to the box, Char gave a light shrug. "I like classical," she stated, looking back to him. "I'm not really into that new age stuff, it's a bit too…"

"Sexist?" finished Megatron, giving a small smile. Indeed, the shit they played on the radio was garbage compared to what it once was. "All that talk of hoes and bitches? It doesn't leave much to the imagination, does it?"

Char gave another light laugh at how open he was. "Yep, that's pretty much it," she said, giving a light grin. "Why do you ask?"

The future Decepticon ruler gave a simple shrug. "No reason, I… just wanted to know," he said, feeling himself heat up a little in the cheeks.

"Oh, don't you lie to me, Megatron," said the femme, giving a smile as she pushed his arm, making him laugh. "What are you hiding?"

Rubbing his arm, Megatron lowered his optics rather coyly. "I just… Well, I play piano. Well, I've been learning, anyway. I can't say I'm the best," he said, averting his optics as he felt himself blush heavily—something that he rarely did.

"Oh, wow! You so have to play for me one time!" exclaimed the femme, giving a wide grin. "When did you start learning?" This mech was just full of surprises. Piano? Really? Primus, she never would have guessed he could play something as gentle as the piano.

"I started learning a few lunar-cycles ago, when I-" He stopped, realising that he was about to blurt out the fact that he had a therapist. No, he couldn't tell her. But she was so sweet. She hadn't judged him on his parents, so why would she judge him by having a psychiatrist helping him? If anything, she'd probably understand more than anyone else had.

"What is it?" asked the femme, looking concerned as he went silent. Was there something even worse that was happening in his life, too?

"Um… I'm seeing a councillor…" he said, looking back up. "He was the one who saw I had some kind of talent, and pushed me to start playing. Ever since, I've been using the music room in school to practice. I've pretty much taught myself from thereon," he explained. "Please don't think any less of me because the school directed me to have sessions."

"Why would I think any less of you?" she asked, placing her hand onto his arm. "I think it's good for you to be seeing someone and talking about your family problems. It's never good for these things to be kept in, Megatron. My mum and dad are as open as ever, and that's what makes us such a happy family. Keeping it all in? It'll drive a mech crazy, Megatron," she said, worry in her voice once more. She didn't want him to simply explode one day. "I think you're stronger for doing so."

Parting his lips, it wasn't exactly the reaction he was expecting. But he didn't trust Gammaray like he trusted her. He didn't even know why or how he was trusting her so quickly, but he was. He could feel it in her that she wouldn't betray him like everyone else had. She'd proved that to him already. But Gammaray? He probably went back to the other councillors and laughed at him behind his back!

"Please don't keep it in," repeated the femme, her optics arching as she gripped him tighter on the arm.

Feeling her hand, Megatron's optics lowered to her worried grasp. She really did care. "Okay, I won't," he said, giving a smile. He didn't know if he could keep that, and it's why he didn't promise her. But he'd try at least. "I'll try."

Smiling, Char rubbed his shoulder before standing back up. "It's all I ask for."

Watching her, he took another sip of the warm energon in his hands, his spark warming at the fact of how much care she showed him. And he could feel it again, that thumping, floating sensation inside the middle of his core. Maybe his darker side was right. Maybe he did want her. But he'd never hurt her like he wanted to. He simply couldn't.  
"Char?" came a voice, making the both of them look at one another as they heard footsteps coming up the stairs. Shit, he had to get out of here. If her mother saw him, she'd probably freak and then they'd never be able to talk again.

"Get under the berth!" whispered Char, grabbing the mug and putting it onto the stand in her room, throwing the towel into the bathroom as Megatron pushed himself up and slipped himself beneath the berth as quickly as he could just before the door opened.

Seeing her daughter, Statik gave a small smile. "Darling, dinner is ready. You don't want it to get cold, do you?" she asked, extending her hand and waiting for her daughter to take it.

"Of course," said the youngling, giving a nervous smile. "I'll just grab my mug and be down in a moment."

"Oh nonsense, you can get that later," said Statik, taking her hand and tugging her gently. "Come on, you can get that later."

Underneath the berth, Megatron could hear his spark thumping inside his audios, his breath shaken as he saw the pedes of the two of them. And then as they began heading down the stairs, he saw Char look back at him, giving him a worried glance. However, he simply let out a breath of air as they were out of sight. He'd have to be getting home anyway. Primus, he was going to be in so much shit…

*****  
"Don't you lie to me!" yelled Angra, backhanding the youngling. "I can smell it on you. That same scent! You've been seeing some femme, you no good, sinning mech-whore!" she yelled, shoving him against the wall.

Panting, Megatron's optics arched, the stinging sensation burning his cheek as her hand slapped across his face. He completely forgot about the towel that Char has wrapped around his shoulders, and it was proving to be a real bitch to him right now—having had her perfume on it.  
"Mother, please!" he begged, though receiving another slap from her, being shoved up the stairs and thrown into the bathroom. He only figured she was going to make him have a shower and clean the smell from himself. Primus, he didn't understand why he wasn't allowed to have friends!

Running the bath water, Angra grabbed her son's arm and threw him into the tub. "Now you wash that filth from you and pray to Primus that he won't condemn you for such evil!" she napped, throwing the sponge at him and taking the small amount of armour he had on off.

Grabbing his arms, Megatron's optics widened as he was completely naked once more in front of her. "I can wash myself, Mother…" he whispered, though hardly audible from his frightened and shamed state. He felt like nothing but dirt. But he didn't sin! He was just talking with Char. He didn't do anything wrong! Why was his mother so possessive of him!?

"No, you can't!" snapped the older femme, grabbing the cleanser and turning the water onto boiling hot, making the sparkling squirm. "Sinners must be washed of their filth!" she said, ignoring her son's pleas that the water was too hot for him to handle.  
"If you weren't so filth ridden like every other mech out there, then I wouldn't have to purify you, would I!?" she asked, grabbing the sponge and rubbing the soap into it to make it white and fluffy. However, her next movements weren't as soft as the soap was promising from first glance. And instead, she grabbed the mech's arm and scrubbed him as hard as possible.

Wincing, Megatron tried to tug away from the pain, the water still burning his body. "Please!" he asked, his optics begging as he tried to blow on the water to cool it down—a feeble attempt to show his mother that it was simply too hot for him to handle.

"Stop it!" she snapped, grabbing him still and scrubbing his back. "Making your poor old mother do this? Do you care for me at all, Megatron? Why must you torment me like this? Night after night!? I've tried teaching you that mechs are no good to be with femmes. Do you want to turn out like your father!? Sitting down there, drunk off his aft every fucking night!?" she asked, her scrubbing getting harder and harder.

With his hands etching into his sides, Megatron simply shook, unable to speak from the pain. He wanted to push her away and run! She was saying it was all his fault. But why? He didn't do anything to Char. His mother didn't even know who she was!  
"Please, Mother…" he whispered, unable to hold back the tears as he felt warm blood dribble down his back from her constant scraping. "I'm sorry… I'm so sorry!" he cried, lifting his hands to his face as he wept into them—his back and body aching.

Stopping, Angra took away the sponge and looked to her sparkling as he cried into his hands, asking for forgiveness. That was her boy. That was the Megatron she wanted to see. She didn't mean to hurt him, but he had to be punished. She wanted her son to join with Primus, and the only way was to cleanse him of his sins—of being a dirty mech like the rest of them.  
"Shh, shh," she whispered softly, cupping some of the water and running it down his back wound. It was a simply graze, but it was enough to draw blood from the force of her scrubbing—and oil was enough of a sacrifice to let her Lord know that her son was cleansed for his day of sins.

Wincing as the warm water hit him, Megatron tried to push back the tears, swallowing hard as he curled into a tight ball so she couldn't touch him anymore. "I'm sorry, Mother. I'm sorry, Primus. Please… please forgive my sins," he chanted, knowing it would make his mother happy, and yet, it simply becoming a habit from being forced into such things. He really did want forgiveness, though. It wasn't just an act. He truly believed that he was to be punished for his sins.

"Come, now, baby," cooed Angra, taking the sponge and running it gently down his back as she turned the cold water on, levelling out the temperature. "There's a good mech, Megsy. Primus forgives you, baby. Primus loves you, as do I," she said, kissing him on the back of the helm and soothing him as much as she could.

Breathing softly, Megatron felt his body relax as the water levelled out, his optics clenching tight from the sheer pain and suffering of it all. He couldn't take it much more. He couldn't take her hands against him! Her voice in his audios! The mere sight of her! It made him so angry! He just wanted to turn around and choke the fucking life from her worthless hide! And yet… he was simply too weak to.  
Lowering his helm, he parted his lips, wiping away the stray tear that ran down his cheek. "I'm sorry…" he whispered once more, calming himself down. But he knew what was to come next. She did it every time they got into a fight. Or more so every time he got into trouble by her.  
There it was. That warm hand. That motherly hand that was supposed to show nothing but endless love and compassion. But not the way she did things. She did not hold compassion. She did not hold love. Her version of love was something so dark and warped, that it caused her to try and teach him how to become a good mech. To take away his lusty needs.  
Feeling another tear run down his cheek as she parted his thighs gently, he couldn't keep back a small whimper, causing her to shush him gently, like any caring mother would. But this wasn't a caring game. This was a wrong game. This was just fucking sick!

"There's a good boy, Megatron," whispered the femme, rubbing her fingers down the sides of his thigh and cupping the flaccid cable into her hand. "You let Mother take care of your teenage needs, Megatron. Primus can't condemn you when you have no desire left," she murmured in a motherly and sweet tone as she ran her palm against the thickening cord.

Feeling himself sink into his shoulders, Megatron couldn't help the tears that continued to roll down his cheeks. He felt so disgusting! So dirty! How could he get such a reaction from such wickedness!? It was wrong. He didn't like it! He never did! And yet, his body was simply betraying him, and he was even more disgusted as he felt a soft moan escape his throat, making him want to vomit.  
_Please, please let me go away_, he prayed in his mind. _Make her stop! Please make it stop! Make it all stop! I can't do this anymore. Please, Primus. Please hear me. I'm so sorry. For everything! I'll be a good mech, I swear! I swear I'll be a good mech for you! Please make it stop… Please… kill me. _  
**'Who are you fucking kidding!? That bastard isn't listening to you, Megatron! And this cunt will never stop touching you! You want to be molested every fucking solar-cycle of your worthless life!? Stop praying to a false God and stand up like a real mech! I'm sick and tired of being defiled by this bitch! Fucking take her throat and choke the life out of her! Show her who is boss!'**  
Whimpering once more, Megatron grasped the sides of his helm, his head spinning. It was getting worse! Every solar-cycle was worse than the previous. It would never stop. He only had one choice. He'd have to end it all, or worse, let that thing take over. And he wouldn't let that thing get to Char. No way in hell would he let that sick bastard violate her like he wanted to. No, he'd just have to keep her safe from him. Whether that be through death or not.  
Feeling his systems convulse, his jaw dropped. "Uh…!" he moaned, clasping his hand over his mouth as he felt his cable pulse hard, lubricant flowing into the water from beneath the surface. He'd done it again. He'd actually overloaded from it. And Primus, all he could do was feel his skin crawl, as if he were covered in nothing but filth.

"You'll be safe for another solar-cycle, Megsy," whispered Angra, placing her hands into the water and washing them off. "Good boy. Now get yourself cleaned up, dinner is going to be ready," she said, planting a soft, soothing kiss onto the back of his helm before walking out and closing the door.

As he heard the door close, his body shook, unable to stop the tears that rained down his cheeks as he broke down. He couldn't stand it anymore! He never wanted to come back to this place. He never wanted to be in her filthy hands again!  
Grabbing the sponge, he rubbed as much soap into it as he could, scraping it down his body. He didn't care how much it hurt, or that it was scratching up his protoform, anything was better than the filth she had done to him.

**Author's Comment:**

****A darker chapter, especially with Megatron's mother here. I also wanted to show just what Angra thinks about her boy and what he does, as well as how and why Primus would punish him. Basically, she's conditioning him to never want to lust for a femme. And how she does that is by releasing his sexual needs through molestation.


	4. Chapter 4

Part IV.

Having befriended Char for just under a stellar-cycle now, Megatron's feelings for her had only proven to make matters worse. She was constantly on his mind, and even when he was trying to think of something else, she would still push through. His spark yearned for her touch, and even worse, something else yearned for her touch, too. His sexual systems had kicked into full gear—and hard. What used to be a frequent wank in the shower, or his room, had now turned into an obsession whenever he could get the chance to—and that meant in public if need be.  
It was his fourteenth birthday, not that his parents seemed to care. They'd never really celebrated his birthday before, so why would this stellar-cycle be any different, right? He was somewhat thankful that it wasn't a school day. That gave him the chance to get out of the house and get away from his family. Not just that, but Char had asked him to meet her down at one of the lakes in Kaon. It was exciting, but their friendship had certainly grown since they had first met. Suffice to say that that didn't make his nerves go away when he was around the femme.  
Walking down the stairs, he gave a sleepy yawn, though stopping when he could hear his mother and father talking in the living-room. Why on Cybertron were they up so early? Hell, it was the weekend, he figured they'd be sharing the berth together or something horrible. Either that or a fight. However, they seemed to be talking quietly. Great… this was about him, wasn't it?  
Taking the last step, he turned and walked into the lounge-room, his optics looking to the large object in the centre of the room. What…? But…. why? Why would his mother and father do anything for him now? He didn't understand. Was this some kind of horrible joke, and then they'd lie to him and laugh or something?

"Oh, happy birthday, Megsy," came Angra's voice, the dark femme standing and running to her son, embracing him hard. "I know we don't really celebrate the birth of mechs, but you're starting to grow up, and we thought we'd get you something this solar-cycle around," she said, giving him a soft kiss on the helm.

"More like we just figured you'd be hittin' that teenage stage where you don' wanna be hangin' 'round us an' all. Plus, this'll give ya somethin' to practice on. Happy birthday, son," said Puncture, taking the dark hand and shaking it hard, Megatron seeming nothing but stunned.

"You… got me a piano?" asked the younger mech, his optics still dazed as he looked to the torn material. So it wasn't brand new, he knew that much, but still. They'd never given him anything before… This was the first time he'd had somewhat of a real birthday, and it felt… wonderful. Strange, but wonderful. He was torn between wanting to stay and flee.  
"I don't know what to say," he said, looking up to his mother, who nudged him over to the instrument. "Thank you… Mother, Father, thank you so much," he said, giving a wide grin as he walked over to it and placed a finger to one of the stained pieces of ivory.

"Now, now, it'll be goin' up in your room, 'cause it'll be loud, alright?" said Puncture, walking over. "You're becomin' a real mech now, so you'll hafta help your old mech get it up the stairs before you can play it, okay?"

"Anything…" said Megatron, his optics lighting up as he gave another wide grin, his fangs really beginning to show now. "Thank you!" he almost yelled, hugging his father, Angra moving into the small family hug. It was the first time he had ever truly felt like he was part of a family. The first time he'd actually received a proper birthday gift. He didn't care that it was old and had probably been picked up off the side of the road. It was his now. And both his parents had given it to him. For once, he felt his spark thump in thanks to them. Even if he knew it wouldn't last.

*****  
"Really? That's wonderful!" exclaimed Char, giving a grin as she hugged the silver mech across from her. Through their solar-cycle of friendship, she'd learnt to love the mech in her own special way. He'd certainly grown since they first met, but so had she. She was beginning to develop more shape in her slick form, just from her femme genes—which were proving to be quite strong from her mother's side. She had grown only a little in height, though, but her voice had developed into a nice feminine sound, as had Megatron's grown into a more mech-sound, much deeper than it once was. He was still quite thin, though, but that was probably because he wasn't taking the time to work his cybernetic muscle up into bulk like most of the teenage mechs were these days. She liked that in him, though. He never seemed to care what other 'bots were doing. He was simply himself. And that was perfect.

"I honestly wasn't expecting it," said the mech, though giving a shrug. "No birthday cake or anything, but hell, I'll take a piano over that any day," he said, giving a light laugh, his sharp denta exposed for a moment.

"Well, I hope my gift isn't a letdown, then," said the femme, giving a soft smile as they sat on the edge of the lake. She had brought a basket of her mother's cooking; having told her mother that it was Megatron's birthday. Of course, by now, both of her parents knew she had befriended the mech. She had explained to them that he was nervous around parental figures, though, so she still saw him in her room in private, and that meant Megatron had never personally met her parents—and probably never would. It was a strange relationship, because of all the secrecy from both families, but they preferred it that way—or more so Megatron did, anyway. He had said it would be better this way.  
She believed him.

Looking up, Megatron's pallid lips parted. "What…? Char, you didn't have to…" he said, his optics arching as his spark thumped hard inside his chest. She simply blushed, though, handing him a small box.

"It's not much, Megatron, but I figured you'd enjoy some proper materials," she said, giving a soft smile as he opened the box up and looked inside.

Looking inside, Megatron took out the utensils. "You…" He couldn't form words. She'd given him more than his parents ever could when it came to the subject. And moving forward, he gave her a tight hug, the both of them still sitting in the synthetic grass. "Thank you…" he murmured, holding her tightly. "It's the best thing I've ever gotten…"

"I thought the pad suited your optics," giggled the femme, though not expecting the mech to lean over and grab her into a tight hug. "You're welcome. I know how much you enjoy drawing, and these are great products. Some of the best to help you exceed your talent," she laughed, her light optics dimming as she felt his pacing spark beat against her.

Pulling out of the hug, Megatron smiled. They really were the best products, and certainly something his parents would never buy for him. He held onto the dark red pad tightly before putting it softly back into the case, as if not wanting to get a single scratch on it.  
"This has, by far, been the best birthday ever," he said, looking up to the cerulean optics and giving a nervous smile. "Not because of the gifts, though," he said, taking her hand into his own shaking one. How he wanted to tell her how he really felt. That his spark wanted to be with hers. That he… _loved_ her. "But… because I got to spend it with you…"

Char blushed, her optics lowering coyly. "You're too kind, Megatron," she whispered, letting him hold her hand in his own two. They were smooth, which never failed to surprise her with how rough he was in his life. And yet, they were perfectly smooth against her own metal. She couldn't help but blush even further.

"Char… I…" he started, giving a hard swallow. How he wanted to gently lay her into the astro-turf and kiss her. How he wanted his hands to glide down her silky body. Primus, the mere thought of it was making his blood boil.

Looking back up, Char watched the vermillion optics as they seemed nervous. "M-Megatron?" she asked, though the both of them flinching when they heard her name being called out, her other group of friends making their way over.  
She let her hands go from Megatron's, running one of them up her arm as she looked back to the silver mech. They treated him horribly, she knew. She sometimes didn't know why she had befriended them, but they had accepted her into their group in school. Sure, they could be jerks (which was most of the time), but they were good at spark. Or so she'd like to see, anyway.

Megatron's jaw went tight as he heard one of the mechs say something to the femme about them being here. That fucker had just completely ruined the moment! Just when he was about to tell her what he really felt for her. She had to feel the same, right? She was much too kind to reject him… He saw it in her optics. She cared more for him than his own mother did. She had to love him back!

"Psycho alert," said one of the mechs, nudging the other mech beside him. "What are you doing here with this pile of scrap? I thought you were coming with us to Kaon Village," he said, speaking about the massive shopping centre that was a few blocks down from the school.

Char tensed, looking back to the silver mech who had his optics on the floor, his hands tight on his thighs. "Come on, guys, it's only early. Can't we go later? It's his birthday," she said, looking up at the group that consisted of two mechs and three femmes (not including her).

"Aww, it's Megatwon's birfday," mimicked the second mech. "What, you have no friends your own age so you have to hang with someone below your grade? Primus, what a loser," he laughed, the femmes beside him snickering and grabbing at Char's arm to make her go with them.

At hearing the insult, Megatron's fangs bared, though feeling a soft hand on his arm as Char leant forward.

"It's not with it, Megatron," she said softly. "I'll… I'll see you later, okay?" she said, giving a polite smile as she stood up. "You can have the energon. I'll get the basket from you later," she spoke, giving an apologetic look to the mech as he looked back up.

What!? She was really going to leave? With these morons!? Standing, he said, "Wait." However, he swallowed hard when the group turned back around and looked at him. He wasn't scared of them. No, he didn't care what they thought of him. He was used to others calling him worthless named and the sort. He just didn't understand why she was friends with such scum! Was she ashamed of being seen with him in public? But… he loved her. He wanted to be with her!

Stopping, Char arched her optics as she looked to the taller mech. "Megatron, please," she said, not wanting anything bad to happen between both of her friends.

"Yeah, fuck off, Megatron," said the larger mech of the two. "Can't you see you don't have a chance? Why don't you go back to mummy? At least she'd be willing to suck you off for a shanix," he laughed, grinning as he saw the larger mech tense.

**'Kill him… Kill him and his worthless friends. They're nothing but piss on Cybertron's hide. Take his neck and strangle the worthless bitch. Then you can take your prize and fuck her. Tell her how you really feel. Tell her that you want in her tight, virgin valve while they all watch you ****_rape_**** her! Just like your mother rapes you every fucking night!'**  
With optics glowing, Megatron grinned, his sharp denta showing. "You want to run that by me again?" he asked, looking back up to the mech as all he could see was blood covering them all. How he wanted so much to tear them apart. Tear their limbs off while they were still living. Slice them into little pieces and fuck every orifice he could. He'd prove his mech-hood that way.  
In the last solar-cycle, his condition had hit its peak now. It was the worst it had been since he was born, and almost every second of the day he could feel the monster inside of him taking over. Yes, he heard it talk to him, but now he was having external arguments with himself as well—not just inside his head. Now, he was becoming the mech inside his head. That bloodthirsty murderer. And all he wanted was to see that beautiful gore splattered across them all.

Folding his arms, the mech grinned, though uncertain to what to do now. The look on the other mech's face seemed demonic, as if he were playing every murder fantasy in his head over and over again. "You heard me, freak… Go back to your mumma. Mumma's boy!"

**'Do it… NOW!'** And as if ordered, Megatron leapt forward, his hands pushing the mech onto the floor. He sat on him, lifted his left fist up and smacked it solidly into the mech's face. However, within a second, he was picked up from the other mech, thrown onto the ground and kicked hard on the stomach.

"Stop it!" yelled Char, the other femmes having taken a step back as the three mechs fought. Megatron was on the floor now, both mechs holding him down and hitting him in any place they could. Her spark was thumping, but she didn't know what to do but yell over and over again for them to stop.

"Fucking slag!" yelled the mech who had been punched across the face, oil now smeared across his cheek and lip. "How do you like it, huh!?" he yelled, continuously smacking the older mech across the face with his knuckles—his friend holding Megatron down.

"_Stop it!_" repeated Char, this time running in and throwing the two mechs from Megatron—who had stopped fighting back the moment she had told them to stop. He was covered in oil now, thick strands smothering his lips and nose. There were clear dents in his armour, but it was nothing that couldn't be fixed with a hammer.  
"Megatron… Primus, are you okay?" she asked, the silver mech pushing himself onto his hands and breathing hard, wiping down his lips as blood dripped from his chin. "He wasn't fighting back!" she yelled to the other two, both of them panting just as hard as the silver mech.

"He started it!" yelled the wounded 'bot, his friend beside him, knuckles covered in oil. "Come on, let's go. Leave that dirty thing here. Let him crawl back to his mother," he said, turning his back and beginning to walk back towards where they had come from.

The femmes grabbed Char, ushering her away from the fallen mech, oil now staining the grass. "Come on, Char. If someone sees you here, you'll get into a lot of trouble," said one of them.

Char tried to fight back, but they took a tight hold of her, and once more, she gave Megatron an apologetic look as she was dragged away by her friends.

Panting, Megatron's jaw went tight, though spitting the oil from his mouth. He was bruised badly, but it was all worth it simply to punch that bastard fuck in the face. He still didn't understand how she could be friends with mechs like that, though. How could she simply walk away with them after what they had done to him? He had stopped the moment she had said so. He had taken that order—for her! And she still _left him!?_  
He looked up as he heard the footsteps of the still standing mech, making his optics go towards him, narrowing hard as he walked over to the basket and towel that was sitting on the lakes edge.

"Ever come near Char again, you're fucking dead," said the mech, kicking the basket into the lake so it was drenched and the energon couldn't be eaten. And leaning down, he picked up the pad that had been given to the silver mech from Char.  
"Let this be your only warning…" he said, putting it back onto the floor and lifting his foot.

"No!" yelled Megatron, though wincing hard as he heard the pede crush against the pad, it being completely shattered beneath the foot. He pushed the mech over, grabbing the shards desperately. That bastard! That fucking bastard! He broke it! It was completely worthless now!

Giving a laugh as he stumbled, the mech grinned, kicking the other once more while he was down on all fours. "Stay the hell away from her," he ordered, spitting on the mech before turning and catching back up to his friends.

With a tear running down his cheek, Megatron grabbed the shards, his other hand holding his burning stomach to where the mech had just kicked him. And with fists tight, he gave a yell, smacking it into the turf. "You fucking bastard…!" he wept, scooping the pieces up into his hands and curling into a ball.  
He wanted them to pay! He wanted them to die! He wanted to see them being tortured while they all screamed for mercy under his hands. But how could he? He was nothing compared to them. It didn't matter how kind he was to Char, she'd always choose them over him. But why? Why would she show so much love for him and then simply turn her back on him? Would it make a difference if she knew his feelings? Surely it would! Surely she'd finally stay with him and love him, too.  
Leaning up, he wiped the back of his hand over his tear-streaked face, looking down to the now shattered mosaic beneath him. The one true present he could cherish, and from the femme he loved so dearly? It was gone… Just shattered pieces of circuitry now.  
Picking himself up, he spat another amount of oil from his mouth before moving down to the water's edge and cupping it into his hands. He simply put it in his mouth and washed it out.  
He'd pick up the pieces of the pad that Char had given him, take it back home and try to repair it. She'd want to know what happened to it, and he'd tell her the truth. Why protect such an arse of a mech? He didn't care if he were Char's friend. That bastard deserved her to fucking hate him more than anything! And he would not lie to her.  
Picking up the pieces, he put them in the bag he had brought with him, standing up and moving back towards home. It wasn't a long walk, but considering how hard he had been hit, his frame was aching, especially his mouth—which was still leaking oil from the corner.  
Walking up the steps, he pushed his way inside, stopping as he was about to put a pede on the floor. No. He was dirty. He was bleeding. If he put a dot on the carpet, he'd be in deep shit from his father. Unfortunately, that's whose voice he heard as the mech walked around the corner.

Eyeing the youngling, Puncture's optics narrowed. "What in the bloody hell happened to you?" he asked, looking at the bruised and beaten mech. "Shit, you fall down an' get hit by a car or somethin'?" he asked, grabbing a tea towel from the kitchen and handing it to the youngling. "Watch your pedes," he warmed. "Here, I'll take you out back and spray you down."

Moving out of the way, Megatron followed his father around to the back of the house, where he had a hose attached to the tap near the house. He winced as he was sprayed with the ice-cold liquid, though the blood soon draining off him as Puncture handed him a sponge to remove it.

"Your mother's out, said she had an appointment with that therapist of yours," said the larger mech, his emerald optics rolling as he mentioned Gammaray. That mech was a no good two timing bastard. Helping his son? Yeah, where was the fucking proof of that!?

Megatron simply lowered his optics. He had other things on his mind. He wanted to get upstairs and fix his broken pad—the bag laying on the floor a few astro-metres away so it wouldn't get wet.

"Oi, what's your problem? It's your birthday, boy, shouldn' you be happy?" asked Puncture, turning off the hose and placing a towel over the youngling so he could dry himself.

Feeling the hands on him, something made Megatron snap, making him turn around. "Birthday!?" he yelled, teeth bared. "What do iyou/i care about my birthday!? Not once have you ever cared! Now that Mother's gone out with Gammaray, you talk to me!? Forget it!" he yelled, throwing the towel, though being grabbed back.

"What is your damn problem!?" snapped Puncture, taking the mech's shoulder and spinning him around. "How dare you talk to me with that kinda tone!? I took the time an' effort to try an' give you somethin', an' then you spit back in my face, boy? You wanna be sleepin' out here with the fuckin' dogs!? I put a fuckin' roof over your head, Megatron! I pay for your damn energon! An' you show me this kinda respect?" he asked, slapping the mech across the face.

Dripping wet, Megatron winced as he was struck, his already wounded cheek stinging hard. His optics narrowed, though. "Fuck you…" he whispered, spitting on the mech as blood oozed into his mouth.  
As he watched the mech growl, he smirked, something in his stomach igniting. That feeling. It was pleasure. It was hot, steamy pleasure at seeing that bastard of a fucking mech being insulted beneath him! It made his head spin, a familiar pounding pulsing against the left side of his head. Not to mention making his cable stand against his thigh beneath the plating.

With fists tightening, Puncture growled as he was spat on, lifting his hand and backhanding the youngling, causing him to hit the floor. "You dare fuckin' spit on me!? You worthless, little punk!" he yelled, leaning down and grabbing the back of the mech's helm before spitting on the floor and rubbing his face into it.

Choking, Megatron's hands dug into the floor, trying to push himself up as his face was smeared into the saliva his father had spat onto the ground, reeking of high-grade and what was the Cybertronian equivalent to chewing tobacco.

"You like it!? You like it, you filthy little bitch!?" Puncture yelled, smacking the mech's face into the floor once more before standing. "You wanna act like some kinda animal, then I'll bloody well treat you like one, you filthy pig!" he said, kicking the youngling and hearing him give a grunt. "You can say goodbye to dinner, too. Fuckin' animal," he muttered before walking back inside the house.

Breathing hard, Megatron spat out what had entered his mouth, leaning up onto his hands. "Worthless bastard…!" he whispered, though hearing the door slam shut. It was for the best, though, considering it meant Puncture wouldn't come back out and give him another beating.  
Brushing himself down, he stood back up, knowing he'd have to stay outside for at least a cycle until Puncture would have calmed down enough to let him back inside. It was always the way. Sure, as much as he hated being here, and as much as his mother and father treated him like shit, they'd always take him back. And sometimes it was the most frighting part, especially with his mother.

*****  
Sitting across from the femme, Gammaray gave a small sigh, rubbing the front of his helm. "I'm very sorry, Angra, I just can't see any improvements with Megatron. I've been counselling him for a whole solar-cycle now, and if anything, he's been getting worse. He's more violent, getting into more fights at school… I hear the kids talking about him as if he's nothing but a nut case," he said, concern in his voice for the youngling.

"Is there nothing more you can do for my baby?" asked the femme, genuinely worried for her sparkling. "He's growing up so fast… Soon he'll be leaving home, and… I don't want to hear that he's been killed in a street fight or something," she said, a tear running down her cheek. "I-I try my best with him, Gammaray. I just want my baby to be welcomed by Primus, but the things he does? I fear the worst," she wept, putting her hands over her face.

Frowning, Gammaray placed his hands between his knees, the white coat covering him. "We could try medication, but it's going to be expensive," he said, looking to the dark femme. "It would at least calm his aggression. He's got a deep anger for something, but until I find out what it is, I can't diagnose him correctly. I'm afraid medication will simply supress his feelings even more."

"You know I can't afford medication," said Angra, her optics glistening. "W-what if I can pay a different way?" she asked, sitting up.

Quirking an optic ridge, Gammaray gave a frown. "A different way? I'm not quite sure I follow, Angra," he said, watching as the femme stood up and walked over to him, crouching in front of him. He gasped as he felt her hands go to his thighs, parting them.

"Please, Gammaray… I want my boy to go to the Well of Allsparks. I couldn't live with myself if he were sent to that horrid place so suffer all of his sins," she whispered, looking up needily, biting her bottom lip.

"Mrs. Angra… I…" Gammaray started, his violet optics arching at her sheer desperation. Without the medication, Megatron could become worse. With it, nothing may happen, though. He wasn't sure what was going on in that sparkling's head, all he knew was that he was severely violent, and enjoyed death and blood. Could medication calm that? If he was given the right one to the right diagnosis. However, if it was the wrong kind, severe side effects could happen.

Looking up, Angra licked her lips, her hands sliding further between the mech's now heated thighs. "I know you're a lonely mech, Doctor Gammaray. Let a desperate femme help you. It's a good deed, nothing more. Just a reliever. You must be so stressed…" she whispered, letting her tongue lick the warm thigh.

Breathing sharply, Gammray's optics watched the femme. It had been a long time since he had had any sexual contact. His bond-mate had passed stellar-cycles back, and he was the cause. He should have never agreed to letting her take experimental therapy for her condition. He blamed himself for that, but the femme between his legs wasn't his. She was Puncture's. And Primus knew what happened with those two in a berth. Could the rumours be true? Maybe it was time to experience her lips first hand?  
Letting his hand run down her helm, he watched her as her optics lifted. "One payment," he said, giving a soft smile. "I can give you one cylinder of Pasitus, which is a drug that will calm Megatron's aggression. If it works, there's a few more things I can think of that you could pay me with…" he said, his fingers running up her jaw-line.

"Anything for my Megatron," whispered the femme, spreading his thighs further to take off his cod-piece.

**Author's Comment:**

****I hate kids... The things that go on without parents knowing, it's insane. :/ Unfortunately, there's not much that can be done. Children can be horrible... horrible creatures.

Of course, you get to see one small, happy family moment at the beginning. Megatron's finally got his piano, which is something that can calm him down a lot. 3 It's a simple show of love from his parents, it's just unfortunate that it doesn't last long.

You can also tell that Megatron's starting to become more vocal and violent towards others. He's beginning to listen more to the other half inside his head, and he's beginning to merge into him.

We all know Angra's a whore. Here's her first move on Gammaray-which becomes a regular thing between these two. Of course, Megatron is oblivious to it, and only finds out in his later years in the asylum, right before Gammaray's... final outcome. XD


	5. Chapter 5

Part V.

Looking in the mirror, Megatron ran a hand down the side of his face. It was deeply bruised, a nice, deep black smudge around his optic where he had been hit from Char's 'friend'. There were markings across his cheeks as well, and a nice split across his lip from where his father had re-opened the wound yesterday and made it larger. It had a crust over the top of it, but he knew if he moved it too much it would reopen once more.  
Wincing as he felt his bare protoform's side, he looked down, seeing the other bruises against his body. His armour had been fixed, but the bruising to his actual body was still very much visible. He was just lucky that no one saw his protoform in school. Still, he knew he'd be getting a few looks from the markings covering his face.  
"Megatron, brekky is ready!" came his mother's voice, making him look back to the mirror. Turning the tap on, he ran the water and cupped it in his hands before splashing his face. He may be roughened up, but he still liked being clean. Not that it covered the bruising. And grabbing his armour, he put it back on before heading down the stairs.

Hearing the pede-steps, Angra turned at the sight of the youngling, making her frown. "Aw, baby, I'm so sorry," she whispered, letting her hand go to the back of his helm as he sat down. "How are you feeling this morning?" she asked, having seen the bruising yesterday when she had made it back home. Of course, she didn't tell him what she did with Gammaray, but she had spoken to him about medication—to which he didn't have much choice in.

"It's alright, Mother, I'm fine," said the future Decepticon warlord, moving his head away from her touch. After all, it wasn't like it was the first time he'd been hit around by others. Hell, he feared his father's beatings more than the shit's at school.

Looking up from his paper, Puncture's dark emerald optics looked to his son's vermillion ones. "Well, today you make 'em pay, kiddo. You're makin' me look bad. I didn't raise no femme," he said, going back to reading.

"Yes, sir," said Megatron, picking up his spoon and eating the energon that his mother put in his bowl. Hell, the sooner he ate, the sooner he could get out of here. Not that he had any desire to be in school, but at least he didn't get molested there. Even if it meant having to face Char and her douchebag friends.

"Hey, what have I said about teaching him violence?" said the mother of the family. "My boy hits no one. Primus won't forgive those who hit on others, you got that, Megatron?" she said, returning back to the kitchen sink to clean up the rack of dishes that were sitting on the side.

Megatron's optics lowered at that. Primus? Fuck Primus. What did that fucker ever do for him? He was far from believing he was going to be sent to Primus when he died, anyway. It wasn't worth the fucking pain and suffering. Plus… he enjoyed violence too much to get a ticket into their Heaven. However, letting his mother believe what she wanted to was never going to harm her, was it?

*****  
Seeing the mech, Char's optics fell. "I'm… so sorry," she whispered, looking back up to the bruises on Megatron's face as they were standing in the hallway, students walking back and forth. She lifted her hand to his cheek, watching him as he flinched.

Vermillion optics fell as he felt that warm, blessing hand. "Don't be," he said, lifting his hand to touch her own. "It wasn't your fault."

"No, I should have stopped them," Char said, her optics arched. "I tried, Megatron… they just didn't listen to me, like you did… I… Sometimes I wish I was stronger, so I could protect you like you always seem to protect me."

Megatron looked back up, feeling his hand still over her own smaller, feminine one. "I'm a mech, I'm meant to protect you," he said, giving a small, lopsided smile, the femme giving a blush.

"Still… I hate seeing you like this. I hate them being so cruel to you," she said, frowning as she looked into his optics. He was stronger than anyone she knew, and yet, he was so fragile at the same time. She wished the best for him, she really did, and she wished that she could be more help to him. But there was only so much that she could truly do. She couldn't stop two hot-headed mechs from fighting with him. She, physically, wasn't strong enough to stop them. Sure, she could talk to them, but like they'd actually listen to her?

With his hand falling, Megatron bit his lower lip. "Why do you position yourself in such a group?" he asked, looking at her. "With what they do, and how they act? You don't… You're not like them, Char. Why put yourself in such a group? Sure, they're popular, but is it really worth the cost?" he asked. "Primus, they beat me up, Char… And you want to see yourself with them? Do you really want to be stereotyped as one of those 'bots? You're… beautiful, Char. You don't need to be in their group for others to see or know that."

Char's optics arched at his words, her hands linking together in front of her as she looked up. "I can't explain something like that, Megatron," she said, rubbing her arm. "They're my friends… But you're my friend, too. I'm not going to choose sides, though."

"I'm not asking you!" said Megatron, not understanding why she stood by them when they were such dicks, though. "Are you ashamed of me? Is that it? Yesterday, you left me while I was broken on the floor… You chose them over me, Char… What am I supposed to think?" he asked.

"Megatron, please," said the femme, her optics beginning to glaze with tears. "I'd never choose one over the other, but I promised them I would go… If I stayed, they would have only picked on you more. It was the best decision to leave, for your sake," she explained.

"They broke your present! When you left? That fucking bastard hit me to the ground and smashed it!" said the older 'bot, his optics arching. "What does that say about your friends, Char? They're nothing but worthless hoons that like picking on less fortunate kids than them! They all have fancy houses and great parents, and they see that as some way to pick on the smaller mechs? What kind of friend is that!? I know I'm not the best of friends, nor am I a great mech, but Char… I-I…"

"Megatron?" said a voice, the young mech turning around at the site of him. "Primus, are you alright?" he asked, leaning down to look at the mech's busted face.

"Gammaray, w-what are you doing here?" asked the silver 'bot, looking back to Char who was casually playing with the locker door now, as if they weren't friends. He had told the femme that it would be best if they didn't show their relationship to Gammaray, considering he didn't want her in the spotlight of their sessions. Hell, there was no way he'd tell him he loved the femme.

"I wanted to ask if you could come by my office this afternoon. Your parents and I have to discuss something with you if that's alright?"

"It doesn't seem like I have much of a choice, do I?" asked Megatron, giving a shrug.

Gammaray gave a small smile. "It'll be good, don't worry. Plus, we might be able to talk about why you're covered in bruises, too," he said, putting a hand onto the mech's shoulder and patting it. "I'll see you this afternoon, okay? Please try not to get into too much trouble."

"Yeah… right," mumbled the silver mech, watching as the therapist walked down the corridor and disappeared. As soon as he was out of sight, he turned back to Char, the femme looking back at him. "Look, I have to get to class… I'll talk to you later," he said, knowing now wasn't the best time to tell her his real feelings for her.

As the mech walked past her, Char's optics lowered, knowing he was upset with her. She didn't choose between the two, she just didn't want Megatron getting more hurt yesterday by her friends. She knew they were harsh sometimes, but they were her friends, and she'd stick by them as much as she could, just as she would with Megatron, too. She didn't understand why they all couldn't be friends. If she had it her way, she'd invite Megatron to sit with them at lunch, but she knew it would simply give him negative attention, and she didn't want that.  
Sighing, she gripped her data-pads tightly in her arms. She should be heading to class, too. She was disappointed to hear that her friend had completely shattered the gift she had given Megatron, and she would talk to him about it, warning him to stay away from Megatron, and be nicer to him in the future. She doubted it would make much of a difference, though. That was where her friends and Megatron differed. Megatron always listened to her. He always took in what she said, and that right there should have been enough to prove to her he was a better friend than anyone else she knew.

*****  
With his back hitting the wall, Megatron gave a pained grunt, the mech before him holding his forearm against his chest to keep him against the wall. Apparently telling Char that he had broken her present wasn't the best of ideas…

"You fucking talk to her again and I'll kill you! You understand me!?" said the other mech, his name Windraw.

Giving a laugh, Megatron looked up, his danta flashing. "You'll kill me? Like I don't already welcome death, you fucking maggot!" he yelled, spitting on the mech in front of him. He was certainly beginning to deal with the beatings much better than he once was. It was his smart mouth that got him into trouble most of the times nowadays, anyway. He didn't care. He enjoyed seeing that look on their face. That look of being stood up to. It was pure fucking pleasure.

Growling, Windraw's optics narrowed, his fist curling as he punched the mech in the gut. "You filthy bastard," he sneered, throwing Megatron across the mechs bathroom floor.

Hitting the tiles, Megatron breathed hard, though he easily pushed himself back to his pedes. With the amount of physical trauma he experienced these days, Megatron's form was getting used to healing stronger, which meant his frame could take bigger forces than what it once could. That was the one thing that pleased him when he was hit around. He could take a real smashing and stand back on his pedes with ease.  
Brushing himself down, he cracked his neck to the side, giving a smirk. "You like her," he said, his optics flashing a dark glow. Oh yes, he could tell. This mech had it in for Char. He knew because of the mere reaction that had come from it. Char was mad at him, and that upset him on a personal level. That made his grin widen. He was now a territorial threat. Hell, he knew she'd never go for someone like Windraw, though.

"What!?" asked the younger mech, his optics hard. "Don't be so stupid. She's a femme!" he said, as if she had cooties or something.

**'Is this mech kidding? Fucking take him down. Show him who Char really loves, Megatron. Be a mech! Prove to her just how strong you are, and that you're not willing to take anyone else's bullshit. Come on, Megsy… do it for me, and for your lady…'**  
"So you're a faggot?" asked Megatron, folding his arms and looking down to the smaller mech. Yeah, he was taller than him by a whole grade, but that didn't mean others stopped pushing him around. He was still thin as hell, with no cybernetic muscle showing yet. He was an easy target, and one that usually didn't stand up for himself. It had only been the last solar-cycle that he'd begun changing. And it felt fucking good.

Windraw growled at the term. "What are you, some kind of sick sexist mech?" he asked. "No one uses those terms but haters! What's Char going to think when she hears you're a sexist pig?" he snapped.

True, terms like 'faggot' and other sexual insults were rarely used as insults, unless it were from older style 'bots who followed much older codes. Of course, considering his parents were religious, this term was heard a lot throughout the house with his father. His mother never used it, however, his father threw any insulting word at him to make him feel 'less of a mech', and that was just one of them that he'd picked up on.  
"How do you think she's going to feel when I tell her you threw me into the mech's bathroom and attacked me? You honestly think she's going to choose your side over this? I'm the fucking victim here, you're just the worthless tormentor. And I have the bruises to prove it," he said, his optics narrowing.

Since when did Megatron stand up for himself!? This mech was basically a punching bag for kids like him. He hardly ever fought back, and would just sit there in silence, brooding over it—and probably thinking up fucked up fantasies on how to kill them all. Mechs like this never _did_ anything, they were simply fantasies and nothing more. He knew his type.  
"Oh yeah? Too bad you'll be too fucking dead to tell her anything!" he yelled, running at the mech and lifting his fist—it being stopped in mid motion.

Grabbing the fist with his own hand, Megatron gave a demonic grin before twisting it, the mech flipping over onto the floor—a crack shattering in the echo of the bathroom. He heard the mech yowl in pain, and he simply placed his pede onto his shaken form. "Ever fucking touch me again and I'll kill you. That's not an empty threat, either. It's as real as the oil that's now coming out of your wrist," he sneered, crouching down and taking the arm into his hand.

"N-no!" yelled Windraw, trying to squirm away, though his body suffering too much pain. It was a turnaround for him. He'd never really been on the receiving end of pain before. He wouldn't be surprised if he were suffering from shock right now.

"No!? Like I yelled when you snapped my fucking pad yesterday!?" roared the silver mech, twisting the wrist ever-so-slightly, making the mech cringe and call out once more. "Let this be your only warning. You stay the hell away from me, you worthless cunt-bag. I may have been the mech to stop yesterday, but not a solar-cycle goes by without me thinking of a thousand ways to kill each and every one of you bastards. So don't think I'm lying when I tell you that this is your _only_ warning. Next time it'll be your fucking neck!" he spat, standing back up. "It'd be wise to say that you tripped and fell. I wouldn't want your little friends to turn out the same way…"

Arching his optics, Windraw watched the mech gently wash his hands in the sink. "Y-you're just going to leave me here!?" he asked, tears beginning to well in the corners of his optics. Fuck, it hurt! "You bastard! I'm going to tell my parents, and then you're gunna be in so much shit!" he yelled, though falling silent as the mech turned his helm, his optics looking to him.

"It's your funeral," Megatron smiled, leaning down and giving the mech a pat on the shoulder before heading out of the bathroom. He looked around; the corridors empty due to a lunch break and everyone being outside.  
Letting out an exhale, he leant his back against the thick door of the lavatory. "That felt good…" he whispered, looking down at his shaken hands. Primus, the feeling of being in control? It was something he couldn't even describe. It was amazing. Blissful. He'd do anything to feel that power again.  
**'What did I tell you, boy? I knew you had it in you. With your looks and my charm, we'll be on top in no time. And by on top, I mean on top of your little lady friend. Boy is she a fine piece of aft to fuck-'**  
"Shut it!" yelled the youngling, smacking his hands onto the sides of his helm. "Can't you keep quiet for at least a nanoklik!?" he asked, giving a mental growl. Primus, it was bad enough having mental debates with the voice inside his head, but now he was taking orders from it, and talking to it outside of his head? Primus, it was no wonder his mother and father wanted him on pills!  
**'I forgot, you're still piss poor when it comes to her, hm? Wow, maybe this really is love, Megatron. But let's just remember who is in charge of your lust here. That's me. You can charm her and dilly dally around with her all you want, little mech. But when it all comes down to it, it's going to be me who takes her virginity.'**  
"Touch her and you're fucking dead!" hissed the mech in a whisper so no one could hear him, despite the corridors being silent. As he heard a moan from inside the bathroom, he gave a nervous look, deciding to walk away. If anyone saw him there, he'd be in deep shit. Hell, he'd never really done something this major before to someone else, and though it felt like he was on some kind of high, he knew it had consequences. He just hoped the little rat wouldn't spill it out to anyone, otherwise he really would be in a lot of trouble.  
Walking out into the schoolyard, he sat himself down at one of the empty benches, putting his bag onto the table. Lunch wasn't exactly an eventful time for him, so sitting here alone was pretty shit. However, something in his mind made him pull out the box of cigarettes he had stolen from his mother's drawer. Hell, with both his parents smoking, how couldn't he want to try one of them? So flicking one out, he grabbed the lighter and lit it up, putting it between his lips.  
Breathing in, he almost choked, poking his tongue out. It was awful! No, it was worse than awful, it made him want to vomit! However, when it left his mouth, he wanted more. It wasn't tasty, but it was that horrible that he just wanted to try it again. It was strange, but it was somewhat soothing, so he placed it back between his lips and took another drag. Of course, this was going to have to have some getting used to.  
Breathing out the slightly magenta smoke, he looked down at the box, putting it back into his bag, as well as the lighter. He'd only have one, and then he'd probably just smoke in secret if he felt like another one. All he knew right now was that it was soothing once the pain in the back of his throat went away, and the stinging in his optics. However, he was started as he heard his name being said, making him turn his head and hide the smoke.

"Megatron… you're smoking on school grounds?" said Char, her optics arched. "What possessed you to do something like this?"

"What possessed you to think it's any of your business?" snapped the silver mech. "What, you think you can just come over here when you like it? Like I'm just some mech who will continuously accept you back into my life when all you do is rum from me when I'm in need!?" he asked, giving a scoff.

Shocked, Char's optics lowered, her hands together in front of her. "Megatron… please, I didn't mean to. This isn't like you…" What had gotten into him? Smoking in school—or at all—and now being so harsh to her? He was such a kind mech! Was he truly that upset with her? He didn't have to yell at her about it. She understood that he was probably feeling neglected, but she didn't mean to leave him. She was entitled to have other friends, too.

"Like me? Do you even _know_ me!?" he asked, standing up. "Forget it, Char. I stopped for you! I stopped fighting back when you said to. I would do _anything_ for you, Char! I would get on my knees and beg for you just to _see_ me! And this is what I get in return?" he asked, his spark thumping hard inside his chest. He just wanted to strangle her, and yet, he wanted to kiss her at the same time. How could someone make him so bad and get so needy at the same time? It was just wrong! It was fucking insane!

Looking to the mech, Char's optics arched as a small tear ran down her cheek. He was really upset with her. "I'm so sorry, Megatron," she said, putting her hands over her face. "You know you're my friend. Please don't do this to our friendship… I just wish things could be like my old school. Everyone was so nice there. No one fought. This is so new to me…"

Seeing the tears down her cheeks, Megatron's lips parted, his spark going tight in guilt. His optics lowered as he approached her, lifting her chin up. "I'm sorry…" he whispered, though surprised when she hugged him. Her body was warm against his, and he felt himself lean into her touch.

"Don't be. I was in the wrong, Megatron," she said, crying into his shoulder as she embraced him as tightly as she could. Considering he was so thin, it wasn't a problem. "Please don't think I don't like you. I do. You're a wonderful mech to me. But I can't choose between my friends. I love all of you the same as each other."

Megatron stiffened at the mention of the 'L' word. He swallowed hard, though knowing she was simply meaning it in a general term of friendship. But how he wanted it to be so much more than that. How could he simply let a crying femme go? He didn't mean to hurt her. He wanted to make her happy, not sad. He'd just… been frustrated over the whole ordeal, that was all.  
Pulling out of the embrace, he looked to her tear-glazed optics, his hand lifting to cup her cheek gently. It felt so perfect, like they were already lovers. Like this was just how it was meant to be. Primus, they were meant for each other—he could feel it in his spark.  
"I'm sorry," he whispered, running his thumb over her cheek. "You're entitled to have other friends than just me. I know that, Char. I also know that you care for me… I just… I don't like them, and I don't want them hurting you," he said, giving a frown. "I… Char, I…" Primus, how he wanted to tell her how much he loved her.

Leaning into his hand, Char looked up to those dark, mystical optics. However, she was pulled away as she heard the commotion at the entrance door, a siren being heard. It was an ambulance; she could see it as it drove up, two medics getting out.  
Looking to the group of guardians and students, Char's optics widened when she saw Windraw stumbling out into the open, a guardian aiding him. "Oh, Primus!" she gasped, looking to Megatron and tugging his arm to pull him over to the crowd.

"Char-wait!" protested the silver mech, though being dragged after her and through the crowd. As he saw the mech, the both of them stopped, his optics looking to the Windraw's. As the mech looked at him, he gave him a dark look, smirking in his direction as the optics looked away.

"What happened?" exclaimed Char, approaching her friend. "Are you okay!?"

Windraw's optics narrowed in Megatron's direction, though looking away as he saw the dark look in his optics. "I-it was nothing, I just fell in the bathroom," he lied; admittedly quite scared of the look the older mech was giving him. Something in him had changed. It was like he wasn't innocent anymore. That look in his optics. He didn't know what it was, but it made his oil shiver down the back of his nape. It was like pure evil.

With the two medics coming over, Megatron moved out of the way of the crowd, heading back inside the school. He'd heard what he needed to, and he was sure Windraw wasn't going to tell the truth. Not if he knew what was good for him. Instead, he left the flailing group to themselves. He'd be hospitalised and heal just like any broken mech. All he could think was that he wished it were permanent—that he'd be dead.

*****  
Sitting across from the sparkling, Gammaray adjusted his data-pads. "So, would you like to talk about why you're bruised up like this?" he asked, Megatron's optics down and his hands on the table they were seated at. Angra and Puncture were seated in the room as well, considering he had asked them to attend.

"It's nothing," said Megatron, his optics on his hands. "Just got into a fight."

"On the weekend?" he asked, arching a violet optic. "Was this deliberate?"

Looking up, Megatron narrowed his optics. "Do you think I go looking for fights!?" he asked. "Do you think I enjoy being this way!? Are you completely stupid!?"

"Megatron, baby, he's just trying to help," said Angra, standing up from her seat, though Gammaray putting his hand up to shush her.

"It's okay, Angra," said the therapist. "You and I both know Megatron's outbursts are becoming more frequent."

"Pff, more frequent?" stated Puncture, rolling his optics. "The boy just had a birthday an' he had a go at me 'cause I wanted to help 'im after this rot happened," he said, shaking his head. "Just give 'im the damn pills an' get this over with. None of us wanna be here, doc."

Looking back to the youngling, Gammaray placed his hands onto the table. "Is this true, Megatron? Did you yell at your father?" he asked, looking as the vermillion optics fell once more.

"He deserved it," whispered Megatron, looking back up to his father. "You deserved every word I said to you! Just like all of you do! You're a worthless therapist who can't even help me! My father's too fucking cheap to even get me a paid psychiatrist. What does that say about him!?" he asked, his optics blazing as he glared at the violet ones across from him.

Puncture could have gotten up and backhanded the boy, but he stayed seated—simply because Gammaray was there. From his knowledge, Megatron hadn't said anything to the therapist about his obsessive drinking, or the beatings he'd given his son while he was drunk off his aft. He wasn't going to get himself caught out.

"Megatron, this is a clear example of your impulses," said the coated mech, his hands on the table once more. "These pills that I have here should calm your temper when you're going through an impulse. You are to take one of them every morning after breakfast. It's best if something is in your systems to help," he added, standing and handing the cylinder to Angra to take care of. "Make sure he takes them."

Angra nodded. "Of course," she said, giving him a smile in thanks.

"You are to take them for a cyber-week, and I will document your actions afterwards to see if any improvements have happened. Is that clear?" Gammaray stated, leaning his hands onto the desk in front of the smaller mech.

"I don't have a choice, do I?" mumbled the future warlord. "What happens if I refuse?"

Gammaray smiled, giving a small laugh as he folded his arms. "Megatron, we can't force you to take these, but I do assure you, it would be best to see if this improves your attitude towards… well, Cybertron as a whole. Just do what the doctor tells you, it would be best that way," he said, giving the youngling a parental look.

Looking into those violet optics, Megatron was simply reminded of Char, and gave a nod. "Alright," he said, his optics lowering as he had just become a pathetic dog to the therapist. It wasn't that he didn't want help—he did. He just didn't want to be force-fed drugs that he didn't know would do to him. He was afraid he would change. That Char wouldn't love the mech that he'd change into while under the influence of medication. He liked being himself, even if that meant being violent and having the occasional odd mood swing.

"Good. It's settled," said Gammaray, turning around and shaking the hands of both Angra and Puncture. "You may all go home now. I'll document that he's accepted the treatment beneath parental guidance, considering he's still under age."

"Where did these pills come from?" asked Puncture, knowing they weren't for free. He didn't give Angra the money, and she didn't have any according to his knowledge.

Looking to the much larger mech, Gammaray gave a friendly smile. "It's a trial run, Puncture, it's funded by the school," he lied perfectly. "Nothing to worry about. It's all in the interest of the child."

"Hm, if you say so," said the father of the family. "C'mon, kid, let's go," he said, placing his hand onto Megatron's shoulder and leading him out of the office. He didn't like Gammaray. He didn't trust him one bit. That conniving look in his optics? Megatron and Angra may have taken to it, but not him. He saw through that conniving little shit. Free his aft. The school didn't pay for shit. There was only one way those pills had come cheap, and he knew what it was. It was just another reason to drink tonight. And just another reason to hate his son.

**Author's Comment:**

****Megatron's certainly getting more violent, if you can't tell. Also, I think Puncture's beginning to know about Angra and Gammaray's little... visits. :/ So, let's see how the medication works, hm?


	6. Chapter 6

Part VI

**WARNING: This chapter contains self mutilation. **

Sitting with the pill container in front of him, Megatron gave a harsh sigh. His mother had already tried to force him to take them the moment they had gotten home from Gammaray's office. However, he convinced her that the therapist said to start tomorrow—which was now three solar-cycles ago. He hadn't taken a single one of them, either. Sure, his mother had handed them to him after he'd eaten breakfast, but as soon as he was out that door, he'd spit them out half way down the street. There was no way he was taking this shit.  
Gammaray had said taking them would calm his impulses. Bullshit. He knew it wouldn't do a thing. They were trying to feed him pills to change him, to make him someone he wasn't. He knew who he was now. He was a mech. A mech that was rough, that hated Cybertron, his parents and everything else that was in the world. The only thing he cared for was that perfect femme in the darkness of his life.  
Biting his lower lip, he smiled to himself, leaning his cheek onto his palm. Since Windraw had been hospitalised, Char had come to him for that emotional support. Sure, he didn't like the mech, and he hated the fact that Char actually cared for the prick, but a helpless femme lured into his arms was more than he could ask for when it came to Char. It meant she had some kind of solace in him, and he was welcoming that more and more. He just kicked himself in the cogs every time he realised he didn't have the balls to tell her how much he loved her. He certainly didn't want to take medication _now_, though. Not when he could become emotionless and probably seem like an arse to her. He didn't want that changing. Plus, he was afraid his cable wouldn't stand if he took them.  
He was currently waiting for the femme, sitting on one of the benches in the locker rooms. It was half way through lunch already, but he didn't feel like sitting outside in the rain. The corridors were packed with other 'bots because of it, so he decided to slip into one of the more quiet areas. No one was meant to be in here during lunch, but who the hell needed to know besides Char?  
Hearing the door open, he looked up, putting the pill container into his bag. "Char, how's Windraw?" he asked, his voice caring, despite the true feelings he held for that no good fuck-up of a mech. Char knew they didn't like one another, but that didn't mean anything. He was still going to be there for his friend.

Sitting down across from the mech, Char gave a soft smile. "He's doing a lot better. The medics say he'll be out soon. He'll have to wear a brace, but that's about all. No major damage and nothing that couldn't be repaired," she said, enjoying the fact that it wasn't packed in here and much more quiet than the outside corridors. "What's in the container?" she asked.

Looking back into his bag, Megatron lowered his optics. "My therapist put me on medication," he said, frowning. "I haven't taken any yet, I was too afraid my personality would change. They're supposed to calm my impulses, but that's not what needs to be calmed down," he confessed, looking back up to her beautiful optics. No, that wasn't the thing that needed to calm down. It was his cable that needed to calm down. Primus, just this morning he'd had to stand in the shower to take a piss because his hard-on wouldn't go down.  
The only thing on his mind was the femme in front of him. He had to at least thank that considering he was fantasising about Char and he wasn't killing innocent animals and using them anymore. Well… he did occasionally down in the basement. But it was rarer than what it once had been.

"Oh… I'm sorry to hear," said the dark coloured femme, giving a soft smile and lifting her hand to pat his that was on the table. "You should probably take them, though, considering your therapist said so. Are you afraid of changing that much? Surely they wouldn't change you that dramatically…" she said.

Megatron shook his head. "I don't want to change, Char. I like the mech I am, especially when it comes to you," he said, giving a smile. "I wouldn't want to become someone different and have our friendship strained. I know my limits, and I know very well that you're the closest friend I have here. I wouldn't want to lose you just because I have to swallow some pills," he explained, watching as her cheeks went a light burning colour. He gave a soft laugh to her reaction.  
"I know my therapist told me to take them, and I know he wants to see the improvements… but sometimes I feel as if _you're_ my improvement," he said, swallowing hard. Primus, it wasn't the perfect time to tell her how he felt, but they were finally alone, with no guardians over their shoulders, or any of Char's stupid friends! It just felt like it was the perfect way to tell her—while they were alone.

Char felt her optics dim for a second as her cheeks flushed. He was such a sweet mech. She wasn't completely blind to Megatron's problems. She knew he had some dark thoughts, she knew he didn't enjoy older 'bots or authority figures, either. She knew he was unstable, and she could understand why his therapist had given him pills to 'calm' him down. She wished he would take them, just to see if they helped, but she would never force him to. She liked the mech for who he was, and how kind he was to her. Sure, he could be cruel to other 'bots, but around her, he was the sweetest of young boys.  
"Primus, you're making me blush," she giggled, returning her hands to herself, though looking back to the vermillion optics as they looked into her own. He was a charming mech when he wanted to be. She knew that. She also knew that there was a good mech inside that horrible, troubled child that was her friend. She just wished he would tell her everything that was going on inside her head—so she could help him.

"You're beautiful when you blush, though," said the older mech, giving a grin, though only feeling himself blush as she looked back at him. "Char… look. There's something I've been meaning to tell you," he said, looking at her. Fuck, she was just so perfect. He could feel his spark thumping in his audios. For the first time in his life, he could say he loved someone. But for the first time, he just couldn't say it. It was like his throat just closed up and wouldn't open.

Sensing the other go quite tense, Char cocked her head lightly, touching her hand to his cheek. "What is it?" she asked, her voice soft as she watched him. She saw him stiffen as her hand went against him, but she left it there when his own overlapped hers.

"I… you're my only friend, Char, and… you've been with me through so much shit," he said, his chest going tight as his head spun from the sheer nerves. Primus, he could feel his hands shaking, and it made him try to tense to stop it. "Every solar-cycle, I have to go through so much suffering, and I know I do it in silence, but I just don't want to bother you. You're what brings me happiness in my life. If I were to bring you down… I don't know what I'd do. I'd rather die…" he whispered, his optics arching.

What was he talking about? Where was all of this coming from? She understood teenagers were very 'hormonal', but it wasn't like Megatron to start spilling out his feelings. What was he trying to tell her, exactly?  
Taking his hands into her own, the femme gave a soothing smile. "Megatron, don't worry. I'm going to be here for you," she said, her optics looking into his. "You're a wonderful mech to me. I know you're troubled, and I know you're suffering, but please… please don't feel bad for wanting to tell me what's going on inside your head," she said.

Primus, she was just inviting him in, wasn't she? How could she not share the same feelings as him? She had to love him, right? No femme would put up with so much shit if they didn't. She had to… And the mere thought was driving him insane. He had to know! Now!  
Letting his optics fall to her perfect lips, he wanted to taste them. He wanted to taste her! He wanted their bodies to be against one another, sharing something special. Warm, humid and tangled. He just wanted them to be together, embracing their love for one another.  
Unable to stop himself, he leant forward, their lips locking as he kissed her, feeling a kiss for the first time in his life. It was perfect. It was warm. It was soft. And he couldn't help but let his dark tongue slip into her mouth to taste her essence. It was just too perfect.

With wide optics, Char froze for a moment in sheer shock, grabbing his shoulders and pushing the mech from her, standing up from the seat. "M-Megatron…! I… what did you do that for!?" she asked, her spark pumping hard nervously in her chest as she looked to the now confused mech. She liked him, but she didn't like him like _that!_ Eww! She was still just a kid!

Breathing hard, Megatron stood up from his seat. "I… Char, please, I can't help it," he said, his voice going weak. "Every day, I can't stop this feeling. I need you in my life. I need you against me," he said, ignoring the burning sensation that was surrounding his groin. Fuck, he was so hard for her. He just wanted to throw her against the locker and fuck her. No, that was the other part of him talking! He couldn't hurt her!  
**'Don't let her go! You've sealed the deal now, Megatron. Show her how much she means to you. Take her and open those sweet, virgin thighs. I bet she's dripping wet from that kiss, Megatron. Come on, you're making me so fucking hard! Just take her like you want to before she can run away!'**  
Unable to control himself, Megatron did what the voice inside told him to. And the next thing he knew, he had pushed the femme against the locker, shoving their bodies together and grabbing her hands, his lips forcing themselves into hers. His cable was standing upright inside the casing, throbbing for the release. Fuck, he wanted to overload on her and inside her. Make her feel just how much he loved her.

"Mmm! Megatron, get off!" yelled the femme, untangling her frame from his and shoving him back. "What the hell is wrong with you!?" she yelled, her voice shaken from her fear. She wasn't afraid of Megatron, she just didn't know how to deal with the situation at hand. She didn't love Megatron! She didn't want to be with him romantically! Primus, she was only young! It was a crime for her to even lay with another 'bot until she was older—even though 'bots her age still did it, anyway.

Panting, the silver mech swallowed hard. "But I thought you wanted it…" he said, his voice soft and confused. "After all we've been through… I-I _love_ you," he confessed, his spark going tight as she looked at him in sheer shock. No, no! This was all going so wrong! He thought she was supposed to love him back! Just the way that he loved her! Why was she looking at him like he was some kind of fucking freak!? He just wanted them to be together!

"No…" whispered the shaken femme, her hands covering her mouth. "No, Megatron…" she said, shaking her helm and grabbing her things before running from the room. She didn't know how to act. She didn't want to hurt him (thought she knew she had), but she couldn't just let him take her like that. A locker room was disgusting. The mere thought of interfacing just wasn't on her mind! She wasn't like that! She was proper when it came to this kind of thing. She needed to be like her mother and let a mech take her only when she was willing, and one that was stable enough to provide her with a family and a home. Megatron just wasn't that mech. He didn't understand the first thing about relationships!

Feeling his spark tear to shreds, Megatron's knees gave way as he fell to the floor, his hands smacking the tiles on the floor. "You bitch!" he yelled, grabbing the sides of his helm. "You were supposed to love me! You were supposed to care for me!" he yelled to himself, curling into a ball. "Why don't you love me…?" he wept.  
With tears running down his cheeks, his world collapsed. Everything pure in it was that femme, and now she was gone. He lived for her. To make her happy! How could she just run away like that!? She was supposed to love him, like he loved her! Not betray him and run away, looking at him like he was nothing but an animal!  
Gritting his denta, he growled, grabbing his bag. He couldn't stay here! He couldn't! Not with her. Anywhere was better than here. Even if that meant having to go home to his abusive mother and father. He'd rather suffer their pain than the spark-ache he was suffering right now.

*****  
The days had been worse than he thought. Char had completely avoided him, and in his own humiliation, he had simply done the same thing. His parents didn't know, but he'd been more miserable than he ever had been in his life. The days were long, longer than he ever wanted to feel. Especially when his mother caught him just before bed. Primus, how he wanted to take that pendant from her hands and wrap it around her worthless neck, killing her with her own God's symbol. Fuck it! Fuck it all! All he wanted to do was crawl in a hole and die.  
Feeling a warm tear drop down his cheek, he was seated in the bath, his knees to his chest as he tried not to cry. The voice inside his head had become more intense than it had ever been. It was screaming at him, telling him to kill everything in his life. Even Char. It was screaming, yelling at him to go back to that house and force her to love him the way she had forced him to love her. With those large, pearly optics. That sweet voice. It was all a fucking LIE! That cunt fucked with his spark and tore it in two! It was nothing but a worthless pissed upon puddle inside his chest, and all he wanted to do was stab it! End this misery! He just wanted to see her suffer the way she had made him. It was the same with all of them.  
The new pill container was sitting beside him on the bath ledge, Gammaray having given him more. He had seemed more calm in their sessions, but that was simply because he didn't have the motivation to speak or yell. His spark was too sore. The depression was killing him from the inside. He figured Gammaray thought it was from the pills, that he had truly calmed down. Showed how much that fucking prick of a mech knew about him. Fucking moron!  
He'd only been home a while, and he knew what was coming. His mother. This time, he couldn't do anything about it. He simply allowed it to happen. Sure, he tried convincing her that he wasn't a sin, and that he'd never be like his father, but here she was, ripping him from the tub and yelling at him, cursing him for what he was. It wasn't his fucking choice! In the end, it was just too much. He couldn't have peace. He couldn't have Char's love. He couldn't have his mother's acceptance. What was the point in going on?  
With his mother now gone from the room, he was cold and naked, the cool water sticking to him in the afternoon atmosphere. He just wanted it gone. He just wanted it all to go away. He didn't care how. All he knew was that there was one thing that would make the two femme's he craved so much for attention to love him. If it were gone, he'd never hurt Char again. If it were gone, his mother couldn't hate him anymore. She _had_ to love him. After all, he wouldn't be a mech without it, would he?  
Grabbing the pill container, he made his way over to the sink, opening the first drawer and taking out a pair of scissors. His hands shook, but he managed to open the pill container, flipping it back as he sculled them down his throat, swallowing pill after pill. If that didn't kill him, then he knew the next action would. Plus, maybe they'd make him the better mech everyone wished for him to become. Now came the hard part.  
Shuddering, he held the scissors tight in his left hand, placing the blade against the very base of his cable. He knew he'd lose oil, he knew he'd be in pain. It was worth it. To be happy. To feel that love. And putting pressure against the member, he felt it slice against him, making him groan in pain, his head spinning.  
Dimming his optics, he let his head fall back and gasped, his legs trembling. "Ogh… P-Primus…" he breathed, feeling hot liquid run down his hand and legs. Groaning, he gasped as his hand slipped and the scissors fell to the floor in a pool of dark oil and water.  
As inertia hit him, he leant his palms against the sink railing, his head looking to the labyrinth of blood and water beneath him. "Uhh…" Heat waves rushed through his body as he began to feel dizzy. He was losing blood, but as long as that thing on his body was non-functional, everything would be fine.  
Falling to his hands and knees, he gagged as the dizzy-spell grew worse, his body falling to the ground in a pile of his own blood. All he could see was darkness. And maybe this was the way he wanted it.

Hearing a thud from upstairs, Angra gave a not-impressed look from her seated position. If he was doing something nasty in there, she was going to punish him for such wickedness. She shook her head and headed back upstairs, opening the door. In her own horror, she wasn't expecting to see the sight before her—the mech passed out in a pile of his own oil.  
She screamed, running into the room and landing on her knees before her fallen child. "Puncture!" she bellowed, tears running down her optics. "Puncture, please! My baby!" she wept, hearing the footsteps coming up the stairs, obviously concerned to whatever was happening.

"Holy fuckin' shit!" yelled the older mech, racing in at the scene, the youngling naked in his mother's arms, blood dripping from the wounded area and making dark paths down his thighs and onto the floor. "What the fuck 'appened!?" he yelled, grabbing his communications unit and calling an ambulance.

With her blood-stained hand, Angra ran it down her son's cheek, the mech's body still. She could see fallen pills on the floor, the scissors there, too. Why would he do such a thing!? Why would he try to kill himself!? It was a sin! There was no salvation in suicide! It was just becoming a slave to Death!  
"Oh, baby! Please, baby, wake up!" she whispered, kissing against his helm. The sparkling didn't move. He was as still as ever, still leaking from the torn up appendage. "Puncture, get me a tourniquet of some kind! I need to stop the leaking!" she yelled frantically, the mech taking the order and handing her a towel. "Come on, baby, Mummy's here. I'm here for you, darling. Come on, you're gunna be saved," she cooed, kissing him and letting Puncture take the limp form into his much stronger arms.

Oh, shit. What the hell had happened? Why would Megatron try to cut his cable off? Of anything!? Why that!? Puncture didn't understand. His own son, trying to tear his body apart? Was this his fear? Did Megatron really want to be a femme, like he'd seen Angra influencing him into? Or was this something deeper? Hell, for the first time in his life, he was panicking for the child. He actually cared. He couldn't let him die like this!  
"Shit, boy, what the hell 'ave you done to yourself?" he asked, taking the form down the stairs and wrapping him up as much as he could, trying to put pressure against the open wound. He was covered in blood, but it was his son's, and he didn't care. He just wanted the mech to make it out of this okay. He wanted answers! What the fuck had possessed the kid to do something so fucked up!? He knew Megatron wasn't stable, but _this!?_ This was just wrong…

Pacing the room, Angra waited for the ambulance to arrive, hearing the siren just down the street. She ran outside, waving them down like a madfemme, grabbing onto the mech's arm as soon as he had opened the door.

"Calm down," said the medic, though being dragged inside. Once he was in, he called his partner in, the other mech grabbing out a stretcher from the back of the vehicle. "Primus, we gotta get him into the E.R," he said, allowing the father of the family to lay the boy down into the travel berth before putting him into the back. "Come on, we'll take him to Kaon Hospital. You can ride in the back if you wish," he said, allowing the two parents to sit in with his partner.

Sitting beside his mate, Puncture placed his hand to his mouth, his frame shaking quite badly. He knew he didn't treat Megatron with the respect a proper son should deserve. He knew he took his anger out on him when it was Angra who should have been getting punished. But he still loved him. He didn't show it because of his sheer disappointment, but he loved his son.  
Feeling Angra's hand take his, he cringed for a moment, though relaxed. She was nothing but a lying bitch of a femme, but for once, the both of them were sharing the same feelings. They were worried sick for their sparkling. "He'll be okay," he whispered, patting her hand. Primus, he prayed he'd be okay and make it out of this alive.

**Author's Comment:**

****Well, we know what happens in the end with Megatron, but it's never easy knowing all the pain he's suffered. So here'd, finally, the scene where he tells Char his feelings for her, and another reason why 'love' is such a taboo for Megatron in the future.

I didn't write in the complete molestation scene, because I actually based it off an older ficlet I wrote called Flashback. It's old, so it's got some mistakes, and probably isn't the full scene I wanted [like having the pills in there], but I wanted it to still tie in with it.

You also see that Puncture can be a loving father when he wants to be, as well as Angra can be a caring mother. It's just very rare.


	7. Chapter 7

Part VII

With a searing ache in his systems, Megatron could hear the rhythmic beeping of a monitor beside him. How long had he been out? Where was he? What happened? Was this blackness his Heaven? Or was it his Hell? He didn't know. All he knew was that his systems were in a tremendous amount of pain.  
Feeling his optics flicker online, the light was intense to his sensors, making him lift his hand to shade his face. He could feel things attached to him. Wires. He figured he was in hospital, by the looks and feel of everything. It was cold. However, his mind wasn't on the fact that he was being helped. It was angry at the fact that he had survived. That bastard cunt couldn't even let him die!  
"Nn…" he groaned, giving a soft breath as he tried to push himself up into the pillows behind him. He couldn't believe it. He was clean. He was being treated by medics. And he could feel the bandage around his nakedness below, meaning his wounds were most likely healing. How he wished they had to have amputated that fucking sin on his body!  
"No… No!" he yelled, grabbing at the wires and ripping them out. This wasn't how it was supposed to be! He was supposed to be dead! He was supposed to be free of this fucking demon! And here it was, still attached to him! Why!? Why couldn't Hell even fucking have him!? Why was Primus making him suffer!? He wanted to die! Not be here, alive!  
Feeling a hand touch him, he flinched, throwing it from him, seeing the medic there. "Get off me!" he yelled, pushing himself out of the berth, though his feet collapsing beneath him, not to mention the amount of pain that went through his groin area, making him cry out in pain, his denta tightening.

"Megatron, you must stay in your berth," said the medic, the badge on his coat saying 'Cypher'. He walked over to the youngling, picking him up and placing him back under the sheets. "You're in the hospital. You cut yourself in the cable, Megatron. Do you remember this?" he asked, softly placing his hands onto the shaken mech's shoulders.

Lifting a hand, Megatron covered his face, tears beginning to make their way down his cheeks. "Why did you save me…?" he whispered, his optics going narrow as he threw the doctor's hand from him. "You bastard fuck! Why did you save me!? I wanted to die! I wanted it gone!" he yelled, grabbing the berth sheet and covering himself with it as he tightened into a ball.

Watching the mech, Cypher grabbed a sedative, ready to use it if he had to. The mech had already been sedated for three solar-cycles. "Your therapist is here, Megatron, if you wish to talk to him. He's just in the waiting room. I advise getting some more stasis in your weakened state, but I think you need someone to talk to."

Wiping the back of his palm across his tear-stained face, Megatron shook his head. "I just want to be alone…" he said, breathing softly as he tried to calm himself. "I just want to rest… I-is there anyone else waiting?" he asked, almost hopeful to hear that Char had come for him.

Shaking his head, Cypher placed the wires back into the mech's wrist, giving him an extra boost on fluids. "Just your mother and father. Would you like to see them?" he asked, watching as the mech relaxed back underneath the sheets.

"No…" the future Decepticon whispered, his voice going dark. "No, I don't."

Nodding silently, the medic grabbed the chart and put it back onto the end of the berth. "Alright," he said. "There will be a nurse to give you some energon in a while." He closed the door once he left, allowing the mech to get some rest. Primus knew he'd be in some serious pain. He'd seen a lot of fucked up shit in his days in the E.R and on the Wards, but he'd never seen a kid as young as Megatron attempt to remove his cable. He'd have to put him on suicide watch, too, by the looks of things.  
Walking into the waiting room, he approached Angra, Puncture and Gammaray, the mech he had known to be Megatron's psychiatrist. "Megatron's wake," he said, though putting up his hand before the others could speak, "but he's in dire need of rest. He won't be able to have visitors until he's completely strong enough to handle it. I'm going to have to put your son on suicide watch, too…"

"Suicide watch?" whispered Angra, her optics arching. Not her boy! Not her little sparkling! Surely he wasn't trying to kill himself, he had just been trying to purify himself for her. She looked to Gammaray, as if the mech could actually talk to Cypher and sort this all out with him.

"Yes, that's probably for the best," stated the therapist, folding his arms and giving a light not to the child's parents. "Angra, Puncture, call me as soon as you're allowed to see your son. It's probably best for the both of you if you just go home. I'm sure Doctor Cypher will tell Megatron you were here."

Narrowing his optics, Puncture gave a light growl. "An' where do you think you're goin'? You're that kids fuckin' shrink. You shoulda seen this comin'!" he yelled, his fangs showing, though feeling Angra's hand go against his arm. It only pissed him off more, though.  
He wanted to smack Gammaray. Break his jaw and show everyone the rip off fraud that he was. He wasn't helping Megatron! Ever since the mech had been sessioning him, he'd only gone from bad to downright fucked! And now he just _knew_ that his bond-mate was fucking him behind his back. Sticking up for him like that? Bullshit nothing was happening between them!

Running a hand down his chin, Gammaray watched the older mech. "Mr. Puncture, I'm very sorry, but your son's behaviour is very unpredictable. This wasn't something that anyone could predict or see coming," he said.

"You're lucky we're not payin' you! You fuckin' worthless mech," sneered Puncture, grabbing the mech by the collar of the coat. He stopped as both Cypher and Angra grabbed at him, though, dropping the smaller mech. "Call me when I can see my son."

Watching as Puncture stormed off, Angra frowned, looking back to Gammaray. "He doesn't mean that, he's just worried about his son," she said, as if it would take away the tension between the two 'bots. "I… I should go, though, he's my ride back home."

Gammaray straightened his coat back up, brushing himself down. "Yes, of course," he said, nodding and letting Angra go. When she was out of sight, he turned to the medic. "I know you said no one could see the patient, but I am Megatron's psychiatrist. I think it would be wise for me to speak to him and see that he's comfortable right now."

Although it was against the rules to allow visitors at a time like this, Cypher knew that therapists were a whole different level. He had no option but to agree to it. "Yes, but only for a moment. His health right now is more important than anything else."

Nodding, Gammaray followed the other mech into the small room. Once in, he closed the door, figuring that the medic would have to stay in there to overwatch in case anything bad happened.  
Walking over to the berth, he saw the small lump that was curled beneath the sheet, Megatron's back facing him. He softly sat on the empty side, placing his hand to the mech's shoulder. "Megatron…" he said softly, his voice gentle. "How are you feeling?"

As the hand touched him, the youngling's body tensed, making him wince as the pain from his wounds surged through his systems. He said he didn't want to talk to anyone! Why did the medic let him in here!? He didn't want to explain this to anyone! He just wanted to be alone to wallow in his own self-pity and misery.  
Slowly wiping the tears from his face, he didn't turn around, he simply stayed still. He was in too much pain to move even if he wanted to, anyway. Instead, he just said, "Sore."

Frowning, the therapist nodded. "You know when you're feeling better that we have to discuss what you did, right?" he asked, seeing the sparkling's optic ridges narrow from his position.

Of course he did. **'Bullshit! You don't have to tell this wanker anything! He's nothing but a fucking prick that gets off on your pain and suffering. I bet he goes home and jacks off to that shit! Ha!'**  
Slapping a hand to the side of his helm, he winced, giving a shaken breath. No! The last time he listened to that demon was when he did something horrible! He loved Char! He never wanted to harm her, but this bastard had made him. He would not fall to such sin again.  
Swallowing hard, he relaxed once more, pushing himself up to look over his shoulder. "Can it wait…?" he asked softly, his optics lowering for a second. "I… I don't want to talk about it right now." Or ever, for that matter. At least if he promised him he'd tell him later, Gammaray would get off his back about it now.

Giving a soft smile, Gammaray nodded. "Of course, Megatron. You need your rest. The good medics here at Kaon Hospital will look after you. If you ever need to talk to me, you know I'm just a phone call away, alright? Your parents are very worried for you, too."

Worried? Yeah, right. His father was probably bitching and moaning about the fuel they had to use to get here and the hospital bill, and his mother was probably praying to Primus that he had died from his actions. Megatron found it hard to believe that they were worried about him at all.

Seeing the youngling turn back around and lay beneath the sheet, Cypher placed the chart back onto the bottom of his berth. "He needs his rest now, sir. You can come back when he's feeling better. For now, he needs stasis to recover."

"Yes, indeed," said the coated mech, his violet optics leaving Megatron's form. "I'll be back as soon as I can, Megatron. You get your rest." As he stood, he gave the medic a simple nod before walking from the room.

Tugging on the sheet, Megatron tried to relax into the soft cushioning of the berth. "C-can I please get another blanket?" he asked, his form cold. It was warmer than the berth he had at home, but he just wanted to be wrapped up, safe inside the blankets—where no one could hurt him.

"You may," said Cypher, giving a small smile as he grabbed a spare blanket from the shelf inside the room. Placing it over the sparkling, he crouched down. "Hey, if you need anything at all, just press this button here, okay?"

Slowly nodding, Megatron simply grasped the sheet as tight as he could, curling up into it.

"Good," whispered the medic, placing his hand onto the mech's shoulder and rubbing it before standing. "Get some rest," he said before walking out of the room. He'd call the police in on this and make sure the youngling was guarded at all times. There was a reason why the kid did this to himself (and clearly considering he had a therapist). It wasn't his job to get down to the bottom of it—that was Gammaray's—but he'd still make sure the child was as safe as he could be. That included self-infliction.

*****  
The next few solar-cycles had been painful and confusing. For everyone included in what had happened. The suffocation of everyone seeing him was something that really got to the young Megatron, though. Primus, he just wanted some peace and quiet, and he was happy once the room was empty once more.  
There were now police outside his door, keeping a watch on him. Considering he had Gammaray, the hospital didn't appoint a therapist to him, and Gammaray had been in there any moment he could. Of course, both his parents and the therapist had asked him why he had done such violence to himself, but what was he supposed to say? If he told Gammaray, it would mean having to expose the truth about what his mother was doing to him. If he told his mother, she would probably abandon him due to his failure, and if he told his father? Primus, the mech would probably laugh in his face and call him a femme. There was no point in telling the truth. He'd simply keep it to himself.  
Overall, the pain was getting less painful for him now as the days passed. He'd been in here for a good cyber-week, with medics tending to his wounds every solar-cycle, not to mention he was getting check-ups every cycle, too.  
He was torn between wanting to get out of here and going home, though. At home, there was no one there to care for him. But here? He could see the way they looked at him. The nurses. The femmes. How they thought he was a freak for what he had done. They didn't know! They didn't understand! Who the fuck were they to judge his actions!? They were all a bunch of pretty little femmes with crossed hats on their helms. They were supposed to be comforting him, not laughing at him behind their hands!  
Was he paranoid? No. Well, maybe a little, but it was the truth. He had heard them. The group of femme nurses talking about his room number, and how much of a sick kid he had been to do something like that. He would have figured femmes would be supportive and worried, even concerned about his actions. He had been wrong. They were nothing but worthless bitches! Just like his mother. Cussing him and cursing him for what he was and what he had done.  
Sitting up in the berth, he gave a soft sigh, knowing that getting angry about it wasn't going to do much. It would never change how others saw him. To them, he was nothing but a freak. Nothing but a mad mech.  
**'Don't sit there as if it doesn't hurt you, Megatron. Who the hell are they to judge you and your actions!? If they only knew what was done to you. US! Primus, stop being such a fucking sparkling and tell them how you feel. Tell them that they deserve to be fucked and thrown to the floor. Pretty nurses are always so fun to play with. Especially when they scream.'**  
Swallowing hard, Megatron's optics arched as he listened to the voice inside his head. He was right, though. Why bother fight anymore? Why let these worthless femmes get to him!? Femmes were nothing but pieces of shit to hate! Even the one he loved… Even she betrayed him. Not once had he heard from her. Not a call! Not a single word!  
Feeling his spark go tight, he lifted his hand as he felt a warm tear run down his cheek. "No… I will not be weak," he whispered to himself, wiping it away and letting his chin come up. There was no point in trying to ignore it. The voice inside his head was the one he should be listening to, not his mother, father, Gammaray or even the medics around here. None of them knew him like the voice inside his head!  
As if in a daze, he pushed off the sheets, a hospital robe around his naked protoform (which had to be free of cover due to the injury needing to heal beneath the bandage). As he stood, his legs were rather shaky, but the pain was bearable now. He didn't exactly know what he was doing, or where he was going. All he knew was that he wanted to hunt down that nurse bitch and give her what she deserved. He was sure the hospital had instruments lying around that he could stab her with.  
Taking a few steps, he was stopped as the door opened, making him snap out of his daze, his optics arching as he realised he was out of the berth. Shit… did that just happen!? He thought it was just a dream, a fantasy! Oh, Primus, his second personality really _was_ starting to gain control of him…

"Megatron," said Cypher, heading in towards the youngling and helping him back to the berth, "what are you doing out? You should be resting." He gave a light smile as the mech seemed to obey the order, positioning himself back onto the hospital berth, though seeming a bit confused. "You have a visitor."

Looking up, Megatron's optics arched once more. "A visitor?" he asked. "W-who?" He knew it wasn't his mother or father, or Gammaray. The medic usually said their name when he said they were coming in to visit. Plus, his father rarely visited, and his mother usually only came to visit after she had been out at night—smelling of sex and high-grade. Only meaning one thing. She'd gotten a few shanix to take a taxi here after pleasuring some random mech.

"Yes," said Cypher, checking the chart and writing something on it before putting it back down. "I'll leave you two alone," he said, giving a light smile before walking out of the door and letting the other in.

With optics wide, Megatron didn't know what to say. What was she doing here!? Why!? She didn't care about him! Why come and lie to him like this!? He didn't understand. After what had happened between the two of them, he was positive that she would never come and see him now—even if he had prayed for her to.

Walking into the small room, Char gave a light smile, walking over to the hospital berth. "If I had heard the news earlier, I would have come quicker, Megatron," she said, her voice soft. Despite what had happened between them, Char would never simply leave him alone in a delicate and emotional position like this. She didn't completely know what happened, but she had heard enough from her mother (who had heard it from other parents around the school) to grasp the seriousness of the situation. "I-I thought you just skipped school… b-because of me," she said, her optics glazing as a tear ran down her cheek. Oh, Primus, she felt horrible! Was this her fault!?

Watching as the femme wept, Megatron's spark went tight. No, why was she crying!? "Char, please…" he said, moving himself over to her as he was still beneath the sheets. "Please, don't cry."

"I'm so sorry, Megatron!" she sobbed, her arms going wide as she tugged him into a tight embrace. "I'm so sorry I hurt you! I didn't mean to. Please tell me this isn't my fault! I couldn't live with myself if I was to blame for this."

What? Her? Why would she be blaming herself? This was not her fault! This was _never_ her fault! How could she even think something like that? Primus… he _loved_ her! "What?" he asked, pulling out of the embrace and giving a bit of a wince as his legs had moved too quickly, his cable bumping up against his thigh. That was when he realised he was completely naked under the robe.  
Making a small sound of surprise and embarrassment, he grabbed the sheet and covered himself as much as he could, his cheeks burning as the femme looked at him with confusion on her face. "I'm sorry…" he said, looking away.

"O-oh! I-I didn't realise. How silly of me!" said Char, returning the blush. "I should have known considering your wounds." Her voice turned soft now, giving a small girlish giggle at his embarrassment. It was rare to see him blush, but when he did, he was adorably cute.  
Her face soon turned serious, though, a worried look on her face as he settled down. "Megatron… I'm sorry about what happened the other solar-cycle. I-I didn't mean to freak out on you like that," she said, her optics going down. "I just…"

"I understand," said Megatron, his voice soft. He knew now that she didn't like him the way that he liked her. It was hard to get around, and his mind was killing him for having to say no to her. But that's simply the way it was. He knew in the future that his darker personality would probably disregard of him saying no to violence against her, but the better part of him would still crawl on his knees for her. That's just what love was. She was everything to him. And she was here. That meant more than anything right now. She didn't have to come after what had happened between them, but she did. And for that, he would always see her as his guardian angel.

"You do?" she asked, her optics still glazed from her previous crying. "I still like you, Megatron. I-I'm just not ready," she stated, giving another frown. "We're just kids. We've got so much to hold onto and look forward to in the future. I-I don't want to ruin that."

Letting his hand take her cheek, Megatron brought her optics to his. "I can wait for you," he said, his voice a dead set promise to his words. "Just… please don't be afraid of me. I'm sorry I did that to you, and if it means breaking our friendship, I will never do it again. For you. For us," he said, giving a light smile for the first time in days. Primus, she was like everything to him.

Giving a smile back, Char took his hand and placed it into her two, putting it on the berth. "Megatron… please… Why did you do this to yourself?" she asked, looking into his optics as they arched, as if scared that she would think something bad of him. "You can talk to me, Megatron, you know you can. I would never tell a soul." Hell, she hadn't even told anyone about what had happened between them the other day. Her mother had asked, but she didn't want her getting the wrong idea of Megatron and his condition. He was sick. He didn't know what he was doing…

Megatron's optics lowered, feeling his skin crawl as he thought about it. How he wished he had cut that dreadful thing from his body! It was keeping him nothing but filthy. He just wanted to tear it off. "Char… I-I can't," he said, his body shaking hard as he felt water beginning to well at the creases of his optics. How could he tell her? She'd look at him like he was nothing but dirt! Something filthy upon Cybertron, just like his mother did. How could he tell such a wonderful femme something so horribly and vial? It just made him want to vomit! But could he lie to her? He didn't know…

It was that bad? Primus, what could it possibly be!? She knew that his mother was a horrible femme, and that his father hit on him. But what else was being done beneath that roof? What would possibly make Megatron try to mutilate himself like that? What would it prove to his family? Or even to himself!?  
Squeezing his hand tightly into her own, she watched as a tear fell down his cheek. "I'm here for you," she whispered, pushing herself up onto the berth and hugging him once more as he broke down into her arms, sobbing.

"I'm so sorry!" he cried, leaning into her warm shoulder. She did care… She was the only one. She was the only one he could trust, too. Even after what he had done to her, she had come back to him. Like a true friend.

"Don't be sorry," said Char, letting him cry into her shoulder as her own optics were glazing up once more. "You have nothing to be sorry about."

"I'm so filthy…" Megatron whispered, though unable to look at her. "I can't take it. I can't stand her hands on me! I just want it all to go away, Char. I can't stay there. Every time she looks at me, I feel like I'm nothing but her toy. Her puppet on strings! And then she claims its love! And that she's washing away my sins!" he said, his hands going tight as he grabbed the sheets, weeping hard.

What? What was he talking about? She didn't understand? She? His mother? Her cerulean optics arched as she pulled out and let her hand take his tear-stained cheek. "Megatron… what are you saying?" she said, her spark going tight. "Please don't tell me you're saying she…"

Watching her, Megatron didn't know if he could tell her. But the urge was too strong. He'd been dying to tell someone—anyone! But he just couldn't trust anyone! But he could trust her. She'd never tell a soul. He knew that. He could see it her optics. She'd know he wasn't lying. Unlike everyone else.  
"Yes, Char…" he said, his optics lowering once more. "She t-touches me. She molests me."

**Author's Comment:**

So, here's Megatron finally reveling to Char what is being done to him. Now you just have to see how she takes it. They're such an emotional pair. XD I love it. I love their angst. It's so angsty!

Also, how they became friends once more after what happened between them in the locker room. Considering Char never said no about waiting for him in the future, he's pretty much fixed on the idea that ONE DAY they will live happily ever after. We all know they don't... but his goal towards living that dream is what pretty much keeps him going. Until he eventually breaks...

Also, you can see that Puncture really does care for Megatron. But once the rape happens? Yeah, he basically just... gives up.


	8. Chapter 8

Part VIII

Char simply looked at Megatron, her lips parting. What? How could this happen…? She knew his parents treated him like shit, but this!? This was beyond something she could even comprehend in her head. Why didn't he tell her before now!? Everything seemed to make so much sense now! Why he was so strange around other femmes. Why he was so quiet. And certainly why he probably tried to kiss her the other day.  
But what was she supposed to say? She honestly wanted to go home and cry to her mother—tell her everything! But she couldn't break Megatron's trust like that. She would _never_ do that. Not now, knowing that she was pretty much the only other 'bot who he had told. Did his therapist know about this?

Watching her, Megatron's optics lowered. "I-I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything," he said, lifting his hand to his mouth, as if it would take it back. "Please don't think any less of me! I—just pretend this never happened, okay!?" he said, grabbing the sheet and covering himself with it as much as he could, as if it would hide away the filth that was upon him. How could she even look at him!? He was nothing!

"What? No…" said the femme, her hands on the berth as her legs curled beneath her. "I would never think any less of you, Megatron. You're my friend, and you always will be. Please, you need to tell someone about this. Not just me… I wish I could do something more for you, but I can't."

"No!" said Megatron, his optics going hard, though softening once more as she looked at him in surprise. "I-I can't," he whispered. "I can't tell anyone else. They'll… they'll think I'm lying! They'll laugh at me!" he said, his voice going high for a moment. "Please… please promise me you won't tell anyone," he said, grabbing her hands and taking them into his own.  
His spark was racing. Faster than it ever had been before. He was scared. Scared that she would tell someone. They couldn't know! Telling her was merely because he _had_ to let it out! He couldn't _lie_ to her anymore! Not to her face. Not to those perfect optics and those pouty lips. He could never lie to her.

Once more, Char was stumped for words, not knowing what to stay. It was just all so much to take in. How was she supposed to react to this? She wasn't an adult! She was just a kid. Knowing this made her want to vomit. Not to mention hold the mech across from her until all of his suffering went away. But if it was what he wanted… She couldn't break that trust between them. He'd shown so much trust in her by telling her this. She couldn't do that to him. Not when his trust was little to nothing as it was with everyone else.  
Giving a slow nod, she sighed, her optics going down. "Okay… if it's what you want," she whispered, letting her hand wipe away the small tear that ran down her cheek. "But please… y-you need to talk to someone about this? Does anyone else know? Your father!? Your therapist…?" She was desperate now.

Lowering his optics once more, Megatron shook his head. "No, and that's the way I want it kept," he said, looking back to her tear-stained optics. His were glazed from before, but they had stopped. There was a sudden… relief that flowed over him in the fact that he had confided in someone. Someone he knew would never tell anyone about his secret. Someone that he could completely trust in. He could see it in her optics. She wouldn't tell anyone. He knew she wouldn't now.  
Letting the sheets go loose, he gave a soft sniff, trying to collect himself. He didn't like seeming weak in front of others—especially Char. He loved her. He couldn't have her seeing him like this. He wasn't a sparkling! He was the one that should be protecting her, not the other way around.

"But… Megatron, please," said the femme, her optics pleading now as he grabbed his hand and put it into her own. "You can't go on living like this! You can't go back to that place! It'll just happen again and again!" she cried, now terrified for him. What if something worse happened!? How the hell could his mother _do_ something like that to him!? Her own child!? Her own son!? How sick was she!? No wonder Megatron had no sense of morals when it came to sexual activity!

"There's nothing else I can do! I have nowhere else _to_ go!" said Megatron, breathing hard. "Just… I don't want to talk about it anymore, okay?" he said, shaking his helm. "Just… please let it go." It was hard enough just having to think about it, let alone someone else knowing about it and looking down upon him as something disgusting. And that's what he was. Nothing but used goods. How could any femme, or even anyone, see him as something pure? He was defiled! He would forever be condemned because of his mother's actions. And she sat there and said it was cleansing him? Bullshit it was!

"Megatron, they have shelters for this kind of thing…" Char urged, never wanting to see him in his mother's hands again. At this point, no they had never met one another, and now she was thankful. If she ever saw that femme personally, she didn't know if she could keep Megatron's secret to herself. How _dare_ she put him through this!? It was painful knowing that she could do little to nothing, though. Not without breaking her promise…

"I said I don't want to talk about it!" snapped the older mech, his fangs bared as his head began to pound, as well as his crotch from the post-surgery. Immediately, he felt guilty as he saw the look in her optics. He didn't want to make her upset, but he just couldn't talk about it anymore. It made him want to vomit.  
"I'm sorry," he whispered, putting his hands into his lap. "I just… Everything's just too much for me to handle right now, okay? Maybe later I can talk about it. But not right now," he said, looking back up to her. He watched her nod, and once more, she embraced him, making him feel somewhat safer in these walls, her body warm against his.  
Primus, she felt so sweet and tender. And he knew she was. She was beautiful, inside and out. In every way possible. He knew that she wouldn't push him any further. Not because she was afraid of him, oh no. Just because he could feel that solace in her.  
**'Or is it something else?'**  
Wincing, Megatron had to pull out of the embrace, feeling his cable burn as it tried to stand. "Ow…" he whispered, tucking his knees up against his chest—even though it caused more pain to do so. He heard Char apologise, as if only because of him being in pain. That made him feel less embarrassed, and he simply said it was okay. It was better she didn't know that he was thinking of her like that. Not again. He'd never push himself like that onto her. He'd learnt his lesson the first time. Their friendship was worth so much more.  
Hearing the door open, Megatron looked up as the medic treating him walked in. No, not now. She had to leave now? But… she'd only just come! Visiting hours were still open, right? It wasn't even dark yet…

"Sorry, miss, it's time to take a look at your friend's injuries, okay? It'll only take a moment if you'd like to take a step outside?" said Cypher, giving the youngling a polite smile.

Char looked up, nodding. "I-I should probably get back home…" she whispered, though giving the mech an apologetic look. She didn't want to have to leave him, but she had to get back home. "My-my parents will be worried…"

"I understand," said the older mech, his optics lowering a little. "It's alright. I… I just thank that you came here to see me. I'm so sorry about what happened." He'd never forgive himself for what he had done to her. Forcing himself onto her like that? Primus, it was shameful.

"No, I'm sorry," said the femme, moving closer to him once more. She moved forward, giving him a gentle hug. "I promise you, whenever you need to, you can come over, okay?" She felt his warmth against her body once more, but she didn't keep against him for too long before pulling out. "I'll come visit as much as I can, too. In the park or something, of course." She knew he'd want to get out of his house as much as possible.

Megatron smiled lightly, nodding. /b'Oh, sweet Primus she smells so fucking good! If that damn doctor wasn't in here, I'd take that bitch and fuck her so hard!'/b He frowned, wincing a little as the femme got up from the berth. "I… I'll see you later."  
As Char left, he felt a sudden wave of anguish hit him. She was everything to him. Without her, his life was nothing. To simply see her gave him purpose to live. If it weren't for her, he doubted he'd still be here. He would have taken one of the instruments here and tried again. Tried again to take his life. Primus was nothing but a sick fuck for not having let him die the first time. But maybe there was a reason for that? Maybe he was meant to live . For Char. So in the future, they could live together and have a happy life. Right now, it was all he could hold onto.

*****  
Wincing as he stepped out of the car, Megatron felt his mother's hand against his arm. "I can do it myself," he almost hissed, his optics going dark for a moment. Now that he was healed, he was sent back home—not that he wasn't in severe pain still. Primus, he wished he could have more pain killers. Apparently he wasn't allowed, though, considering he was so young. Bullshit, he would have killed that damn medic for some more fucking pills!

"Megatron, stop being such a sparkling and let your mother help you," said the femme, giving a huff as her son finally grabbed onto her arm. She helped him out until he found his pedes, and she led him into their home and up the stairs. He wasn't meant to be walking around too much, so she basically sent him to bed.  
Pulling the covers over him, she gave a small smile, watching as he rested against the pillows. It hurt her so much to know what her son had done to himself. Trying to mutilate himself. He didn't need to do that. He just needed to control the demon inside him, so that he would never touch a femme the way that she had been violated by that filthy rapist. She could not let her son become like him. Like _them_.  
"Baby, I know you don't wanna talk about it… but I'm here for you, okay? Mummy's here for you, Mesgy," she said, lifting her hand and running it against his helm. She felt him try to move away, but she hushed him, making him become still. "It's alright. I'll keep you safe from the demons, baby. They'll never get you."

Feeling his body shudder, he wanted to run. He wanted to hide. Vomit from her filthy touch. But he couldn't do anything. He was too weak, especially now, just coming out of hospital. As soon as he was back at school—the better. He knew that if others knew of his attempted suicide and mutilation that he would be harassed, but being able to spend time with Char was completely worth it. And he would keep her to her promise. He would stay away from this place as much as he could, just to stay with the love of his life. Anywhere was better than here, especially when he could spend it with her.  
As he felt his mother's hand go down his frame to check out his wound, he tried to ignore her touches, and instead, simply thought about the precious femme. Her lovely optics, her smooth body. Those beautiful and gracious curves. Primus, how he wanted to feel her against his skin again. She was so silky smooth. And those lips…. He wanted them against every part of his body. Against every inch of him! He just wanted to be inside her, filling her with everything he had.  
"Nn-ow…!" he winced, giving a sharp intake of breath as he realised his body was trying to react to his fantasy. Oh, no! Not now! He looked down to his mother, the femme clearly not pleased. "I-I'm sorry! I-it's just sore…" he tried to cover up, seeing that look in her optics. That scolding look, like he had done something against her entire being. His optics lowered apologetically.

Removing her hand from the wounded area, Angra threw the blanket back over her son. "Once you're better, I'll make sure that the demons stay away," she said, grabbing the beads that hung on the side of Megatron's berth post. She placed them onto his chest. "For now, you ask for forgiveness for your sins before it's too late."

Wincing as the door to his room slammed, the future warlord frowned, his fingers touching the pendant of his religion. His fingers grew tight, his palm trying to crush the gear symbol. "Fuck you!" he whispered to it, throwing it across the room. He heard it clatter against the wall, falling to the floor. That bastard! He couldn't do anything for him! He couldn't let him die! He couldn't save him! Why the fuck should he _ever_ pray to that cunt!?  
Swallowing hard, he frowned to himself, his optics looking to where the beads had landed. He pushed himself up, tossing the sheet away from him. As much as he hated and wanted to never believe, something in him wouldn't let go, and he found himself on his knees, picking up the broken pieces.  
"I'm sorry…" he whispered, clutching them and holding them to his chest, as if Primus could actually hear him. He knew he couldn't, but fuck… something in his mind just _wanted_ to believe! Something in him just _had_ to! He had that hope, that maybe one day he would get an answer. That maybe one day he could truly thank Primus for being there for him.  
**'Oh, you're fucking kidding me! Your first fucking solar-cycle back and you're already on your knees, begging to that bastard fuck of a mech to help you. When will you ever realise that he's NEVER going to listen to you! He's not even REAL!'**  
Megatron shook his helm, whispering one of the prayers his mother had taught him when he was just a child. No, he would not listen! He would not fall into that demon! "Primus, forgive me. Give me strength to fight," he said, his optics clenched now. Anything was better than that mech inside his head. Even a false God.

*****  
"What…?" asked Char, her optics wide as she looked to the older mech in front her. They were sitting by the synthetic lake. Megatron hadn't returned to school yet, but that was only because he was truanting. It was over for now, and it was late afternoon. He'd been out of the hospital for a few good cyber-weeks now.  
How was she supposed to answer something like that, though? About Primus and her own beliefs. Primus was real in their history. It wasn't a myth. It was a fact. But… him listening to them? She wasn't sure about that. Her parents didn't exactly teach her much about religion, they'd just given her freedom of belief. Clearly not like Megatron's parents who were highly religious.

Megatron shrugged a little, his hands playing with the synthetic grass they were seated on. "Well, I mean, do you think that it's possible?" he asked. "That… someone really is out there? Listening to us? And helping us." He frowned a little, never having spoken to anyone else about this. To him, it was all he was brought up with. They didn't teach religion in school, only history. Religion was simply something you were brought up with by family and friends. All he knew was what his mother had placed into his head.

"I… I don't know," said the femme, looking back down. "Why do you ask?" She, herself, wasn't exactly religious. She just believed in the fact. But she knew Megatron's parents were highly religious—if only from learning from Megatron and picking up from it. "You don't think what your mother is doing to you is… right, do you?"

The older mech's hands went tight on the grass, ripping it out as he looked to the femme, his lips parting. "What she does to me is _not_ right!" he snapped, seeing the femme's optics lower a little. He frowned, shaking his helm. "Sorry… I-I didn't mean to yell."  
Megatron sighed, lifting his hand and brushing it against the front of his helm. "But no… That's not what I meant. I meant… do you think that there's any point in praying? Do you think that He can hear you?"

Char didn't know what to say. How could she answer that? She didn't know! She was just a sparkling still. What was she supposed to tell him? That what he believed in was a lie? Primus was probably the only thing keeping him sane inside that house, and she wasn't going to take that away from him just because she was brought up differently. He had all the right to believe in what he did.  
"I don't know, Megatron," she finally said. "I think it's whatever you want to believe in. There's no harm in believing and not believing. And I think that praying gives you hope. And… I like that in you. I've never really known any religious mechs like you. I… I think it's sweet." She blushed a little.

The vermillion optics widened a little, Megatron looking at the femme across from him. He couldn't help but smile at her timid blush. Even when she was shy, she was more than beautiful. He just wished he could lift his hand and touch her.  
His optics lowered a little, to her chest. It had started to develop nicely, giving her a more sleek, feminine look as she was reaching her sexual maturity. He couldn't help but swallow hard, his lips panting a little. However, he was caught off guard when he heard the femme give a sweet giggle.

"You know, you're pretty cute when you blush," she said.

Megatron shrank into his shoulders, not having realised. Thankfully, she didn't realise he had been staring, either. He tried to sit up straight, poking his chest out a little. "Don't you mean handsome?" he asked, giving a laugh. "Cute is for femmes. Like you."  
And there was that blush again. Megatron couldn't help but laugh once more, placing his hands back over his legs as he was sitting cross legged, his fingertips touching against the grass. "So you really think it's worth it, though? To try and let Primus listen?"

"Sure," answered Char. "Whatever makes you fall into stasis at night, I believe. Plus, I think you need that guidance. It might do you good."

Okay, so he would continue praying and believing, even if it was simply because Char said so. He'd been cheated and ignored from Primus before, so his faith was dwindling more and more as he grew, but if Char said it, then he would continue. For her.  
"I'll try to continue, then," he murmured, giving her a smile. He looked back up as she said something again. Asking if he had told anyone what his mother had done to him. Mainly Gammaray. He shook his helm, though, his optics lowing once more. Why did she insist on making him tell someone? Wasn't she enough? She was the only one he trusted.  
"I can't, Char…" he whispered, giving a soft exhale. "I know you think it's for the better, but… You don't understand what it's like. You don't know how it feels. To have your…" He stopped. That whore wasn't his mother. She didn't care for him like a mother should!  
"I just can't…" he repeated, though looking up as he felt a warm hand go against his own. He bit his lower lip as he looked into her optics. Primus, they were gorgeous. Begging for him to move closer to her. No! He couldn't. He couldn't do what he had before. Kissing her had been a mistake—even if it had been the most amazing thing he had ever felt.

"You little!" came a gruff voice, making the two younglings look up.

Oh, Primus. No. Megatron's optics arched. "M-Mother! It-it's now what it looks like!" he said, immediately getting to his pedes. He was forced to the ground though, being slapped across the face from the dark femme.

"You whore! Stay away from my boy!" snapped Angra, hissing at the young femme.

Char's hands went to her mouth as she watched Megatron impact with the ground. She ran to his aid, even though she was terrified. _This_ was Megatron's mother! How _dare_ she hit him like that!? And in public!? In front of his friend!?

At seeing the young femme go to Megatron's side, Angra only grew more angry. How dare that little whore try and corrupt her son!? She saw the way they had been looking at one another. So, this was the femme that Megatron had become friends with and had lied about? Typical!  
"Megatron, you come home this instant! I get a call from the school asking where you are, and I've told them I sent you there this morning only to find out that you've been truanting!? And with this no good whore of a femme!?" she yelled. "What have I told you about femmes and mechs!? They're no good for you! You're too weak to stop yourself!"

Leaning up, Megatron touched his bruised cheek, looking up at his fuming mother. "I'm sorry," he whispered, his frame shaking lightly. "I swear, it's not like that! She's just a friend!" Oh, how he wished that was a lie! How he wished they were more than that!

"Friend!?" scoffed Angra, looking at the younger femme. "Mechs and femmes can _not_ be 'friends!" she hissed, optics glowering at the young femme who she didn't know. She almost went to backhand the little slut, but didn't, simply because she was not her responsibility or child. "Now, get your aft back home!"

"You can't honestly go back there, Megatron," whispered Char, her optics arching as she looked at him. He was going to go back. She knew it. But he didn't have much of a choice, did he? And without her own mother knowing about her friendship with Megatron, she didn't exactly want to tell Megatron's mother who her mother was. She could only imagine the drama that would erupt from someone like that.  
"Please… you can't go back! She'll… she'll do it again!" she cried, though not loud enough for Angra to hear her. She wouldn't dare let Megatron's secret out in front of the femme who was touching and abusing him.

"I _have_ to!" snapped the older mech, though each word from his lips tasting like poison to his tongue. He pushed himself up, though, giving a pained noise as he felt his mother's hand on the back of his neck, forcing him in front of her.  
"I'm coming!" he yelled, getting a slap to the helm for his tone. He soon was quiet, looking back apologetically to the femme who was sitting on her knees in the synthetic grass. He could see how upset she was, and he didn't want her to be. But what could he do? Defy his mother? She'd only abuse him more! Make him suffer for his sins against nature and Primus.

Nudging her son, Angra gave a disapproving noise, keeping her hand tight on the flank of his neck. "You deliberately betrayed me, Megatron!" she barked, her optics hard, her lips tight. "When you get home, you're going to clean yourself off until you bleed! I can't believe you did this to me. Your own mother. Hanging out with a dirty femme like that. How dare you!?"

Megatron's jaw went tight, his optics hard on the ground as he was forced to continue walking. She wanted an apology, he knew it.  
**'Well then give her one, you big fucking pussy! Look at you. You're not a mech! You're not even a femme. You're nothing but the fucking dirt beneath this bitch's pedes! Such a fucking disgrace.'**  
Swallowing hard, the future warlord's face hardened as he smacked her hand away from him and moved away from her. "Keep your filthy hands away from me!" he said, something inside him snapping, telling him that she wasn't in control of him anymore.  
With a sharp sting, his face was forced to the side, though, his mother having slapped him once more across the face. He didn't fall this time, but it was enough to make him stumble back a little.

"What did you say to me, young mech?"

Lifting his hand, Megatron's optics lowered almost immediately and submissively. "Yes, Mother…" he murmured softly, giving a wince as she grabbed him once more. His spark thumped in his chest, knowing that he wasn't going to get out of this one easily. He would suffer her punishment again. And once more, he'd be defenceless.

**Author's Comment:**

****It is a bit all over the place here, but that's because I had to get back into the groove of the actual story by rereading and trying to continue where I had left off.

But Megatron's healed now, and you get to see that Char and he have become friends once more, despite what had happened between them.

I also really wanted some religious aspects coming into view here. You see so much of Angra's, that I wanted to focus a little more on Megatron and him losing his faith because of receiving no help or answers. And you get a little peek of Char's, too.


	9. Chapter 9

**Warning: Contains high levels of profanity. **

Being tossed across the room, Megatron fell to his hands and knees, panting softly as he winced, feeling something slap against his back. It was one of his father's tools. But it wasn't his father that was behind him, it was his mother, punishing him for being friends with a femme.

"You rotten little liar! You told me that you weren't seeing a femme!" yelled Angra, lifting the thick wire and lashing it against the mech's back once more. She heard him call out in pain, and so she dropped it, throwing it across the room before she grabbed him by the back of the neck once more.  
"How dare you lie to me like that, Megatron!? After all I've done for you! After all I've taught you about when it comes to your kind! Are you stupid!?" she asked, leading him up the stairs and throwing him against the bathroom wall.

With palms smacking against the tiles, Megatron's teeth bared, his optics hardening. He couldn't _take_ this anymore! How many more times would she slap him? Would she hit him!? Molest him!? Abuse him!? He couldn't live like this!  
"I swear…" he whispered, his optics arched now as he fell to his knees. He couldn't dare look at her. Not now. He knew she'd be giving him that look of utter disappointment. He didn't mean to hurt his mother, though! He did love her. Even if she was forever cruel to him.

"You swear, what, Megatronus!?" snapped the femme, her hands going tight as she folded them and looked at him as he were on the floor. "Don't lie to your mother. You know very well that I can see it in you…" Her voice softened this time, though, as she shook her helm.  
"I've tried my best with you. I truly have, baby. I don't want you to be like the rest of them! Hurting femmes all the time. Using them for nothing but slaves. I only do it for you…" She crouched down, hearing him make a soft sobbing noise. And placing her hand onto his chin, she brought it up. However, she was surprised when her sparkling's hand grabbed her own, throwing it from him.

"Don't you _dare_ touch me, you filthy whore!" yelled the future warlord, pushing himself up. He froze, though, horror taking over him as he realised what he had just said. Oh, Primus… He'd called her a whore! His own mother! And yes, she was, but to her face…!? He didn't mean to let it out! It just slipped from his tongue, like he had no control over it.

Angra's optics widened, though they went dark within a split-second, her hand lifting and slapping across her son's cheek. "What did you just call me?" she seethed, seeing the mech wince as her hand had slapped against him. "How _dare_ you call me such a degrading name!? I do what I have to, to keep you well and healthy, you ungrateful little ingrate."

Healthy!? By forcing pills down his throat like he was fucking sick!? Megatron's hand touched his cheek as he looked up at her. What was he supposed to say? She was his mother, and deep down, he was more than afraid of what she would do to him. He didn't like being hit by her, but as long as he was in this house, she would continue. And he would forever be her 'little mech'.

As the younger mech fell silent, Angra gave a huff, placing her hands to her hips. "Clean yourself up before you make the house reek of that filthy femme," she ordered, turning her back and taking the door handle. "And if I ever see you with her again, Primus will make you suffer."

Hearing the door slam, Megatron's hands wrapped themselves around his arms. He breathed deeply, his back slipping down the tiled walls as he sat on the floor. What was he going to do? He couldn't leave Char. But he couldn't defy his mother! And Primus? Would Primus truly punish him for having a friend? That didn't seem right! He loved that femme. More than anything… Why would Primus punish something so pure?  
Lowering his helm, he swallowed hard as he lifted his hand and rubbed it against the back of his neck. How could any child bare this? He just wanted it all gone? He wanted to die! Why couldn't Primus just fucking take him!? Why did he let him suffer so much!? He didn't understand!  
Shaking, he could feel the tears on the verge of coming out. No, he couldn't cry! He couldn't fucking _stand_ crying! It was weak! It was fucking pathetic! He wouldn't do it anymore. Not for himself. For her. For anyone! And certainly not Primus.  
Moving an arm out, he slowly crawled across the bathroom floor, reaching the side of the tub. He'd do what his mother said: clean himself off. But not for her. Not for Primus. He would clean himself because he couldn't stand feeling so filthy. Like a fucking plague. He hated it. He wanted to just tear his skin off! Cut into it and make him bleed. It made him feel good. Alive… A certain release came out of it. Like he was draining the bad oil from his body.  
Turning the tap on, he ran the water, tossing his small bits of armour off. And once the water was right, he grabbed the scrubber and scraped as hard as he could, scratching into his very skin and causing blood to run to the surface. He scrubbed his wrists, knowing there would be scars later. But even more so, he took one of the chipped tiles and ran it across his skin, watching as the dark oil pooled out. It wasn't enough to kill him. Just to make him know he was still alive. Just enough to know that he was still suffering. That this was his Hell. But enough to make him feel as if he were truly being cleansed of the sins within him.

*****  
He didn't mean to do it. In fact, his mind was telling him it wasn't even his doing! But there he stood, panting over the dead mech he had just killed. He just stared, oil dripping down his chin from where the older kid had punched him.  
Swallowing, his hands rested against the each side of the mech's neck, the body beaten to pulp. Dark oil sat in goops across the mech, smeared against his face, chest and anywhere else where it had managed to fly.  
"Oh, shit…" he whispered, the blank optics looking back at him. But he couldn't help but smirk, lifting a finger to trace it across the bloody lips. An actual giggle came from the teenager, but then it turned into something much more harsh. A deep, sadistic and manic laugh.  
"That's it, you fuck! How do you like it now!? You pathetic pussy cunt!" he laughed, sticking his fingers into the blood-covered lips. "Not so fucking tough are you now, you dead piece of shit!" He spat on the mech, looking back down to the lust that he had just showered over the lower half of the mech. He wasn't into mechs. No. It wasn't anything like that. He wasn't a fucking faggot. He just enjoyed the enticing sight of a worthless bitch getting what they deserved. Especially when they couldn't fight back because they were dead.  
Leaning up, he bit his bottom lip, looking at the blood that covered his hands. Primus, it smelt so fucking good. He could feel his already released cable wanting to go for seconds. He couldn't stay long. He was in public, and there wasn't any way of telling if someone would come down this way. He'd have a second wank over the corpse, and then he would clean everything up with no trace evidence. But for now… He licked his lips, bringing his fingertips to his mouth…

… With a sharp breath, Megatron's optics snapped online, his spark thumping hard. He simply stared at the ceiling for a moment before he swallowed hard, looking down at the tent between his legs.  
"Oh, what the fuck?" he whispered to himself, pushing himself up. How the fuck could he have just had a wet dream about something like that!? But… it felt so real…! It-it couldn't have been. There was no way that that could have happened. And why a mech of all things? He wasn't gay! He didn't like mechs like that…  
Maybe it wasn't the mech, though. Maybe it was something else. Maybe it was all the blood, and that orgasmic feel of power. He didn't know what it was, but Primus, his dream felt as if it hadn't just been a dream. It just felt too real. Sure, he'd had nightmares, but this? No, this was something else.  
**'Aww, I'm ashamed you've forgotten so easily.'**  
Megatron smacked his left hand to the side of his helm, wincing as he felt it pulse, as if there was some kind of parasite living off him. And there was. He growled to himself, though stopping as he listened carefully to what he had said. No way! It couldn't have been real! He couldn't have truly killed that mech! How could he forget something like that!? How the fuck could anyone!? It was fucking murder!  
"You fuck! You made me do this!" he whispered harshly, scraping his fingertips down the side of his helm.  
**'Well, someone had to. You were just going to let that bastard fuck you up. Making you look so weak. I wasn't going to stand for that again. He deserved it, anyway. Who are you to say he didn't? You were the one who wanted it just as much as I did. You allowed me to take control, Megatron. I did you a favour! You should be thanking me.'**  
Thanking him!? For killing someone!? No! He refused to believe it! He had killed no one! Fuck, he was fourteen! No fourteen year old killed someone out of cold blood! So he's tortured a few animals here and there. But they were animals! He didn't mean it! Fuck the thing that was inside his head. He would not listen! He had lied to him so much over the stellar-cycles! He had made him hurt Char! There was no way he would ever listen to him again! Never! It just wasn't true…!  
Throwing the sheet off him, he stood up, placing his hands onto his helm as he tried to calm down. Pills, right? That's what Gammaray was saying. Take them and he could concentrate. Surely that meant the thing inside his head would just shut the fuck up, right!?  
Grabbing the container that was on the desk inside his room, he unscrewed the lid, tipping it back and swallowing a few of the pills. He was only meant to have one or two—hell, he forgot—but he was sure a few more wouldn't hurt. Anything to get rid of the horrendous voice inside his head.  
**'You really think that's going to work, Megatron? Pff, you're more of a fucking dumb aft than I thought. I'll be back, Megatron. You know I will be. And then maybe you'll realise how fucking grateful you should be that you have me! Someone around here has to be a mech, because you sure aren't.'**  
Wincing once more, Megatron's hand tightened around the cylinder, tossing it across the room. "Fuck you!" he hissed, though stopping as he heard something in the next room. He looked up, sweat still sticking to his adolescent form.  
Swallowing hard, he walked to the door of his berthroom, keeping still to make sure it wasn't just nothing. But he heard it once more. Movement. Maybe it was his father coming home from a drunk night out? No, it didn't sound that heavy. It mustn't have been. If it were his father, he would be able to tell.  
Leaning a hand to the door, he slowly took the handle and opened it, an optic looking through the crack. It wasn't from his parents room. It was downstairs. An intruder!? His spark went tight. No, why the fuck would anyone want something from this dump!? There was nothing to take… He rolled his optics, mentally laughing at the poor soul who thought it was a good idea to rob this shithole. The only valuable thing in this place was his piano.  
Tensing, he looked over his shoulder, looking at the old instrument. It was safe in his room. But the thought of someone taking it? It made his spark tighten. The piano was the only thing inside this house that allowed him to be himself. Allowed him to vent. It was something he truly could say he loved. Besides Char. The two were as beautiful as one another.  
Turning back as he heard the muffled noises, he gently stepped outside of the door. It was hard not to make a noise considering how old and broken the house was, but whoever was downstairs clearly didn't care about that—considering they were making quite a fair bit.  
Walking to his mother's bedroom, he noticed the door was ajar. Inside, there was no one. Maybe it was his mother? No, there were definitely two. He could hear it. One 'bot couldn't make that much sound with a simple movement. Oh, shit, what if they had kidnapped his mother!?  
Taking the stick that was behind the door, he gripped it tightly. It was used for exactly this purpose. His father had made sure that there was always a weapon in the bedroom to use against intruders. At least it showed that maybe he cared? About what, he didn't know. Probably his fucking high-grade stash or something.  
Hearing something smash, his spark skipped a beat. "Mother…?" he whispered, optics alert as he tried to look everyone at once. He breathed heavily. No, he couldn't be weak! Something bad could be happening down there! He had to be a mech! He had to be strong!  
With a shaken hand, he gripped the railing of the stairs, slowly and carefully taking each step at a time. When he reached the bottom, he swallowed once more, feeling sweat drip against him. Oh, fuck, he just forgot! He was naked! Fuck, there was no time to think about that! He could cover himself up later. Right now, his mission was to take out whoever the fuck was in here!  
Moving to the wall, he glanced around the corner to the loungeroom. Whoever it was, they were in there. And then he heard it. Oh, fuck, they had his mother! His hands tightened around the rod, his chest filling up with a vent of air.  
"Die, you fuck!" he yelled, running into the room and smacking the other on the back of the helm. He heard a scream, his mother's, someone scrambling across the floor in the darkness. His hands tightened once more as he lifted the rod, ready to strike, though wincing as the light was turned on, his optics going out of focus.

"Megatron! What the hell are you doing!?" yelled the femme, running over to her son and grabbing the rod from his hands. She tossed it across the room, pushing him away and leaning down to the mech on the floor. "Oh my Primus, are you alright!?" she asked, hearing the other groan, hands covering the back of his helm.

"What the fuck!? I thought you said you were alone!" the mech yelled, looking up to see the other mech. "Who the fuck is this!?"

"I'm so sorry," Angra crooned, throwing a pillow at Megatron. "Cover your shame, you silly boy!" she yelled. "I'm so sorry, Hightone, he's sick. He just doesn't know any better! I'll get you some ice." She then turned back to Megatron, giving him a dark look. "Get the hell back upstairs, Megatron! Your mother is busy down here, can't you see that!?"

Was she serious!? Awkwardly, he looked at the wounded mech. Was he supposed to be sorry for this!? Who the fuck was he and why the hell was he in his father's house this late!? Oh wait… He stumbled back a little. "You… I…" He dropped the pillow and ran from the room, heading back upstairs.

Watching her son, Angra gave the mech who was getting up an apologetic look. "I'm sorry! I'll be right back. Ice is in the kitchen!" Running up the stairs, she heard the door slam to her son's room. "Megatron! You get your aft back down here!"  
Opening the door, she stopped in her tracks. "Don't you be telling your father about this, Megatron… or I swear I'll-,"

"You fucking whore!" yelled Megatron, having pulled most of his armour on. "What the hell is wrong with you!? You… you're nothing but a slut! Allowing those mechs to treat you like an object! I thought you knew better!" he cried, breathing hard. He'd seen her with other mechs before, sure, but it was all just starting to build up on him. He couldn't take it! And the sick thing was that Puncture knew about it all! He knew she was a cheating cunt! And he did nothing about it! But if he ever told his father? As if he would fucking believe him! He'd just say he was a liar! Trying to get attention! It's all they both ever did! There was no fucking point in trying to tell the truth! No one would listen to him! Not even his fucking parents!

"Don't you use that tone with me!" Angra snapped. "I do what I damn well have to, to keep a roof over your head and keep you healthy! Without your medication, you'd be running around loose like a lunatic!" she yelled, pushing him down. He may have been taller than her now, but that did _not_ mean he could speak to her like she was less than him. She did what she could to keep her son healthy in the head! Without the credits she got from these mechs, she wouldn't be able to afford the prescriptions Gammaray gave her when he wasn't giving it to her for free for sexual favours.

"I don't _need_ your medication!" the younger mech hissed, folding his arms. "You're the sick one," he mumbled, optics looking away.

"What did you say to me, young mech?" Angra asked, her pale optics narrowing. When Megatron said nothing, like a moody teenager, she grabbed his shoulder and threw him from the berth. "I said what did you say to me!?" she yelled, grabbing the ruler that was on Megatron's desk.

Optics widening as he was pushed to the floor, Megatron put his arms up in defence. "I'm sorry!" he yelled, eyeing the instrument and not wanting to get hit with it. "I-I didn't mean it, Mother! I won't tell Father, I swear! I promise! To-to Primus!"

Lowering her hand which held the ruler, Angra stood back up straight. "You best not be telling lies to me, young mech. You know what your father would do if he heard you saying lies like that."

"Yes, ma'am, I swear," Megatron said, optics still on the ruler. His systems loosened as the instrument was dropped onto the floor. And finally, he mother walked from the room, closing the door behind her.  
Staying still for a moment, he let out a long exhale, hearing his mother downstairs tending to the mech she was clearly fucking. He lowered his optics, looking to the floor. He wished his father would do something. She always made sure that Puncture wasn't home when she brought her 'guests' around, so he knew that his father probably had no solid proof. Wasn't the fucking stains all over the loungeroom and berthroom a fucking dead giveaway!? It was disgusting. No loyalty! No honour! No nothing! It was sick.  
What could he do, though? Nothing. He knew she was right. If he even mentioned this to his father, it would only be an invitation to a solid, drunk beating. Puncture never lifted a hand to Angra. Okay, so when he was drunk, he may have pushed her around a little. But nothing serious. He was the one that took on his father's wrath. He took all his punishment. And for what!? To protect his mother!? Fuck her! Fuck protecting a whore like her! A whore that did nothing but abuse him and make him want to vomit! But he knew it wouldn't stop. He had no voice here. The only 'bot that would ever listen to him was Char. She was the only one he could trust.  
Pushing himself up, he sighed as he heard his mother 'tending' to the mech downstairs. It was not a noise he wished to hear, nor any child should _have_ to hear. Not that loud. Not that open. He sat down on the stool. How could he fall asleep now? There was too much going on inside of him to do that.  
Letting his fingers take the case, he pushed it up. But he didn't touch the keys. He just looked at them. He wanted to touch them. He wanted to let everything come out. But he couldn't. Just like with Char. He wanted so much to be with her. To give her everything he had—not that it was much—but he was willing to do anything for her. Just to see her smile.  
Leaning his cheek onto his knuckles, he smiled, giving a soft hum. How he wished he could run his fingers down her frame. Tease her in ways she couldn't even imagine. She didn't know it, but he could be as gentle as ever when he wanted to be. And he would be with her. He couldn't dare hurt her again.  
**'But you have no problem in hurting mechs. Stalking them down to the underground tunnels and slaughtering them in a vengeful lust?'**  
Stiffening, Megatron's fingers left the piano, leaning back on the stool. No. No, not again. He couldn't have killed that mech! He was lying! He was just scaring him! Trying to get him to give in again! Well he wouldn't! He couldn't!  
**'Aww, and what if Char knew? Oh my… She'd leave you, wouldn't she? She'd walk away, just like everyone else has. She wouldn't stick around for a murderer. Then again… maybe the little slut would enjoy a big tough mech. Would explain why she hangs around with the dumb fucks she calls 'friends', ey?'**  
Clamping his hands to the sides of his helm, the future warlord's fangs bared as his jaw went tight. "No!" he whispered through clenched denta. "I won't believe it! I didn't kill anyone! You're lying! You're always lying!"  
**'Really? Megatron, you should know better than that. I don't lie. I give you the truth. As harsh as it can be sometimes, you need a good slap across the face with a reality stick. When you turn on the television tomorrow morning, you will see a missing 'bot report from his parents. And then you'll remember it all. Fresh, warm… arousing.'**  
Moving his hand to his mouth, the young mech shook his helm. No, it couldn't be true! How could he have ever!? Sure, he remembered the mech picking on him in the bathrooms at school, but murder…? He'd wished and fantasised about it, numerous amounts of times. Fuck, he'd even jacked off to murder fantasies before. But actually _doing_ it!? It was just a fantasy! Nothing more! Just a wish!  
"No… it can't be true," he whispered, feeling sick to the stomach. But he knew better. He knew the voice inside his head wasn't lying. He knew it was true. He knew he'd killed that mech. He'd killed him in cold blood. And he meant to. He meant every fucking hit to the mech's body!  
"What am I going to do..?"  
**'Nothing. You're going to sit back and watch as his family cry, searching for his missing body. And when they do find him? It'll be too late. The toxins from the tunnels would have eaten up every bit of evidence. You do nothing, Megatron. You just sit back and enjoy the show. Unless you wish for your little femme friend to leave you…'**  
Swallowing hard, he nodded. Sure. He could do that. He could sit back and keep quiet. It's not like he hadn't learnt to be a deceiver, anyway. For Char, he could keep silent. He needed her. That mech wasn't worth losing her! He'd stay silent. He'd let it fester. And in the end, it would just go away. Just like everything else.

**Author's Comment:**

****So this is pretty much starting to build up to the end now. I didn't include the parts that have already been in earlier series I've written. You find out in War Within that Megatron killed a mech when he was young, and the scene was written in there. I left that out here, because there wasn't much point in re-writing it/copy and pasting it. So the mech that he dreamt about, was in fact real, and the first real murder of his life that he kept secret until he told Audiowave about it in War Within.

Also, here's a mention of Megatron cutting his wrists. You're probably wondering, to those who see my art, where he got the scars on his wrists from? This is where he first really started cutting. More seriously, anyway. As a way to wash away the sins in his blood.


	10. Chapter 10

Part X—Finale.

Sixteen stellar-cycles of life and this was what Megatron had to show for it? Absolutely nothing. His school grades had gone to an all-time low, and that was even if he _went_ to school to see how things were going. He found it hard to concentrate on anything. His mind felt like it was just horrid thought after horrid thought. Blood. Violence. Sex. Rape. Cigarettes. High-grade. And of course, Char.  
Sitting in the small shed that was outside of the family home, he ran his fingers through the oil that was on the table. He'd figured out it was safe down here. Puncture hardly used to shed anymore, and Angra just never came down here. She was too classy for a dirty place like this. He laughed at that. Fucking whore. She'd take it up the valve anywhere she could.  
The cheating had become ten times worse. Puncture was just getting more drunk and violent. He hardly saw his mother or father. They avoided each other at all costs until around dinner time. That was fine by him. It allowed him to do whatever the fuck he wanted to. Like now.  
Putting the body down, he ran his fingers down to the hip-line of the cyber-cat. "What is it that she finds so fascinating about it?" he whispered to himself, optics concentrating on the body before him. The voice inside his head was clearly gaining more control.  
Nowadays, he was nothing but a smart arse, getting into fights on purpose, just to show other worthless mechs who was boss. By now, the bullying had stopped. Well, the direct bullying, anyway. There was always someone who thought it was funny to talk shit about him behind his back, but with his growth, he was probably the tallest in his school now. And everyone knew not to directly fuck with him. It would only cause pain on their behalf.  
Even with his mother and father he had started to backchat. Sure, his mother still molested him, and he'd always fall back to being a coward at the end of the day, but when he'd had his father's leftover high-grade—things became different. His father usually just beat the scrap out of him when he back-chatted, but that was nothing different. He could handle that.  
The only 'bot he was nice to was Char. Still, she was his true tormentor. It was like a spell was cast over him. He could be the cruellest of mechs, but as soon as she was in the room, he could become the sweetest. He loved her more than life itself. To make her happy made him happy. He would literally do anything for her, and she knew that.  
But did she use him? Take it to her advantage? Primus, sometimes it felt that way. He just wanted to be with her! All the time! He wanted to smell her, feel her, touch her… Be inside her. It made his insides burn with a deep desire he didn't even know existed in someone's soul.  
Stopping, he dropped the body, dark blood covering his hands. Damnit… now he was hard. He shouldn't have thought about her like that. He'd tried so much to keep in check. To never talk to her like he heard the mechs talk to his mother. They were nothing but trash. Then again, so was his mother. But Char was different. She may have cast a spell on him, but he welcomed every part of it. One day, he knew, she'd come to her senses, and they would spawn little sparklings and live happily ever after.  
Hearing movement from outside, he quickly pushed away the body into the shadows on the bench. He heard his name being called, so he pushed himself up and casually washed his hands in the sink before walking up the stairs. It was only his mother.

"What in Primus' name are you doing down there, baby?" said the older femme, walking over to her now taller son. He was at least a head above her now. And she knew he would only grow more and more—to her disappointment.

"Nothing, I was just seeing what Father left down there," he said nonchalantly. "Do you need something?"

Angra smiled gently at how polite her son was being. It wasn't unusual. He was only wicked when a femme was around, or when he had taken high-grade. She knew her boy was good inside. He was evil because he was a mech, but that's what she was trying to release from him every night with Primus.  
"I just needed help getting something from the top cupboard, and considering your father isn't around…" Her voice turned to a mumble at then, her optics rolling. She held out her hand. "Come on, baby, Mummy needs your help."

Watching as the femme turned around, Megatron's optics narrowed. How easy it would be to push her down while her back was turned to him. How easy it would be to wrap his arm around her throat from behind and choke the fucking life out of her!  
"Of course," he stated, clearing his throat as he followed her inside the house. Inside the kitchen, he listened to her babble on about his father, saying how much he was never here, how much of a drunk he was. At every turn of her back, he rolled his optics, wishing he could pick up one of the instruments in the kitchen and stab her with it. He was so fucking sick of having to be in the middle of their bullshit!  
She cheated. Fucking leave her! He drinks. Fucking leave him! The both of them were as pathetic as one another. Too fucking sad to leave one another because they both knew no one else would take them in. And why should they? They were nothing but sinners themselves.  
"Here," he said, grabbing the container that was up the top of the shelf. "Is there anything else you need while I'm here?" he asked, having become rather quiet around his family. Truth be told, all of them avoided one another the best they could. It wasn't just Puncture and Angra, he avoided his parents, too. He couldn't help but feel his insides burn when he just _heard_ one of their voices. So he secluded himself down in the shed. There he didn't have to think about them, see or hear them. And thus he wouldn't have the urge to kill them.  
Did he truly wish to kill his parents? Part of him did. But another part of him couldn't. Sure, he could live better off out on the streets and have someone caring actually pick him up, but he couldn't leave. There would always be something holding him back to this place. He hated it. He loathed it. But it was there. He knew this was home.

Putting the container down, Angra turned back to the taller mech. "You're fine. But I want you inside before dinner time. I heard there's some hooligans around the town that are starting to cause trouble. I don't want you out late, so I'm setting a curfew."

What!? Was she serious!? "You're kidding, right?" he asked, though straightening up as she looked at him. "I… had plans, that's all."

"It's not with that whore of a femme again, is it!? You know my feelings towards that girl, Megatron. If I ever see you two together, I _will_ get a restraining order."

Megatron's hands went tight for a moment. Ever since his mother had seen the two of them spending time together, she'd gone nuts over the whole thing. Their friendship now had to be a complete secret. To everyone and anyone who knew the both of them. This meant the only way he could see Char was during school, wagging with her, or sneaking into her bedroom at night so they could talk.  
"No, Mother, I promise," he said with what sounded like one-hundred per-cent honesty. "I like to keep fit, that's all. I like to have my nightly walk around the block. I won't be long. I will be home before dinner. After all, I'm Mummy's little mech, aren't I?"  
He watched as the light in his mother's optics lit up. Even though each word was like poison to his spark, he knew how to play her now. He knew what she really liked in him. His innocence. Him being her special little sparkling. Fuck, he was sixteen now! He didn't _need_ her! But he was also terrified of her still. He often didn't know how he even plucked up the courage to lie to her anymore. Then again, he wasn't exactly himself, was he?

Lifting her hand, Angra nodded. "Okay, baby. But you better be home before dinner. Okay?"

"Yes, ma'am," Megatron nodded, cringing as he felt her hand go against his shoulder before she walked from the room. He hissed to himself, wiping his hand over where she had touched him. Every little thing about her made him want to puke. So many nights he had visioned the moment he killed her. How he'd do it. How he'd make her scream. But they were just dreams. Fantasies. He could never truly kill her. And that's what made him sick to the core.

*****  
Sitting at the park bench, Megatron gave a light smile as he listened to the femme speak. He didn't know why, but he felt so at ease when she was here with him. He loved her company. He loved the way she looked in the darkness of the night. Hell, he loved everything about her.

"But, yeah, will you be making it this stellar-cycle?" she asked. When he looked at her awkwardly, she let out a soft, femme-like laugh. "Were you even listening to me, Megatron?"

"Hah… sorry, I was a little distracted," the older mech murmured softly. "You just look very lovely tonight, that's all. I mean, you always look lovely, but… there's something different tonight. I'm just trying to figure out what it is."

Char blushed deeply. Of course, they both knew the feelings weren't mutual between them, but that didn't mean they couldn't be friends. Char did love Megatron, just not in a romantic way. She saw him as her best friend. Someone she could tell anything to and never be judged—unlike most of the other 'bots she hung out with.  
"My mother gave me this," she said, picking up the necklace that was around her neck and sitting against her chest. "She said it was hers. She said it brings good luck." She took it off and placed it in her hand, looking at the chain. "Here…"

As he felt her hand against his, Megatron's optics widened, looking back at her as the pendant was placed into his palm. "What? No, Char, I could never…"

"You need it more than I do, Megatron," urged the younger femme, closing his dark fingers around it. "You mean a lot to me, Megatron, you should know that by now. I want what is best for you. Honestly, I'd feel better if this was in the hands of someone who could learn to really appreciate it. My mother gives me so much stuff that… well, sometimes it's a little overbearing."

Looking down at the necklace, the silver mech saw that the pendant was a small symbol. "What does this mean?" he asked, looking back to her soft optics.

"It's Ancient Cybertronian," said Char, looking back to the symbol. "It's the symbol of luck back in their language. Before it got all… well, what it is today," she mused. Ancient Cybertron was always shown as such a beautiful and peaceful place. Nothing like what it was like today.

Looking back at the pendant, Megatron tightened his hand around it reassuringly. "I'll take good care of it," he promised, giving a light smile. "And hopefully one day this place will be a better place. And we can be happy, instead of… everything else going on."

Char's optics lowered for a moment. "I wish you'd let me help you," she said, knowing Megatron returned to the molestation every night. Primus, she had begged him not to go back there, but who was she to tell him to leave his home? It may be filled with horrible memories, but it was still his family. His mother and father. As horrible as they were, they were his creators. They had given him life, and though she hated what was being done to him, she still thanked them for having their son.

"Don't," Megatron whispered, watching as a small tear came from her optic and ran down her cheek. He placed his hand against her, picking her chin up. "Don't do that. Someone as beautiful as you should never cry," he said, optics watching her own.

Watching him, Char couldn't help it, another tear streaming down her cheek. She leant into his hand, though, feeling it against her. It was so warm and gentle. She'd seen how cruel he could be, but it wasn't the Megatron she knew personally. How could she blame him for acting out? He had all the right to. Besides, she knew it was just a mask. And a massive misunderstanding. Other's just didn't get him like she did.  
"I'm sorry," she whispered, unable to keep her tears back. "I just… I hate knowing what you go home to every night. I can't stand it, Megatron. I wish there was something I could do!" She leant into him, crying into his chest and shoulder, her arms wrapping around him.

Feeling the warm femme against him, Megatron's arms wrapped around her in return. "I'll be okay, Char… I promise," he whispered reassuringly to her. "I have you to support me. And… knowing you're my friend is more than enough to keep me here on this planet."  
Taking her shoulders, he moved her out of his chest—even if every inch of him was telling him to keep her close against him. Primus, her touch was like gold. And he placed his thumb against her cheek. "Don't cry, Char. I-I can't stand the sight of someone so beautiful as you falling to such weakness. I promise you, one day this will all be over, and it'll be just you and I. I promise. We can do anything we want… I'll give you everything you've ever wanted. And… I'll be happy knowing you're there by my side."

Char's optics arched as she watched him. She knew his words were a lot deeper than he meant, and she loved that he cared so deeply for her. He was such a sweet-spark. It hurt her knowing that she wasn't romantically interested in him, and that she couldn't fulfil what he wanted. But she would never let him go just because he loved her in such a special way. She praised it. She cherished that he could have any feeling like this after the way he had been treated as a child (and still was).  
She overlapped his hand with her own, pushing the tears back. "I will _always_ be by your side, Megatron. I promise you that. No matter how hard times get, I promise that I will always be here when you need me. You're my best friend. I love what we have together; I love the mech you've become."

It was so hard not to lean in and take her lips. And Primus, how he wanted to claim them as his own. His body shook from the strain and fight for self-control. Oh, fuck, he wanted her so, so much! He bit his lip, optics turning as he sighed.

"Megatron…?" The femme watched as he stood up from his seat. "Did I say something wrong?"

Hearing her stand up behind him, he shook his helm, looking across the park. "No… You've… you've said everything I've ever wanted to hear, Char," he said, looking back to her sweet, soft cerulean optics. "I've waited so long to hear you say those words. I know that they're not as deep as I wish them to be… but one day… they will be."

Char's optics arched once more as she looked to how hopeful he was. She smiled gently. Maybe one day when Megatron wasn't so sick, then yes, she would lay with him and they could have sparklings. But until that day? She could not be with him romantically. He could not hold the relationship that she needed. She needed someone stable, someone that could protect her, and, of course, someone who she loved more than just a friend.  
"Maybe one day," she murmured softly, not wishing to hurt his feelings. She knew how cut up he could get about it, but she still cherished their friendship. It was not worth losing.  
She walked over to him and gave him another hug. "You better be heading back. I don't want you getting into trouble."

As Char moved out from the embrace, he nodded. He didn't want her to go, but she was right. It was nearing dinner time, and he had to get back. "I'll see you tomorrow," he said, watching as she nodded and waved before turning around to leave. He stood there for a moment, watching where she had previously been.  
"One day…" he whispered, smiling to himself. And she had promised. She had said that she loved their relationship. It was enough hope for him. It was more than enough! Primus, how he loved her. How he would make her his in due time. And they would live together, so, so happy!  
Still having the pendant in his hand, he lifted it up and kissed it. "You really do bring luck," he mused, tucking it away in his armour pocket on his hip. The last thing he wanted was for his mother to catch it. She'd know who it belonged to, and then he'd never get to see his beloved ever again.

*****  
Opening the door, Megatron heard his mother in the kitchen, his father in the lounge, watching the television. He ignored the both of them, still in his own bliss. Oh, Primus, how sweet it was. He didn't care what happened tonight. He was the happiest mech alive right now! Nothing could bring him down, not even his mother.

"Megsy, is that you?" said Angra, looking up from the stove. At seeing her son, she saw his glow. "You must have had a good run."

Megatron was pulled from his daze, turning to her. "Wha-oh… yes, it was good. I'm… dirty, I need to take a shower."

Angra quirked an optic ridge. "Be quick, the water's running out… Your father forgot to pay the bill… _again_"

Hearing his father yell from the lounge-room, Megatron grumbled to himself. Of course he did. He frowned, though nodding to his mother. "Yes, ma'am," he said, heading up to the bathroom. Once in, he closed the door, placing his hand against it before turning the shower on. He'd get washed up, hope the scent of Char was off him, and then he'd go and have dinner when it was ready. Yes, tonight was perfect.  
Adjusting the water, he leant back, letting it flow over his growing form. Primus, how he'd give anything for Char to be against him. Anything! To feel her soft breath against his neck. So feel her gentle hands against his chest, belly and…  
"Shit!" he hissed, fangs bared as he looked down to himself. "No. No, I can't… I can't defile her like that…"  
**'Yes, yes you can, Megatron. Come on! Give into her! Didn't you hear what she said at the park? She loves you! She promised she'd wait for you… Come on, give in. Show her what you're made of.'**  
Swallowing hard, the young mech growled to himself, slamming the water off. No! He wouldn't! He couldn't! He pushed the shower door aside, grabbing a towel and bringing it to his face. "I won't… I will not!" he yelled in a whisper, hearing the voice within his head only taunt him further.  
Slamming his hands around his helm, he groaned, smacking his head. "Stop it! Stop it! Just fuck off!" Clenching his optics, he fell to the floor, naked and now cold. He shivered, breathing hard. Why did it have to be so bad now? He thought it was bad when he was younger, but now? That thing wasn't just inside his head anymore; it took fucking control of him! Without him even knowing sometimes!  
**'You big fucking pussy! You're not a mech! You're a femme! You're everything your fucking father says you are! And you ****_deserve_**** to be your mother's little bitch whore!'**  
No… he was not! He was not a femme! He was not weak! He'd show him… It was the only way he'd get him to shut up! Standing, he tried to ignore the further taunts and name-callings. And he grabbed his armour, putting it on.  
With the constant ringing in his audios, he stumbled into his room, looking around for the hidden stash. There! Leaning down, he grabbed the bottle, leaning it back and drinking as much as he could. "You want to fuck with me!? I'll make you shut up for good!" he growled, taking another long chug of the high-grade he had collected from his father's left over cubes.  
Slamming it down, he breathed heavily, pressing his palm into his optics. "Nnn! Fuck…!" he groaned, swallowing hard as he sat down on the stool. There… The bastard had shut up. He lowered his optics, putting the cube on the side of the piano. Peace, at last. But for how long? He didn't know. He smirked, the high-grade already hitting him. Hell, he hadn't eaten a thing all day.  
Placing his hands to the lid, he pushed it up, listening to the perfect silence within the room. And he pulled out the pendant that Char had given to him, kissing it once more before laying it in front of him, where the sheets would lay. She was his inspiration tonight. "I'll wait for you, Char," he whispered, giving a wide, and already quite drunk grin. "I love you so, so much…"  
He let his fingers touch the keys. This one was for her. This one was for when he would share a future with her and have a little bunch of sparklings running around in a fancy, posh house. His dream home. Hell, sometimes he didn't even care if he was living in the gutter. As long as Char was with him, he'd be the happiest mech on Cybertron, and in the entire Universe. She was the flame to his passion, a flame that had removed the chains from his icy spark. And tonight, he would lay back in that peaceful fantasy. And in his peaceful playing, he didn't even hear the threat in the back of his processor.  
**'You'll regret that…'**

_…The End…_

The end. I'm actually... really glad that this fic has been finished. I loved the idea at first, and I was heaps into it, but then all of a sudden I just dropped it, and I tried to get back into it, but I was all over the place, and I didn't feel like I had the flow anymore. But here's the final chapter, and it DOES have a significant meaning to it. For this was the night that Megatron raped his fist victim. I didn't write that in there, but it's meant to be a lead on for those who have read my series. You should know the scene, where he is drunk after playing the piano and then gets into an argument with his mother and she kicks him out. Well yeah.

It's a shame that such a wonderful day can turn so dark with just a little high-grade/alcohol. And, I guess, with Megatron's crazy arse mind.

But yes, this was the finale to this series. I hope you enjoyed it. I honestly wish I was more into it than I was in the end, and I still like going back and reading the earlier chapters, I just wish I could have gotten into the flow more.

And of course, I put up the critique for the full story, not just this chapter.

All characters are G1/IDW based.


End file.
